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When You Think it’s All Over, And That End is a New Beginning

By Anita Mathias

John_on_Patmos

So John, beautiful, sensitive evangelist, is exiled to Patmos, a Roman penal colony, by the Emperor Diocletian.

It’s all over for him. He who had been one of the three with Jesus at every climactic moment of his ministry; who had leaned on Jesus at the Last Supper feeling the physical and verbal beat of his heart; who stood by Jesus at the Cross, seeing the heart of the Gospel; who intuitively saw the connection between the Old and New Covenants, beginning his Gospel echoing Genesis, In the Beginning was the Word.

Oh, he’s done for.

Here he is on barren Patmos, the sun scorching him by day, and the moon by night, the few springs hard to find.

It’s all over, John. You had been commanded to go into all the world, and preach the Gospel to all creation.

But here you are, alone on Patmos.

You who once wrote with the pen of an angel—you have recorded your memories of Jesus.

Nothing new is happening. What are you to write?

* * *

Meanwhile, the Roman Empire rushes on in its empirely way, and the Christian Church flourishes underground, getting stronger in its paradoxical way. And John: alone, forgotten.

Silent.

He who has learned so much, and has so much to teach has no platform; no readers, no listeners, nothing…

* * *

It’s apparently all over for you, John…

Except for that one thing that still can happen to the one exiled to Patmos, who feels that all his life has been a failure, and that life is almost over

One thing no one can rule out: not the exile, or the prisoner, or the solitary.

GOD.

God spoke to you.

* * *

The Word of God.

The Presence of God.

It changed everything for John.

He hears a loud voice like a trumpet, and turns around to see a man whose eyes were like blazing fire. His voice was like the sound of rushing waters. And from his mouth a sharp, double-edged sword. His face was like the sun shining in all its brilliance (Revelation 1: 10-16).

And Jesus said

“Do not be afraid. I am the First and the Last. I am the Living One; I was dead, and now look: I am alive for ever and ever!”

Do not be afraid, oh hidden one, for you are hidden in me.  I am the Alpha and the Omega, the A and the Z, and within this alphabet, all words are possible, all things are possible.

I was dead, dead as you fear your future is, dead as you fear your hopes, your work and your influence are. But now I am alive.

And in me, all the crushed, hidden, suppressed things in you shall come alive. Tweet: And in me, all the crushed, hidden, suppressed things in you shall come alive too. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/3WP3a+

 In me, your future is bright and full of possibility.

 “Write, therefore, what you have seen, in a book.”

And at his word, John begun a new chapter of his life, writing… Words of comfort and revelation for seven churches and twenty one centuries.

* * *

Diocletian exiled you to Patmos, John, but Diocletian was not writing the story of your life, though he may have thought he was. He was but a pawn in the Grandmaster’s good strategy for your life.

You were exiled to barren Patmos out of fear and malice and the desire to control and neutralize you.

But that was exactly the plot Jesus permitted, to get you out of the way of ministry; out of the way of teaching; out of the way of adulation and followers and rapt listeners; out of the way of Simon who would buy your power, and James and Peter who might wonder who was the greatest.

This barren island, where no one wants to hear from you, no one wants to speak to you, where is there nothing to do and no voice to listen to but Christ’s, this place which seems an insane location for the man who knew Jesus better than any man did, the beloved disciple, for heaven’s sake, who could tell all the world about him– why would Jesus permit you, John, to be in Patmos?

Because you did have more to write, as it happened, and he had to get you quiet to hear his words, away from teaching or ministry or church planting, or trouble with the Romans, or trouble with the Jews, away from it all, away from the important necessary work of building a church that would be the hope of the world, to do something even more important.

To choose the better path.

To hear what the man with eyes like fire and a voice like the sound of running waters said, and to write it down in book.

* * *

Oh reader, does your life feel becalmed? As if all your bright dreams have come to nothing? Does the Empire run on without you, both the Kingdom of the World, and the Kingdom of Christ, while you are forgotten in Patmos.

