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On Using Anger as a Trigger to Transform Ourselves

By Anita Mathias 2 Comments

Dear friends, I am continuing my series of short meditations on the Gospel of Matthew. This one, the eight in the series, concludes the meditations on the sublime Sermon on the Mount. Thank you for reading along!

On Using Anger as a Trigger to Transform Ourselves

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged,” Jesus says. “For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

And so, Jesus reiterates a law of life: sowing and reaping. “Those

who draw the sword will perish by the sword,” he says. The

swift to condemn will be judged more harshly. For the seeds we plant

in the garden of our lives–our secret thoughts, our words, and the

kindness or meanness of our actions determine our flourishing.

We reap what we have sown in unexpected ways and at unexpected

times, since God, the righteous Judge, observes both our generosity

and our unkindness towards those we judged powerless to help

or harm us, and God holds our lives in his hands.

 

Jesus does not condemn accurately reading character. That

is an essential life skill—to realise that not everyone is trustworthy,

honest, truthful or decent. Indeed, Jesus warns us about

deceptive, smooth-talking people–“wolves in sheep’s clothing,”

out to devour you. Assess people by the fruit of their lives,

he says; thornbushes don’t bear figs.

 

However, dwelling on another’s faults, while ignoring our own,

invites judgement, Jesus says. He recommends using our irritation

with annoying or evil people as a reminder and trigger for

self-examination. When we are bothered by a speck in another’s eyes,

Jesus recommends checking if we have a whole log of the same

failing or a greater one in our own eyes. (Interestingly, Freud says

we are most infuriated by our own faults mirrored in other people!).

Obsessive judging is wasted time and energy. We must train ourselves

to refocus that energy into transforming those blind spots, limps, and

cracks in our characters, which so often destroy the house of people’s lives.

 

Besides, fretting over others’ faults leads only to evil, as the Psalmist says.

We unconsciously imitate speech and character traits we dwell on!

Read a good stylist, and you write better; focus on another’s stinginess,

manipulativeness, or dishonest self-promotion, and you risk mirroring it.

 

And what of us who’ve been judgey and critical? When we

repent, we live “under the mercy,” in Charles Williams’ phrase.

Jesus forgave Peter, who betrayed him, and he will forgive us.

God devises a unique calling suited to both the naturally sweet and

the naturally outspoken and no-nonsense. Whatever seeds you

have sown into your life, thistles or grapes, place them in the hands

of the God of redemption. Ask him to make the garden of your life

bloom, and to help you do the work he has given you to do.

 

I would love you to read my memoir, fruit of much “blood, sweat, toil and tears.”

Rosaries, Reading, Secrets: A Catholic Childhood in India in the UK, and in the US, here, well, and widely available, online, worldwide 🙂

If you’d like to follow these meditations the moment they appear, please subscribe to Christian Meditation with Anita Mathias at Apple Podcasts, Spotify or  

Amazon Music

or Audible. And I would be very  grateful for reviews and ratings!!

If you’d like to read my previous recorded meditations,

9 Do Not Worry About What To Eat: Jesus

8. Happy Are the Merciful for They Shall Be Shown Mercy

7 The Power of Christ’s Resurrection. For Us. Today

6 Each Individual’s Unique and Transforming Call and Vocation

5 Change Your Life by Changing Your Thoughts

4 Do not be Afraid–But be as Wise as a Serpent

3 Our Failures are the Cracks Through Which God’s Power Enters our Lives

2 The World is full of the Glory of God

1 Mindfulness is Remembering the Presence of Christ with us.

Thank you 🙂

Filed Under: Applying my heart unto wisdom, Blog Through the Bible Project., Matthew Tagged With: charles williams, Christian meditation, fretting, Gospel of Matthew, judging, sermon on the mount, Sigmund Freud, sowing and reaping

Changing the Soil of My Heart, Little by Little  

By Anita Mathias

Good Seed, Good Soil, Abundant Harvest

I read the Gospels, I hear them preached, and tap, tap, tap, go my jubilant feet.

