sowing and reaping | Anita Mathias: Dreaming Beneath the Spires

On Using Anger as a Trigger to Transform Ourselves

Dear friends, I am continuing my series of short meditations on the Gospel of Matthew. This one, the eight in the series, concludes the meditations on the sublime Sermon on the Mount. Thank you for reading along!

On Using Anger as a Trigger to Transform Ourselves

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged,” Jesus says. “For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

And so, Jesus reiterates a law of life: sowing and reaping. “Those

who draw the sword will perish by the sword,” he says. The

swift to condemn will be judged more harshly. For the seeds we plant

in the garden of our lives–our secret thoughts, our words, and the

kindness or meanness of our actions determine our flourishing.

We reap what we have sown in unexpected ways and at unexpected

times, since God, the righteous Judge, observes both our generosity

and our unkindness towards those we judged powerless to help

or harm us, and God holds our lives in his hands.

Jesus does not condemn accurately reading character. That

is an essential life skill—to realise that not everyone is trustworthy,

honest, truthful or decent. Indeed, Jesus warns us about

deceptive, smooth-talking people–“wolves in sheep’s clothing,”

out to devour you. Assess people by the fruit of their lives,

he says; thornbushes don’t bear figs.

However, dwelling on another’s faults, while ignoring our own,

invites judgement, Jesus says. He recommends using our irritation

with annoying or evil people as a reminder and trigger for

self-examination. When we are bothered by a speck in another’s eyes,

Jesus recommends checking if we have a whole log of the same

failing or a greater one in our own eyes. (Interestingly, Freud says

we are most infuriated by our own faults mirrored in other people!).

Obsessive judging is wasted time and energy. We must train ourselves

to refocus that energy into transforming those blind spots, limps, and

cracks in our characters, which so often destroy the house of people’s lives.

Besides, fretting over others’ faults leads only to evil, as the Psalmist says.

We unconsciously imitate speech and character traits we dwell on!

Read a good stylist, and you write better; focus on another’s stinginess,

manipulativeness, or dishonest self-promotion, and you risk mirroring it.

And what of us who’ve been judgey and critical? When we

repent, we live “under the mercy,” in Charles Williams’ phrase.

Jesus forgave Peter, who betrayed him, and he will forgive us.

God devises a unique calling suited to both the naturally sweet and

the naturally outspoken and no-nonsense. Whatever seeds you

have sown into your life, thistles or grapes, place them in the hands

of the God of redemption. Ask him to make the garden of your life

bloom, and to help you do the work he has given you to do.

I would love you to read my memoir, fruit of much “blood, sweat, toil and tears.”

Rosaries, Reading, Secrets: A Catholic Childhood in India in the UK, and in the US, here, well, and widely available, online, worldwide 🙂

If you’d like to follow these meditations the moment they appear, please subscribe to Christian Meditation with Anita Mathias at Apple Podcasts, Spotify or

Amazon Music

or Audible. And I would be very grateful for reviews and ratings!!

If you’d like to read my previous recorded meditations,

9 Do Not Worry About What To Eat: Jesus

8. Happy Are the Merciful for They Shall Be Shown Mercy

7 The Power of Christ’s Resurrection. For Us. Today

6 Each Individual’s Unique and Transforming Call and Vocation

5 Change Your Life by Changing Your Thoughts

4 Do not be Afraid–But be as Wise as a Serpent

3 Our Failures are the Cracks Through Which God’s Power Enters our Lives

2 The World is full of the Glory of God

1 Mindfulness is Remembering the Presence of Christ with us.

Thank you 🙂

What We Sow, We Reap because God, the Great Mathematician, the Impartial Referee, Keeps Score

By Anita Mathias

Jacob Epstein, Jacob and the Angel

For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. (Matt 7:2).

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall be shown mercy. (Matt 5:7).

As a man sows, so shall he reap. (Gal 6:7).

These principles run though Scripture from Genesis to Revelation.

* * *

I’ve been following Christ with increasing seriousness for 24 years now–but have loved Christ for much longer.

However, I no longer play Scripture roulette—try to find a verse which will tell me what to do and will provide a way out of the maze of decision.

