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The Best Way to Develop Shiny New Habits

By Anita Mathias

 

Blogging almost daily for three and a half years has led to self-awareness. I have grown bored of boasting of my weaknesses.

There is a time for self-analysis, and a time for acting on that analysis, and that time came!  

And so I am in the process of developing shiny new habits. These are not yet jelled, but the trajectory is looking good.

* * *

The best way I know to form new habits is the most boring, but the most certain.

Start where you are. [Read more…]

Filed Under: In which I celebrate discipline Tagged With: decluttering, discipline, exercise, Gardening, habits, reading, waking early, writing

Two Difficult Things by December

By Anita Mathias

power_of_change_cropped

Alice laughed. “One can’t believe impossible things.

“I daresay you haven’t had much practice,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.“

Luckily, I have only two difficult things to do before January, but they are going to take all my focus for the rest of the year.

One is a pilgrimage in Tuscany in September, walking 8-14 miles a day. Since I am currently walking 4.5 miles most days, it will be a challenge! But not an impossible one! My reading (yeah, my first step to doing anything: buy a book!) suggests that one can, relatively easily, increase one’s total weekly mileage by 10 % each week, (and, with steady training, it is possible to go from couch to running a half marathon in six months) so I am optimistic that I will get there. Walking hills easily—um… um..

I think the only way I will be able to easily walk 8-14 miles a day in the hills of Tuscany in September (given my current fitness) is to take up running. Fortunately, I love running far more than walking. (I can’t run fast yet, alas, but running unleashes endorphins and endocannabinoids so that I return euphoric, happy, mentally clear, thinking positively, feeling optimistic and loving, with “calm of mind, all passion spent,” in Milton’s phrase.

In such a state of mind, one feels less need to manipulate one’s brain chemistry to find a high through the highly addictive salt, sugar, fat,  or chocolate which has been the bane of my life for so many years.

I am reading a fascinating book called The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg which talks about keystone habits. Implementing these unleashes a cascade of positive changes in people’s lives.

One of these keystone habits, unsurprisingly, is exercise. You end up eating better partly because you need to for your run, and partly because the endorphins your run generates means you need less “comfort food,”  and also because it’s hard to undo the effects of a run with a heavy, unhealthy meal. You think better, work better, and sleep better. The confidence generated by taking up challenging exercise spills over into work, relationships, adopting new challenges, etc.

* * *

The other difficult thing I plan to do by December is to complete my memoir of an Indian Catholic childhood, on which I have worked off and on for 15 years, though I more or less shelved it in 2006. But I feel uneasy and discontent until it is wrapped up, and now the time has come to do so.

I have signed with Darrell Vesterfelt of Prodigal Press, and my book will be published in April 2014. Which means I have to finish it by December. Which means serious hours of work.

I feel God has been beautifully stitching my life together. The running will help me be mentally fresh and physically capable of the hours at my desk that it’s going to take to finish this book by December.

I have a first draft of the book, but need the structure (turning in weekly chapters) and encouragement, editing and coaching that Darrell and Prodigal Press will provide to have it done by December.

* * *

I am meditating through the Gospel of Matthew at moment.

Repent for the Kingdom of God is near, (Matt 3:2). So the adult Jesus is introduced in the Gospel of John. Repent, a 180 degree turn from doing your own thing to living in the Kingdom, in the force field of God’s presence and power, doing things as God enables you.

I have had a very pleasant, though hedonistic holiday in Corfu, but now that I am home, discipline feels sweet to my soul.

Repenting, turning, returning. Back to a more disciplined way of eating, turning away from the pleasures of souvlaki, gyros, spanakopita, moussaka, baklava, and halwa to things which unequivocally bless my body, a plethora of fruits and veggies and beans and sprouts. (Roy is becoming a gourmet veggie cook, so don’t feel too sad for me).

No more staying up late, and sleeping in, but returning to a disciplined sleep/wake schedule. Early to bed!!

And lazy beach walks and desultory hikes will be replaced by determined 7-8 km run/walks. Am doing a 7 km race walk in Hyde Park on April 14th. Join me?

Ah, back to discipline. Reading, writing for long hours, with Pomodoro breaks every 25 minutes to tidy up, and the internet switched off with Antisocial and Stayfocusd, wonderful apps.