The Gospels tell me lovely things I wanted to believe but feared were not true; that fellow Christians often suggested were not true, by their deeds, if not their words; and that our world definitely believes are not true. I read the Gospels and sense everything sad coming untrue, as Sam Gamgee exclaims in his delight.

What only fools gather and heap into barns? And see here: He says, it’s safe to forgive and bless even our pesky enemies, for he has our affairs in hand. And–look, he says prayer can move mountains, lame feet, dead bodies, anything… And look, I am commanded not to worry, but to live free as a bird–commanded, I tell you.

Tap, tap, tap, my toes beat at the Gospel’s jazz rhythm of hope.

“Oh yes!” I resolve as Rilke did when faced with the sheer beauty of the Archaic Torso of Apollo, “I will revise my life.”

I have decided to follow Jesus, my heart sings. I will forever live in the waterfall, the force field of God’s power.

* * *

And then, I go out into the world, where not everyone in the stands is a cheerleader and I am sometimes cheated; where my prayers are not instantly answered and my words are plagiarized.

And something leaks out of me.

The resolve to seek comfort and joy in the filling of the Holy Spirit? Well, it becomes chocolate and the Holy Spirit. And 10,000 pedometer steps, for my body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, well…

And keeping the house orderly for God is not a God of disorder but of peace…Well. And waking very early in the morning, while it is still dark to spend time with my heavenly Father. Well…

Oh, I had wanted to speak words which  give energy and  life, but I hear myself speaking critical words which sap resolve, words which stem from tiredness and frustration, and I am filled with shame.

Oh, wretched woman that I am, who will rescue me from this body of death?

* * *

Jesus Christ will, oh yes, he will, through multiple means of grace.

And here is one, suggested by the prophet Habbakuk, 2600 years ago. I will write down the vision and make it plain that I may run when I read it…

What I resolved when I was on fire on the mountain-top, I will re-read in the damp-squibby valley.

I have a sheet of “epiphanies and resolutions” in my prayer journal. I resolutely pray through each desire of my heart, a page or so a day,  and when I come to that page, I resolve again.

And I resume revising my life.

* * *

In the long run, failure does not matter. Getting side-tracked doesn’t matter. All that matters is beginning again. And again. The simple glory of persisting.

Yes, I will eat more veggies and walk more because my body is a temple of the Holy Spirit and I want to keep it fit and strong. Yes, I will run an orderly house for the sake of my own mental health and happiness and for the peace of its inhabitants. Yes, “there is nothing but love,”–so help me God, I will remember that “all is small save love, for love is all in all.” Yes, I will wake early. And writing, oh yes, writing! I will write faithfully as a bird sings, for that is what I’ve been created to do.

“The essential thing in heaven and in earth is that there should be long obedience in the same direction. There thereby results, and has always resulted something which has made life worth living:   virtue, art, music, dancing, reason, spirituality– anything whatever that is transfiguring, refined, foolish, or divine,” Nietzche wrote in Beyond Good and Evil.

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavours to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours,” Thoreau observed.

And I read my resolves, and I re-resolve, and by persisting  with the help of invisible friends—the Lord Jesus himself; God my Father; the Holy Spirit my Comforter; and the protective angelic hosts sent at my prayers — I will more than conquer those invisible enemies of my soul, the birds of distraction, the sun of discouragement, the thorns of hassles and the temptation to earn more than necessary.

And, God willing, my heart through constant amendments with the sun of grace, the water of the word and the compost of Christian community will become good soil, in which those beautiful seeds of the gospel, seeds of mercy, kindness, gentleness and love will be fruitful–ever so fruitful.

The first version of this appeared on Addie Zierman’s beautiful blog. Thank you, Addie.