When I don’t know what to do, I seek the face of Jesus and the voice of the Holy Spirit. And then, or concurrently, I look for principles running through scripture.

* * *

And this is one: that what a man sows, he shall reap.

Believing it is a practical version of what Proverbs calls, “the fear of the Lord.” We are careful in our behaviour, especially when no one is watching, when we can get away with things, because God is watching, and what a man sows, he shall reap.

When we have the upper hand, when we can get away with things, when no one will ever know, when we can, with impunity, be mean, cruel or dishonest—the secret good or evil we then do determines the course of our lives, and the sweetness or bitterness of them. It determines the things that happen to us. It determines our destiny.

How so? Because a very good mathematician is keeping score. Because an impartial referee is watching the game.

* * *

Jacob cons Esau out of his birthright and his blessing because he could, because he could get away with it, he thought.

And yes, well, desperate with hunger Esau promises that Jacob could have his birthright as the eldest son (a double share of the inheritance). And Jacob then lies to Isaac, claiming to be Esau, so getting the blessing Isaac intended for Esau.

And God watches it all, and God does not like it. Instead of receiving the blessing Isaac intended for Esau, Jacob goes through 20 years of unhappiness as a hired man, while Esau stays home and becomes very rich, being blessed in exactly the way his father wanted him to be.

* * *

Jacob falls in love with Rachel, “who is lovely and form and beautiful”. Leah, we are told, had weak eyes, which, in the years before corrective lenses, probably affected her facial expression as she scrunched up her eyes to see better, and her posture as she stooped to see.

And Jacob, after serving seven years to pay the bride price for Rachel, gets Leah, whom he neither loves nor wants. He then has to serve yet another seven years for Rachel whom he does love and want. Fourteen years to pay bride prices while Esau stayed at home hunting, and marrying a third wife with family wealth, building up a small army of 400 men (Gen. 32:6).

Jacob is tricked in a way ironically parallel to his own deceptions. He who tried to trick his older brother out of his birthright now is tricked out of seven years salary for a older sister he does not want.

But Laban had no idea of how Jacob had tricked Isaac and Esau. It wasn’t exactly dinner table conversation. But God who watched everything allowed Laban to deceive Jacob as Jacob had deceived Esau and Isaac.

* * *

We reap what we sow because character is destiny, I feel convinced. Have you come across a lovely kind person whom everyone likes? Talking to them you largely hear good things about people, about how people were lovely to him. Were Jacob such a person would Laban have had the heart to trick him so cruelly? Very likely not.

Do you know bitter, abrasive, power-hungry, manipulative people? They are angry about many things, cross with many people. In a weird way, like appears to be attracting like.

The universe reflects your character, measure for measure. Your life often serves up to you what you are, measure for measure. Now, this perhaps sounds like something from The Secret.

But, in fact, it runs through the Bible: what a man sows he shall reap. The measure we give is the measure we shall receive. Measure for measure.

* * *

Jacob whose name means deceiver is deceived and things do not go well for him until he seeks to be blessed by the source of all blessing who blesses him with the ambiguous blessing of a limp, a reminder in his flesh that if he, Jacob, the manipulator, is going to live the rest of life under God’s blessing, he MUST rely on the source of all goodness and blessing for blessing, and not on his own ingenious tricks and stratagems.

In which sowing goodness leads to a more abundant harvest that we could have imagined

By Anita Mathias

In late 2006, we planted bare rooted twigs in our orchard–cherries, and plums, yellow, red, and purple. This week we have harvested hundreds of plums off these bare rooted twigs that cost less than a pound each.

And in the years to come, God willing, those twigs, which grew from a single seed, will give us thousands of fruit.

That is the rate of increase God has built into nature.

Wow. I wonder if we would have the same rate of return if we sowed good deeds into the soil of life, like the good turn Boy Scouts were encouraged to do without any hope of return. Would that yield a mighty and inevitable harvest of blessing? I believe so–sowing blessings into other people’s lives is a sure way to be blessed ourselves, will yield a inevitable tide, or circle of blessing in our own lives.

