not worrying Archives - Dreaming Beneath the Spires

In which Birds Teach us Not to Worry

We can worship God in church, and we can worship God while walking through the spectacular natural world he made, which is full of clues to his character. The heavens declare God’s glory, without words.

Trees, the ocean, the day and the seasons tell of a God who loves beauty, who made all things well, who offers us rhythms as a gift, alternating periods of blazing bright and quiescence, when we gather strength for the next period of full flourishing.

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I think Christ uses examples from the natural world most tenderly when he assures us that the Father feeds the birds of the air, who do not sow or reap or store away in barns, (Matt 6: 25-34).

Or that he clothes in glory the lilies of the field who do not labour and spin. He watches the sparrow, his eyes full of delight.

And we are more valuable.

So do not worry about your life, about the future, Jesus says. Your father is watching you, as you, with delight, watch the finches at your feeder, for whom you’ve laid out food and fat and water. You are under his protection.

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Do not worry.

Not worrying is a mental discipline we learn with practice, just as writing well, or running fast are creative and physical disciplines we learn with practice.

So I am training myself to be calm, relaxed and super-chilled, to go through my day peacefully.

* * *

Norman Vincent Peale describes, in one of his Positive Thinking books, being hustled from event to event at a conference he was speaking at. He was finally gets to his room, and is told, “Dinner in 10 minutes.” “Yes, yes,” he says nervously, and looks around stressed. Then he realises he doesn’t care if he missed dinner. He could get room service.

He lies down, falls asleep, wakes up twenty minutes later, refreshed, calmly snaps on his bow-tie, and goes to dinner. He had only missed the pre-dinner speaker and the soup, and by all accounts neither was good.

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Kathleen Chesto writes, “A story is told of a safari in the Serengeti. A researcher was rushing to the mating grounds of the African elephant. He had started late and pushed his porters relentlessly to arrive by mating season. On the fourth day, the porters sat down and refused to move. The translator explained they would go no farther until they had given their spirits time to catch up with them.”

Peale waited for his spirit to catch up with him, only missed the soup, and did his evening peacefully

* * *

One thing I have learned from the Peale story, which I think of every time I am running late is that rushing and stress are simply not worth it. If I am running late, I don’t look at the clock at home, or in the car. I get there when I get there, and enjoy it, and if I’ve missed the soup, so be it.

(Must add though, that having been the girl who always ran late all my life, in mid-life I have realised that being late is a choice, which I don’t need to make. It’s stressful, and a bit rude. Am getting my act together and re-configuring things so that I am late less often.)

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Another area in which I have decided not to worry is my blog. Interestingly, we cannot control the most important factor in the success of our blogs: i.e. how many people read it. Normally, the number of my readers or “Unique Monthly Visitors” in blog and Google parlance rises, month on month. When it drops, in summer or December, I wonder if I should write more.

However, I cannot, at present, see how I could write more, or devote more time to my blog without neglecting the other things God has given me to do—I want to work on a book. I am a wife, and mother, own a house and a garden and a body which I need to exercise. I am a spiritual being, and I need to nurture my relationship with God from which, truly, everything flows.

And so, having spent 30 minutes drafting a blog, I need to lay it aside for the day, and when I am worried that it is static, I need to pray about it as I go about my day.

For it is a Christian blog, and the meat of good Christian writing comes from surrender, from burrowing more deeply into the holy things of God and reporting your findings, and that can be done while gardening or walking.

And so if I find myself worrying if my blog will ever grow, I pray instead that I may know Christ more, and that he may bless my blog, and give me whatever ideas he may have for its growth. For he is kind, and his ideas will lead to energy, not exhaustion.

And so I lean in, and listen instead of worrying–and ideas come.

So that is my rule for myself vis-à-vis my blog: I am not allowed to worry. I am allowed to pray, for blessing, for ideas, for strategy. And, oddly, that simple rule will work for every area of my life.