You are not alone. He who sits upon the throne walks unseen beside you. Tweet: You are not alone. He who sits upon the throne walks unseen beside you. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/3e8HC+

Your future is bright, for he who is light itself can turn your trajectory around in a moment. Tweet: Your future is bright, for he who is light itself can turn your trajectory around in a moment. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/LB7eM+

 For every seismic change begins within. Tweet: Your future is bright, for he who is light itself can turn your trajectory around in a moment. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/LB7eM+

And while He chooses to let you stay exactly where you are in your dark season, he who is light itself will be for you light in the darkness. Tweet: He who is light itself will be for you light in the darkness. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/Y24IV+

* * *

Oh you who feel the sting of failure, do you know that being beaten and coming to the end of yourself are powerful things? Closed doors force you to look for the door that Jesus will open and no one can shut. Tweet: Closed doors force you to look for the door that Jesus will open and no one can shut. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/ft9a2+

Oh you who are well and truly defeated in what you set out to do, you who are well and truly out of energy, be of good cheer. You will now be forced to rely on a power beyond yourself for sustainable strategies…and this I know, his strategies will beat yours, any day, every way.

When everything seems to have ended, a new chapter can begin when you see the face of Jesus and hear the word of God to you. A new chapter will begin when you learn to work with the power of the Holy Spirit.

Be not afraid.

* * *

So you who are on Patmos, what do you do?

First of all, surrender the rest of your life to Jesus. Open your hands, and pour all the dreams and ambitions in them into his hands. Pour your health and your talents, your money and your resources, or the lack of them, all the things you have going for you, all the things you do NOT have going for you, into his hands

Do not dream of beginning a new chapter, a new project, a new enterprise without his direction.

Is your life too quiet? Do not fight the quietness. Tweet: Do not fight the quietness. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/Ni2gL+ Do not seek to make things noisier unless he tells you to.

Are you unknown, and unrecognised; are your words dormant within you? Ask him to give your words wings, to bring them to all those who will be blessed by them. Hand your career over to him as clay, asking him to fashion something beautiful, something lasting with it.

Train yourself to act not by might or by power, not by force or manipulation, but by God’s spirit. Tweet: Train yourself to act not by might or by power, not by force or manipulation, but by God’s spirit. @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/1aNU0+ Ask God to teach you to work with the power of the Holy Spirit.

When you think it’s all over, and you think you’ve failed, and are on a downward spiral, too old to do anything new, beautiful or important, get quiet on your Patmos, for as many days or weeks as it takes, until the noise of the outer world blows away.

Get quiet, Beloved Failure; listen hard for the one with blazing eyes, with a voice like a trumpet.

The answer may come immediately, or in the ten days it took the prophet Jeremiah to hear the word of the Lord. Or longer.

Then do what he tells you.

It may be that when everything is lost, he will speak, he will whisper, whisper softly in your ear. Stage directions that you really need to hear.

And all your past will be an insignificant chapter compared to the great chapters he is now going to write in your life, you and he together.

And all the words you have written will fade into insignificance compared to the words you will write, as he whispers softly in your ear.

He saves the best for last.

And if he says so, “write everything you have seen in a book.” (Revelation 1:11)

* * *

Tweetables

When you feel everything is dead, lost & over, but God suggests a new beginning. From @anitamathias1 Tweet: When you feel everything is dead, lost & over, but God suggests a new beginning. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/ej6mH+

As we listen to God, the trajectory of our lives can turn around in a moment. From @anitamathias1 Tweet: As we listen to God, the trajectory of our lives can turn around in a moment. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/db1Da+

When everything seems to have ended, a new chapter can begin when you hear the word of God to you. From @anitamathias1 Tweet: When everything seems to have ended, a new chapter can begin when you hear the word of God to you. @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/G576W+

Within the Alpha and the Omega, all words & all things are possible. From @anitamathias1Tweet: Within the Alpha and the Omega, all words & all things are possible. From @AnitaMathias1 http://ctt.ec/nAtax+

Image credit

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Filed Under: In which I decide to follow Jesus, In which I just keep Trusting the Lord Tagged With: guidance, John, new beginning, Patmos, Revelation, the rhema word of God, write what you see in a book

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Comments

  1. Ariel Paz says

    May 28, 2015 at 9:52 pm

    This post was so encouraging, Anita. Love the analogy of John on Patmos. Have actually visited that island and the church. You are so right. God does save the best till last.