Discipline, anchored in the vine! If I try to be disciplined on my own strength, energy and enthusiasm, well, they soon peter out, but anchored in Jesus, with his sweet life flowing through me, ah, in that there is hope!!

What are your challenges for the rest of the year? Tell me!

Filed Under: In which I celebrate discipline Tagged With: discipline, exercise, running, Travel, writing

A Simple Organisation and Time-Management Strategy for Disciples of Jesus Christ

By Anita Mathias


 
As a young Christian, I (and my church) were influenced by World Harvest Mission’s Sonship Course. I went through it once with our pastor, Bob Hopper, and once with Paul Miller, who had co-written it.

I had not quite been in America for a decade then, and was still quite resistant to the way the American church conflated Christianity and the American way of maximum productivity. Very early on in Sonship, there was discussion of discipleship and daytimers (diaries). About how the battle to have quiet time with God was won or lost depending on when one went to bed the previous night. On the importance of organization.

There was this wonderful precept, “We all overestimate what we can do in the short run, and underestimate what we can do in the long run with the grace and power of God.”

Organization was presented an aspect of discipleship.

* * *

Roy and I were not organized. I, for instance, rarely bothered with calendars diaries or to do lists, preferring to keep things in my head. Which worked in the past, though now that life is very busy, I do need to write important things down!!

However, I have to say that the basic organizational strategy of ranking things according to their importance and urgency, and doing the most important (or urgent) first has begun to bring a sense of peace and harmony to our marriage.

* * *

 I have two mid-life reflections on this.

One is that is never too late to change. After a lifetime of being a messy, disorganized housekeeper and I am becoming tidier and more organized, week by week—as I set aside a weekly chunk of a few hours to put everything back in the right place, and get rid of everything I do not need, want or love.

The other is this: We need to be organised and disciplined in our use of time to be able to fulfil the destiny and calling God has for us. Without organisation, we are perhaps unlikely to make either our own dreams come true, or the plans God has for us.

Learning the basics of organisation and time-management is part of our calling to follow Jesus and be fruitful.

* * *

It’s amazing HOW MUCH the stress and the sense of being out of control has been alleviated by this simple tactic.
Each day make four lists,
A) Urgent, to be done that day, or in the next few days
B) Important
C) Good
D) Trivial.
First go through the urgent, then the important, the good and, last of all, the trivial.
Funny, after a few days of doing this, there is not much left on the urgent list, so we no longer bounce from crisis to crisis.

* * *

This famous story (from Evan Carmichael’s blog) illustrates the same point.

Ivy Ledbetter Lee  was a consultant for many business moguls of that time: Westinghouse, Lindbergh, Chrysler, and Charles M. Schwab. During his consultancy work for Bethlehem Steel, founded and run by Charles M. Schwab, Lee told Schwab, “”I can increase your people’s efficiency – and your sales – if you will allow me to spend fifteen minutes with each of your executives.” 

Schwab replied that what Bethlehem Steel employees needed was not to know more, but to work more… but asked Lee how much it would cost him. Lee said, “Nothing, unless it works. After three months, you can send me a check for whatever you feel it’s worth to you.”  

Thus a deal was made: in the span of about a ¼ of an hour, Lee was supposed to be able to give Schwab and his employees a method that would increase company effectiveness by at least 20-50%. 

Schwab called a meeting with his executives the next day. Once seated, Lee gave Schwab and the others a sheet of paper and told them to write down the six most important things they had to work on the next day. As they were writing them down, Lee instructed them to do number them in order of importance. 

Lee instructed those in the room further: they were to, each morning, pull out yesterday’s list and, at the beginning of their workday, and start working on Item 1 first. Once that was completed, they were to scratch that item out – and proceed to number 2 on the list, and so on – in order. He added that all were to read the list occasionally throughout the day, looking at the item to which they were currently attending.

 

 Lee told Schwab and his executives not to worry if they didn’t complete all tasks on their sheet for any certain day. It was only important that they work on the most important item first, then the next important, and so on – adding that, if this method didn’t improve efficiency, nothing would.

Lee finished up by telling Schwab and his employees to spend the last five minutes of every working day writing a new “must do” list for tomorrow’s tasks. They were to follow these steps every day for 90 days.