Image Credit

Filed Under: Applying my heart unto wisdom, Blog Through The Bible Project, In which I Pursue Personal Transformation or Sanctification, Matthew Tagged With: Addie Zierman, blog through the Bible project, good soil, Gospel of Matthew, Gospels, Personal Change, Revising one's life, writing down the vision

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  • Believing Is Seeing (Miracles): “According to Your Faith, Let It Be Done to You.”
  • Jesus Knows the Best Way to Do What You Are Best At
  • On Using Anger as a Trigger to Transform Ourselves
  • Do Not Worry About What To Eat: Jesus
  • Happy Are the Merciful for They Shall Be Shown Mercy
  • The Power of Christ’s Resurrection. For Us. Today
  • Our Unique and Transforming Call and Vocation
  • Change your Life by Changing Your Thoughts
  • Do Not Be Afraid–But Be as Wise as a Serpent
  • Our Failures are the Cracks through which God’s Light Enters
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https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/28/believing-is-s https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/28/believing-is-seeing-miracles-according-to-your-faith-let-it-be-done-to-you/
Jesus was the only person in the Bible who restored the sight of blind men. The two blind men called out a simple prayer, known as the Jesus prayer, “Jesus, have mercy on us. And their faith activated a miracle when Christ replied, “According to your faith, be it done to you.” And healed them!
The same simple prayer changes things in our lives, too; the transcript of our prayers often becomes the transcript of our lives. However, we live in the “already-not yet” Kingdom. We often see answered prayer but not always, because God often has a happier biography in mind for us than our scripts, which might involve endless scrambling up ladders of striving, success and ever-more. Faith also involves leaving these worries in his hands.
A recent walk around Oxford—Christ Church and Ma A recent walk around Oxford—Christ Church and Magdalen College in particular, with my cousin, Dr. Prem Pais, recently retired Dean of St. John’s Medical College, Bangalore, and his wife, Dr. Nalini Pais. It was lovely seeing them, and showing them beautiful Oxford.
And I’m excited that my little meditation podcast is listened to in 167 cities in 14 countries. A bit astonished, really, and humbled!
Here’s the latest one, on how Christ always knows the best way to do what you are best at. https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/20/jesus-knows-the-best-way-to-do-what-you-are-best-at/
When we are out of our depths and bewildered, Jesus can take the wheel, and add a 1 to our zeroes. But if we manage to surrender our strengths to him, then he can astonish us with exponential growth, adding zeroes after our 1. And, of course, surrendering everything to his wise, kind Lordship is the very best way to live.
https://anitamathias.com/.../jesus-knows-the-best- https://anitamathias.com/.../jesus-knows-the-best-way-to.../
LINK IN BIO!
Jesus knows the best way to do what you are best at!!
Simon Peter was a professional fisherman. And Jesus keeps teaching him, again and again, that he, Jesus, has greater mastery over fishing. And over everything else. After fruitless nights of fishing, Jesus tells Peter where to cast his nets, for an astounding catch. Jesus walks on water, calms sea storms.
It’s easy to pray in desperation when we feel hard-pressed and incompetent, and, often,
Christ rescues us in our distress, adds a 1 before our zeroes.
However, it’s equally important to turn over our strengths to him, so he can add zeroes after our 1. And the more we can surrender our strengths to his management, the more he works in those areas, and blesses them.
A walk around beautiful Magdalen College, Oxford, A walk around beautiful Magdalen College, Oxford, with a camera.
And, if you missed it, my latest podcast meditation, on Jesus’s advice on refocusing energy away from judging and critiquing others into self-transformation. https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/11/on-using-anger-as-a-trigger-to-transform-ourselves/
https://anitamathias.com/.../on-using-anger-as-a-t https://anitamathias.com/.../on-using-anger-as-a-trigger.../ link in bio
Hi friends, Here's my latest podcast meditation. I'm meditating through the Gospel of Matthew.
Do not judge, Jesus says, and you too will escape harsh judgement. So once again, he reiterates a law of human life and of the natural world—sowing and reaping. 
Being an immensely practical human, Jesus realises that we are often most “triggered” when we observe our own faults in other people. And the more we dwell on the horrid traits of people we know in real life, politicians, or the media or internet-famous, the more we risk mirroring their unattractive traits. 