Quit Worrying about your Savings Plan: Jesus

By Anita Mathias

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Jesus was a spectacularly loving person, caring and reaching out right through his crucifixion— so when he speaks about money, we’d be wise to listen up.

We’d be wise to listen because his desire, the reason he said he came, was for the fullest human flourishing, that we may have LIFE in abundance.

We’d be wise to listen because he only speaks in kindness.

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I am re-reading the Sermon on the Mount. There has been a Christian conspiracy down the ages to quietly ignore parts of it.

But I bet Jesus meant it when he said “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, but rather store up for yourself treasures in heaven.” He’s consistent in this advice: Do not labour for food which perishes, but for food which endures to eternal life.

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The standard financial advice is to keep 6 months salary in cash at all times, (and to have 10 times your final salary in cash or stocks by the time you retire).

In other words, save enough to ensure that you can live without needing to trust God, without needing to lean on his ingenious ideas, and without needing to see his miracles and deliverances.

There is no kindness nor God-wisdom in this advice, but a lot of self-imposed deprivation, of harsh treatment of the present.

Six months salary in cash at all times; ten times final salary squirrelled away–think of how much fun and adventure and experience and opportunities for kindness and generosity and hospitality we miss out on with this sterile focus on saving enough money so that we will never have to rely on God’s kindness or generosity. So that we can, completely erroneously, perceive ourselves to be invulnerable.

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There is a popular cliché about work-life balance: Nobody on his deathbed ever said, ‘I wish I had spent more time at the office’. What is more likely is that nobody ever said on his deathbed, “I wish I had more money.”

But we may well wish we’d travelled more, seen more theatre, more film, read more books, taken more friends out to dinner, been more generous to our children, instead of working so darn hard, saving so much.

Stop worrying about saving for the future. And do not waste today worrying about the future.

This radical statement is, in fact, a sacred command. Do not worry about tomorrow Jesus says, setting us free, great liberator that he is.

* * *

The effects of 2008 world-wide credit crunch, and the subsequent contraction of economies are lingering. It’s probably a safe bet that many of my readers will not be on track to have ten times their final salary by the time they retire.

And neither am I!!

But, truthfully, I am not worried.

(If I received a cheque in the mail for ten years salary, I would bank most of it. But, in its absence, I would not deprive myself of travel or generosity or what is necessary for the flourishing of my work, or my family’s flourishing because I do not have 3-6 months salary in the bank and my retirement is not properly funded. I would not, however, go into debt, or put more on my credit card than I can pay in full this month for anything, except food.)

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And that is why the Gospel is good news to the poor. Guys, do not worry, Jesus says, soaring into sublimity. The God who cares for the sparrows and lilies will care for you. Seek God today, and let Him worry about tomorrow.

It is splendid advice, and, with God’s help, I intend to follow it.

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I once read some research that tracked people’s thoughts through the day. The top things women thought about were 1) their hair!! 2) money. How much they have, how to save, what to buy, how to get bargains, how much money others have, how they got it. Women thought more about money and their hair than sex, the study observed. Men, on the other hand…

However, why not gradually shift our focus in the direction Jesus suggests–to focus on alternative eternal treasures—and fill our bodies with light? In Matthew 13, in a slew of metaphors, living in God’s kingdom is consistently referred to as treasure: the treasure in a field, the pearl of great price worth selling everything to buy.

Why not slowly develop the habit of eating Scripture, this treasure hidden from the busy? Develop the habit of Scripture meditation, an acquired taste in our fast-fast world of distraction. Start small, start with a short time, and increase it as the appetite grows for time with Jesus in quiet eternal realms which stretch and expand.

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Scripture meditation yields great rewards. Paul Meier M.D. found in his study of the psychological and mental health and spiritual lives of evangelical seminary students that students who practiced almost daily Scripture meditation for three years or longer were significantly healthier and happier than students who did not meditate on Scripture daily.

Or as Jesus might have said, their whole body was full of light.