Lee called Schwab aside after he concluded the meeting and told him, “Try this method out for three months, then send me a check for whatever you think it was worth.”

Just a 15-minute meeting… and no more than 5 minutes a day for employees to write a list! 

A mere two weeks later, Schwab sent Lee a check for $25,000 (worth more than $400,000 in today’s dollars). He clipped a note to the check. In the note, Schwab told Lee that this was the most profitable business lesson he had ever learned – and that is saying something, considering that Schwab had, in earlier years, worked under financier J.P. Morgan! Over time, following this simple method, Schwab and his executives turned Bethlehem Steel into the biggest independent steel producer in the world, surpassing both U.S. Steel and Carnegie Steel, both for whom Schwab had been president prior to founding Bethlehem Steel. One simple method… and Schwab amassed a personal fortune of $100 million. 
The simple act of making prioritized lists is meant to increase productivity by 25%!!

Filed Under: In which I celebrate discipline Tagged With: discipline, Organization, Productivity, TIme Management

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  • Do Not Be Afraid, but Do Be Prudent
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  • Don’t Walk Away From Jesus, but if You Do, He Still Looks at You and Loves You
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Practicing the Way
John Mark Comer

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Olive Kitteridge
Elizabeth Strout

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The Long Loneliness:
The Autobiography of the Legendary Catholic Social Activist
Dorothy Day

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The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry:
How to stay emotionally healthy and spiritually alive in the chaos of the modern world
John Mark Comer

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Edna O'Brien

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My Latest Five Podcast Meditations

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anita.mathias

My memoir: Rosaries, Reading, Secrets https://amzn.to/42xgL9t
Oxford, England. Writer, memoirist, podcaster, blogger, Biblical meditation teacher, mum