    Keep looking up!
    Ariel

    • Anita Mathias says

      May 28, 2015 at 11:31 pm

      Thanks Ariel. I would love to visit Patmos some day 🙂

  2. Kimberly McKay says

    May 15, 2015 at 12:48 pm

    I adore this post – and thank you for bringing it to the world. I needed to hear this today.

    • Anita Mathias says

      May 21, 2015 at 3:13 pm

      Kimberly, thank you and welcome to my blog!

  3. Anita Mathias says

    May 15, 2015 at 11:28 am

    Thanks, David. I guess that insofar as it calms people down and puts them in a receptive frame of mind, God is OK with liturgy, but I can’t imagine He sees much value in reciting other people’s words rapidly if our thoughts and emotions are far away. 🙂

  4. Anita Mathias says

    May 12, 2015 at 2:51 pm

    Ah, how I need that too.
    Welcome to my blog, David!

    • David C Brown says

      May 13, 2015 at 11:40 am

      Thanks, still mooching around it!
      India is one of my great loves – see http://dcbindia.blogspot.co.uk/

      I can’t see where to comment on your “Liturgy” blog – but my question would be: does God like it? As I can’t see any justification of it in the Scriptures, and Jesus says, “But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as those who are of the nations: for they think they shall be heard through their much speaking” (Matthew 6: 7) I think not.

  5. David C Brown says

    May 12, 2015 at 11:55 am

    Fine and consoling; John went on to write the gospel after this, didn’t He? He had the experience of Jeus putting His right hand upon him.

  6. Anita Mathias says

    May 7, 2015 at 12:10 pm

    Thanks Constance. I loved your tulip post, BTW.
    I am in “exile” too in a way…good place in which one is forced to listen for God!

  7. Constance Morrison says

    May 6, 2015 at 9:07 pm

    I never thought about this before–the connection between John’s exile and the Revelation. I will look at the mini “exiles” of my life differently. Thanks, Anita!

  8. Don says

    May 6, 2015 at 6:14 pm

    This is so very appropriate for me right now. I’m at a crisis point in my career, but God is telling me that he is getting me ready for a renaissance. I’ve pasted your post into my journal. Thank you!

    • Anita Mathias says

      May 7, 2015 at 12:08 pm

      Thank you, Don. I just prayed that you will have inspiration as to what avenues to best pursue in your research, funding, staffing and career.

  9. Anita Mathias says

    May 6, 2015 at 8:55 am

    Susan, thank you. I spoke to my own heart too!!
    Blessings, Anita

  10. Susan Schiller says

    May 6, 2015 at 12:40 am

    If I could tell you how much” YES” resounds within me, to read John’s heart through your pen, Anita. Yes, you are speaking directly into my heart… thank you!

  11. Heather Coupland says

    May 5, 2015 at 9:49 am

    Oh my goodness ~ I have just sat down at my computer and read this and it is like an arrow going to the bullseye of my heart!!! I have had to give up everything I have been doing because of illness and feel this is a real time of transition for me. The one thing that has come up again and again is that I should write a book. I even have a publisher interested but have been dragging my feet because of everything else that has been going on. A couple of weeks ago some friends prayed for me not knowing about the book thing and one of them had a picture of me sitting writing ‘the anthem of your life’ and now today I read this. I must sharpen my pencils and start planning! Thank you Anita for bringing God’s prphetic word to me today x

    • Anita Mathias says

      May 6, 2015 at 8:55 am

      Thank you Heather for reading, and I am so glad it spoke to you.
      It spoke to me, even as I wrote it!
      Blessings on your writing.