So, Jesus suggests that, whenever we are intensely annoyed by other people to immediately check if we have the very same fault. And to resolve to change that irritating trait in ourselves. 
Then, instead of wasting time in fruitless judging, we will experience personal change.
And as for us who have been judgey, we still live “under the mercy” in Charles Williams’ phrase. We must place the seeds we have sown into the garden of our lives so far into God’s hands and ask him to let the thistles and thorns wither and the figs and grapes bloom. May it be so!
Spring in England= Joy=Bluebells=Singing birds. I Spring in England= Joy=Bluebells=Singing birds. I love it.
Here are some images of Shotover Park, close to C. S. Lewis's house, and which inspired bits of Narnia and the Lord of the Rings. Today, however, it's covered in bluebells, and loud with singing birds.
And, friends, I've been recording weekly podcast meditations on the Gospel of Matthew. It's been fun, and challenging to settle down and think deeply, and I hope you'll enjoy them.
I'm now in the Sermon on the Mount, in which Jesus details all the things we are not to worry about at all, one of which is food--too little, or too much, too low in calories, or too high. We are, instead, to do everything we do in his way (seek first the Kingdom and its righteousness, and all this will fall into place!).
Have a listen: https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/03/do-not-worry-about-what-to-eat-jesus/ and link in bio
“See how the flowers of the field grow. They do “See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labour or spin.  Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendour was dressed like one of these. Or a king on his coronation day.
So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” 
Of course, today, we are more likely to worry that sugary ultra-processed foods everywhere will lead to weight gain and compromise our health. But Jesus says, “Don’t worry,” and in the same sermon (on the mount), suggests other strategies…like fasting, which brings a blessing from God, for instance, while burning stored fat. And seeking God’s kingdom, as Jesus recommends, could involve getting fit on long solitary prayer walks, or while walking with friends, as well as while keeping up with a spare essentialist house, and a gloriously over-crowded garden. Wild birds eat intuitively and never gain weight; perhaps, the Spirit, on request, will guide us to the right foods for our metabolisms. 
I’ve recorded a meditation on these themes (with a transcript!). https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/03/do-not-worry-about-what-to-eat-jesus/
https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/03/do-not-worry-a https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/03/do-not-worry-about-what-to-eat-jesus/
Jesus advised his listeners--struggling fishermen, people living on the edge, without enough food for guests, not to worry about what they were going to eat. Which, of course, is still shiningly relevant today for many. 
However, today, with immense societal pressure to be slender, along with an obesogenic food environment, sugary and carby food everywhere, at every social occasion, Jesus’s counsel about not worrying about what we will eat takes on an additional relevance. Eat what is set about you, he advised his disciples, as they went out to preach the Gospel. In this age of diet culture and weight obsession, Jesus still shows us how to live lightly, offering strategies like fasting (which he promises brings us a reward from God). 
What would Jesus’s way of getting fitter and healthier be? Fasting? Intuitive spirit-guided eating? Obeying the great commandment to love God by praying as we walk? Listening to Scripture or excellent Christian literature as we walk, thanks to nifty headphones. And what about the second commandment, like the first—to love our neighbour as ourselves? Could we get fitter running an essentialist household? Keeping up with the garden? Walking with friends? Exercising to be fit enough to do what God has called us to do?
This meditation explores these concerns. #dietculture #jesus #sermononthemount #meditation #excercise #thegreatcommandment #dontworry 
https://anitamathias.com/2023/05/03/do-not-worry-about-what-to-eat-jesus/
Kefalonia—it was a magical island. Goats and she Kefalonia—it was a magical island. Goats and sheep with their musical bells; a general ambience of relaxation; perfect, pristine, beaches; deserted mountains to hike; miles of aimless wandering in landscapes of spring flowers. I loved it!
And, while I work on a new meditation, perhaps have a listen to this one… which I am meditating on because I need to learn it better… Jesus’s tips on how to be blessed by God, and become happy!! https://anitamathias.com/2023/04/25/happy-are-the-merciful-for-they-shall-be-shown-mercy/ #kefalonia #family #meditation #goats
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