Mixed Flock of birds flying in a V Formation- Put together- ©Creative Commons
I love writing and blogging: watching something shapely, and sometimes beautiful, emerge from a jumble of thoughts.
But there are many times when I just don’t feel like writing. My brain and spirit and fingers feel wooden. It is what Steven Pressfield calls “The Resistance.”
What helps then? Reading, reading a lot, ideally something like what I want to write, until the rhythm of words beats in my bloodstream, and ideas explode in my brain, and I yearn to get them out on the page.
* * *
And what when it comes to prayer, and I feel numb, a lifeless thing without joy, or love, or thought?
But I have made a commitment to pray, so pray I will.
I used to read scripture and read it until my heart said “Amen.”
I now practice eucharisteo–giving thanks for all the beautiful and lovely things in the world, and in my life.
I give thanks, and give thanks while the plane of my emotions slowly slides down the runway, and inches into the blue, sunny skies of praise and joy.
Read my new memoir: Rosaries, Reading, Secrets: A Catholic Childhood in India (US) or UK.
Connect on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/anitamathiaswriter/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/anita.mathias/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/AnitaMathias1
My book of essays: Wandering Between Two Worlds (US) or UK
Anita says
Thanks, Digital Nun. I grew up Catholic, and wanted to be a nun. I even spent 14 months as an aspirant and postulant at Mother Teresa's Convent.
I learned there the value of regular times of prayer, even when one feels as lifeless and emotionless as a stick.
It's then that I feel with Richard Foster that prayer feels not just like “a waste of time, but a waste of self.”
So I guess there is value in the relationship, in just showing up, whether the Loved One chooses to speak, or remain silent.
Thanks for visiting my blog.
Digitalnun says
When the well of prayer runs dry, one can also just remain quietly waiting, with no thought, no attempt even to give thanks, but a 'pure, naked intent unto God' as the author of the Cloud of Unknowing puts it. The prayer is in the intention, not in any act of will/expression of devotion/gratitude. Sometimes, even giving thanks is beyond us, isn't it?