  12. Bev Murrill says

    May 5, 2015 at 3:46 am

    Brilliant Anita, really brilliant! (the caterpillar thought the world was over – the butterfly knew better) Thanks for this post.

    • Anita Mathias says

      May 5, 2015 at 8:46 am

      Thanks so much, Bev. How are you? I hope your husband is doing well.

  13. Elizabeth Trotter says

    May 5, 2015 at 3:15 am

    I love your thoughts on John here! Love them. I only recently began to understand John in a new light, how it would have felt being still alive and exiled to Patmos, then receiving new and wondrous Revelation. Thank you for writing about it here! Love!

    • Anita Mathias says

      May 5, 2015 at 8:46 am

      Wow, thanks much,Elizabeth. I guess you are living through a mini-exile of your own, though a voluntary one.

  14. Kelly says

    May 5, 2015 at 1:51 am

    Beautiful words that spoke right to where I am at — thank you!

    • Anita Mathias says

      May 5, 2015 at 8:47 am

      Kelly, thank you, and welcome to my blog 🙂

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anita.mathias

Writer, Blogger, Reader, Mum. Christian. Instaing Oxford, travel, gardens and healthy meals. Oxford English alum. Writing memoir. Lives in Oxford, UK

Images from walks around Oxford. #beauty #oxford # Images from walks around Oxford. #beauty #oxford #walking #tranquility #naturephotography #nature
So we had a lovely holiday in the Southwest. And h So we had a lovely holiday in the Southwest. And here we are at one of the world’s most famous and easily recognisable sites.
#stonehenge #travel #england #prehistoric England #family #druids
And I’ve blogged https://anitamathias.com/2020/09/13/on-not-wasting-a-desert-experience/
So, after Paul the Apostle's lightning bolt encounter with the Risen Christ on the road to Damascus, he went into the desert, he tells us...
And there, he received revelation, visions, and had divine encounters. The same Judean desert, where Jesus fasted for forty days before starting his active ministry. Where Moses encountered God. Where David turned from a shepherd to a leader and a King, and more, a man after God’s own heart.  Where Elijah in the throes of a nervous breakdown hears God in a gentle whisper. 
England, where I live, like most of the world is going through a desert experience of continuing partial lockdowns. Covid-19 spreads through human contact and social life, and so we must refrain from those great pleasures. We are invited to the desert, a harsh place where pruning can occur, and spiritual fruitfulness.
A plague like this has not been known for a hundred years... John Piper, after his cancer diagnosis, exhorted people, “Don’t Waste Your Cancer”—since this was the experience God permitted you to have, and He can bring gold from it. Pandemics and plagues are permitted (though not willed or desired) by a Sovereign God, and he can bring life-change out of them. 
Let us not waste this unwanted, unchosen pandemic, this opportunity for silence, solitude and reflection. Let’s not squander on endless Zoom calls—or on the internet, which, if not used wisely, will only raise anxiety levels. Let’s instead accept the invitation to increased silence and reflection
Let's use the extra free time that many of us have long coveted and which has now been given us by Covid-19 restrictions to seek the face of God. To seek revelation. To pray. 
And to work on those projects of our hearts which have been smothered by noise, busyness, and the tumult of people and parties. To nurture the fragile dreams still alive in our hearts. The long-deferred duty or vocation
So, we are about eight weeks into lockdown, and I So, we are about eight weeks into lockdown, and I have totally sunk into the rhythm of it, and have got quiet, very quiet, the quietest spell of time I have had as an adult.
I like it. I will find going back to the sometimes frenetic merry-go-round of my old life rather hard. Well, I doubt I will go back to it. I will prune some activities, and generally live more intentionally and mindfully.
I have started blocking internet of my phone and laptop for longer periods of time, and that has brought a lot of internal quiet and peace.
Some of the things I have enjoyed during lockdown have been my daily long walks, and gardening. Well, and reading and working on a longer piece of work.
Here are some images from my walks.