The Family For Whom Everything Went Wrong

By Anita Mathias

I once knew a family for whom everything went wrong. Consistently. For instance, the father of the family decided to retile the leaky roof on his house. But when winter came, it wasn’t done, and they all crowded into one room, and all got ill.
They had a massive vegetable garden, kept chickens (this was in America!) but somehow there was never any money. The mother of the family kept telling everyone how many years it was since she had bought a new dress.
If there was illness going around, they caught it. The children were scrawny and sickly. The mother had frequent psychosomatic illnesses which made it painful to her to move, and periodically the church pitched in, taking them meals and cleaning the house. |And then, the house was clean and the children well fed.
The father worked, but was adolescent, demanding home-made blueberry pies for dessert, for instance. The mother was overwhelmed. The children consequently were not particularly brought up, rarely helping about the house.
They switched churches frequently, once they guiltily felt they had exhausted the resources of love and compassion and helpfulness of their current church.
The father had a dead-end, low wage job. He wasn’t particularly bright, and probably didn’t have the greatest career prospects whichever field he entered. And then he got a destructive promotion to an itsy-bitsy managerial position, which meant no paid overtime, which sent the family further downhill. They were never able to keep any cash in the bank.
I and my friends often discussed this family, and wondered why they were financially struggling, when apparently they worked as hard, or harder than other people.

* * *

Interestingly, there was another family in the same church we attended, whose sole breadwinner had exactly the same job. Neither man was particularly brilliant, and the second family had two more children.

Yet, this family thrived. The children worked hard and brought in money from their part-time jobs doing baby-sitting, and yard work. The mother was a genius of thrift. They had many friends who helped them.

What was the difference? Energy, survival smarts, practical intelligence?

And another small thing. I knew both families, and did various small favours for the first family—took meals over, gave them things, hired their kids at overly-generous rates. Nothing helped very much. The other family, when I thought of it, helped me, though I was better off–introducing me to writers they happened to know; giving me useful information on the town I was new to; and lots of practical tips.

The other was essentially a selfish family, never to my knowledge helping anyone, always absorbing the help of others, while not appearing grateful, simply because all the help was just a drop in the bucket compared to their needs. I don’t mean to imply that they decided to be selfish; I mean the struggle to keep their heads above water, and compete—for the mum did have aspirations for her children—absorbed all their energies.

Recently, I put my finger on the essential difference between two families. One was selfish, only looking out for itself. The family that sought to bless other with what they had, even if it was just information and connections, was blessed. They eventually bought a large house in a good part of town on one limited income. The children all went to college. The family that just looked out for itself, never volunteered in church, for instance, did not thrive.

But when I came upon that difference it was an ah-ha moment. Was the selfishness linked to the fact that there was no flow of blessings in their life? I thought of other families I knew, who may have had money, but did not have blessing, as defined by friends who love you, a loving family, an enjoyment of life, health, well-being, shalom. They were all selfish.

Conversely, the families I knew, whether Christian or not, who were blessed with versions of the good life, which is, to my mind, a combination of success to some extent, financial sufficiency, friends, good family relationships, being respected for the content of one’s character, internal peace, were giving families, both on a personal level, and in involvement through volunteerism with the church, community and schools.

It’s the law of the tides. Give even when you are busy and overwhelmed, and blessings come back to you. What you sow, you reap. But to sow sparingly or not at all in the field of life, means a meagre or non-existent harvest. And the surest way to be blessed is to bless.

I realised that the hardest, least blessed times in our family’s life was when we were selfish as a family, trying to conserve time, money and resources, chiefly because we were overwhelmed. Things changed when we decided to be generous and to bless other people in small ways, mainly with money, but also with time and energy.

And I became determined that we would certainly NOT be a selfish family. I began, to look out for small ways our family could bless others. Lending things, giving our things to people we knew who needed them (even buying a replacement on occasion!!), rigorously giving away things we no longer needed, storing things for people, giving money, having people over for meals, helping people move, just sowing good seed into the field of life. Partly because one of the things I really want in life is God’s blessing, and it is in blessing that we are blessed; it is in giving that we receivel it is in sowing that we reap.

Sometimes, when one is busy and overwhelmed, one almost has to decide to, by faith, take the time to help and bless, knowing that that is the sure way to be blessed with the time, energy and blessing one desires oneself.