* * *

For what we focus on determines the course of our lives. If our eye is good (“good eye” opthalmos haplos in Greek, refers to generosity) our whole body is full of light. If on, the other hand, our eye is bad, (evil eye, Greek ophthalos poneros, refers to stinginess or greediness) our whole body is full of darkness.

When I think of the most generous people I know, there is a lightness and loveliness to them. And when I think of the most stingy, money-focused people I know—who cannot part with money, cannot force themselves to be generous, who will manipulate others into helping them, but rarely help others—there is a kind of darkness in their lives. The English word miser comes from the Latin miser, “unhappy, wretched, pitiable, in distress.” The focus on money clouds their hearts and lives in darkness.

Whoa, Jesus, so many things you say are literally true!!

Jesus, Positive Thinking, and Mental Health

By Anita Mathias

Mental health, like physical health, is on a continuum. When someone totally loses it, and is obviously “mad” enough to be sectioned, we say they’ve lost touch with reality.

But how few of us see reality as it really is. With a God’s eye view. As Jesus taught us to see it.

If we could train ourselves to see and think the way Jesus taught us to, what splendid mental health we’d have!!

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Jesus’s teaching was strikingly positive. And here are a few ways I am trying to train myself to think the way Jesus taught us to. And better mental health will be a fringe benefit of this.

1 He taught us not to be afraid.

“Do not be afraid,” echoes through the Gospels. Most of our fears never come to pass. And even when our anxious minds help produce the very thing we most dread, God’s help is available to help us deal with it.

There is a difference between prudence (adjusting one’s actions because an adverse outcome is very probable), and fear: irrational dread!

2 Jesus told us not to worry about anything at all.

What a splendid recipe for mental health, freeing us from circular and literally sickening worry. Worry is particularly unproductive, because most of our worries (like most of our fears) don’t come to pass, and, again, God’s help is available in our worst case scenarios.

3 Jesus advises us not to judge.

Judging is like deciding on 360 degrees of someone’s personality based on 10 degrees of information. It leads to a shrivelling of the heart, of emotional intelligence, and of our life-experience because of the habit of rapidly writing people off.

And when in obedience to Jesus, we refuse to judge, but instead remain open, we learn, we learn, we learn!

4 Another startling bit of advice Jesus gives is forgiving if you have aught against any. How sweeping.

When specific grievances surface in my conscious mind, I attempt to dissolve them by thanking God for the good things about the person, by praying for the person as whole-heartedly as I can, and by praying for grace to turn the acid and claws of my feelings towards that person into sweetness.

Any hatred–towards nations, for instance–is as harmful to our mental and emotional health as hated of individuals. I recently talked to a Christian man who was consumed, to the point of mild insanity, with his hatred of the US and the harm its foreign policy has done. Releasing aught against any would require him to release his hatred of the US—not for the sake of the US, but for his own sake.

I similarly know two American Christian men who are consumed by their hatred and dislike of Barack Obama. Gosh, I have never witnessed such hatred towards a politician as many American Christian nurture towards Obama. If I hated Obama as much as these two friends of mine appear to, I would need to “forgive” him before I stood praying to keep the waterfall of grace between me and God flowing and unclogged.

Far-fetched? I remember Catherine Marshall saying she had to forgive Henry VIII for his desecration of monasteries as part of her releasing aught against any.

5 Another instruction of Jesus which is greatly conducive to mental health is “Do not let your hearts be troubled; neither let them be afraid. Trust in the Father, trust also in me.”

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So many of Paul’s precepts are about following Christ in the secret place of the thoughts.

Rejoice always; in everything give thanks. Believe everything works out for good.

Paul’s life was full of extreme pressures—both glorious preaching, miracles and influence, and imprisonment, solitary confinement, floggings, slander, and disgrace.

The mental health and strength he cultivated in the secret places of his heart kept him sane, productive and creative in the very direst places of his life, such as the dreadful Mamertine Dungeon from which he wrote his most joyful and inspiring letters.

Ah, obeying what Jesus taught us as literally as we can! Mental health flows from it, and creativity too!