And if you missed it, a blog about maintaining peace in the middle of the storm of a global pandemic
https://anitamathias.com/2020/05/04/a-mind-of-life-and-peace/  #walking #contemplating #beauty #oxford #pandemic
A few walks in Oxford in the time of quarantine. A few walks in Oxford in the time of quarantine.  We can maintain a mind of life and peace during this period of lockdown by being mindful of our minds, and regulating them through meditation; being mindful of our bodies and keeping them happy by exercise and yoga; and being mindful of our emotions in this uncertain time, and trusting God who remains in charge. A new blog on maintaining a mind of life and peace during lockdown https://anitamathias.com/2020/05/04/a-mind-of-life-and-peace/
In the days when one could still travel, i.e. Janu In the days when one could still travel, i.e. January 2020, which seems like another life, all four of us spent 10 days in Malta. I unplugged, and logged off social media, so here are some belated iphone photos of a day in Valetta.
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https://anitamathias.com/2020/04/06/on-yoga-and-following-jesus/
#valleta #valletamalta #travel #travelgram #uncagedbird
Images from some recent walks in Oxford. I am copi Images from some recent walks in Oxford.
I am coping with lockdown by really, really enjoying my daily 4 mile walk. By savouring the peace of wild things. By trusting that God will bring good out of this. With a bit of yoga, and weights. And by working a fair amount in my garden. And reading.
How are you doing?
#oxford #oxfordinlockdown #lockdown #walk #lockdownwalks #peace #beauty #happiness #joy #thepeaceofwildthings
Images of walks in Oxford in this time of social d Images of walks in Oxford in this time of social distancing. The first two are my own garden.  And I’ve https://anitamathias.com/2020/03/28/silver-and-gold-linings-in-the-storm-clouds-of-coronavirus/ #corona #socialdistancing #silverlinings #silence #solitude #peace
Trust: A Message of Christmas He came to earth in Trust: A Message of Christmas  He came to earth in a  splash of energy
And gentleness and humility.
That homeless baby in the barn
Would be the lynchpin on which history would ever after turn
Who would have thought it?
But perhaps those attuned to God’s way of surprises would not be surprised.
He was already at the centre of all things, connecting all things. * * *
Augustus Caesar issued a decree which brought him to Bethlehem,
The oppressions of colonialism and conquest brought the Messiah exactly where he was meant to be, the place prophesied eight hundred years before his birth by the Prophet Micah.
And he was already redeeming all things. The shame of unwed motherhood; the powerlessness of poverty.
He was born among animals in a barn, animals enjoying the sweetness of life, animals he created, animals precious to him.
For he created all things, and in him all things hold together
Including stars in the sky, of which a new one heralded his birth
Drawing astronomers to him.
And drawing him to the attention of an angry King
As angelic song drew shepherds to him.
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By a homeless baby
The still point on which the world still turns. The powerful centre. The only true power.
The One who makes connections. * * *
And there is no end to the wisdom, the crystal glints of the Message that birth brings.
To me, today, it says, “Fear not, trust me, I will make a way.” The baby lay gentle in the barn
And God arranges for new stars, angelic song, wise visitors with needed finances for his sustenance in the swiftly-coming exile, shepherds to underline the anointing and reassure his parents. “Trust me in your dilemmas,” the baby still says, “I will make a way. I will show it to you.” Happy Christmas everyone.  https://anitamathias.com/2019/12/24/trust-a-message-of-christmas/ #christmas #gemalderieberlin #trust #godwillmakeaway
Look, I’ve designed a journal. It’s an omnibus Look, I’ve designed a journal. It’s an omnibus Gratitude journal, habit tracker, food and exercise journal, bullet journal, with time sheets, goal sheets and a Planner. Everything you’d like to track.  Here’s a post about it with ISBNs https://anitamathias.com/2019/12/23/life-changing-journalling/. Check it out. I hope you and your kids like it!
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