Hi Friends, I have taped a meditation; do listen a Hi Friends, I have taped a meditation; do listen at this link: https://anitamathias.com/2025/04/08/the-kingdom-of-god-is-here-already-yet-not-yet-here-2/
It’s on the Kingdom of God, of which Christ so often spoke, which is here already—a mysterious, shimmering internal palace in which, in lightning flashes, we experience peace and joy, and yet, of course, not yet fully here. We sense the rainbowed presence of Christ in the song which pulses through creation. Christ strolls into our rooms with his wisdom and guidance, and things change. Our prayers are answered; we are healed; our hearts are strangely warmed. Sometimes.
And yet, we also experience evil within & all around us. Our own sin which can shatter our peace and the trajectory of our lives. And the sins of the world—its greed, dishonesty and environmental destruction.
But in this broken world, we still experience the glory of creation; “coincidences” which accelerate once we start praying, and shalom which envelops us like sudden sunshine. The portals into this Kingdom include repentance, gratitude, meditative breathing, and absolute surrender.
The Kingdom of God is here already. We can experience its beauty, peace and joy today through the presence of the Holy Spirit. But yet, since, in the Apostle Paul’s words, we do not struggle only “against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the unseen powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil,” its fullness still lingers…
Our daughter Zoe was ordained into the Church of E Our daughter Zoe was ordained into the Church of England in June. I have been on a social media break… but … better late than never. Enjoy!
First picture has my sister, Shalini, who kindly flew in from the US. Our lovely cousins Anthony and Sarah flank Zoe in the next picture.
The Bishop of London, Sarah Mullaly, ordained Zoe. You can see her praying that Zoe will be filled with the Holy Spirit!!
And here’s a meditation I’ve recorded, which you might enjoy. The link is also in my profile
https://anitamathias.com/2024/11/07/all-those-who-exalt-themselves-will-be-humbled-the-humble-will-be-exalted/
I have taped a meditation on Jesus statement in Ma I have taped a meditation on Jesus statement in Matthew 23, “For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
Do listen here. https://anitamathias.com/2024/11/07/all-those-who-exalt-themselves-will-be-humbled-the-humble-will-be-exalted/
Link also in bio.
And so, Jesus states a law of life. Those who broadcast their amazingness will be humbled, since God dislikes—scorns that, as much as people do.  For to trumpet our success, wealth, brilliance, giftedness or popularity is to get distracted from our life’s purpose into worthless activity. Those who love power, who are sure they know best, and who must be the best, will eventually be humbled by God and life. For their focus has shifted from loving God, doing good work, and being a blessing to their family, friends, and the world towards impressing others, being enviable, perhaps famous. These things are houses built on sand, which will crumble when hammered by the waves of old age, infirmity or adversity. 
God resists the proud, Scripture tells us—those who crave the admiration and power which is His alone. So how do we resist pride? We slow down, so that we realise (and repent) when sheer pride sparks our allergies to people, our enmities, our determination to have our own way, or our grandiose ego-driven goals, and ambitions. Once we stop chasing limelight, a great quietness steals over our lives. We no longer need the drug of continual achievement, or to share images of glittering travel, parties, prizes or friends. We just enjoy them quietly. My life is for itself & not for a spectacle, Emerson wrote. And, as Jesus advises, we quit sharp-elbowing ourselves to sit with the shiniest people, but are content to hang out with ordinary people; and then, as Jesus said, we will inevitably, eventually, be summoned higher to the sparkling conversation we craved. 
One day, every knee will bow before the gentle lamb who was slain, now seated on the throne. We will all be silent before him. Let us live gently then, our eyes on Christ, continually asking for his power, his Spirit, and his direction, moving, dancing, in the direction that we sense him move.
Link to new podcast in Bio https://anitamathias.co Link to new podcast in Bio https://anitamathias.com/2024/02/20/how-jesus-dealt-with-hostility-and-enemies/
3 days before his death, Jesus rampages through the commercialised temple, overturning the tables of moneychangers. Who gave you the authority to do these things? his outraged adversaries ask. And Jesus shows us how to answer hostile questions. Slow down. Breathe. Quick arrow prayers!
Your enemies have no power over your life that your Father has not permitted them. Ask your Father for wisdom, remembering: Questions do not need to be answered. Are these questioners worthy of the treasures of your heart? Or would that be feeding pearls to hungry pigs, who might instead devour you?
Questions can contain pitfalls, traps, nooses. Jesus directly answered just three of the 183 questions he was asked, refusing to answer some; answering others with a good question.
But how do we get the inner calm and wisdom to recognise
and sidestep entrapping questions? Long before the day of
testing, practice slow, easy breathing, and tune in to the frequency of the Father. There’s no record of Jesus running, rushing, getting stressed, or lacking peace. He never spoke on his own, he told us, without checking in with the Father. So, no foolish, ill-judged statements. Breathing in the wisdom of the Father beside and within him, he, unintimidated, traps the trappers.
Wisdom begins with training ourselves to slow down and ask
the Father for guidance. Then our calm minds, made perceptive, will help us recognise danger and trick questions, even those coated in flattery, and sidestep them or refuse to answer.
We practice tuning in to heavenly wisdom by practising–asking God questions, and then listening for his answers about the best way to do simple things…organise a home or write. Then, we build upwards, asking for wisdom in more complex things.
Listening for the voice of God before we speak, and asking for a filling of the Spirit, which Jesus calls streams of living water within us, will give us wisdom to know what to say, which, frequently, is nothing at all. It will quieten us with the silence of God, which sings through the world, through sun and stars, sky and flowers.
Especially for @ samheckt Some very imperfect pi Especially for @ samheckt 
Some very imperfect pictures of my labradoodle Merry, and golden retriever Pippi.
And since, I’m on social media, if you are the meditating type, here’s a scriptural meditation on not being afraid, while being prudent. https://anitamathias.com/2024/01/03/do-not-be-afraid-but-do-be-prudent/
A new podcast. Link in bio https://anitamathias.c A new podcast. Link in bio
https://anitamathias.com/2024/01/03/do-not-be-afraid-but-do-be-prudent/
Do Not Be Afraid, but Do Be Prudent
“Do not be afraid,” a dream-angel tells Joseph, to marry Mary, who’s pregnant, though a virgin, for in our magical, God-invaded world, the Spirit has placed God in her. Call the baby Jesus, or The Lord saves, for he will drag people free from the chokehold of their sins.
And Joseph is not afraid. And the angel was right, for a star rose, signalling a new King of the Jews. Astrologers followed it, threatening King Herod, whose chief priests recounted Micah’s 600-year-old prophecy: the Messiah would be born in Bethlehem, as Jesus had just been, while his parents from Nazareth registered for Augustus Caesar’s census of the entire Roman world. 
The Magi worshipped the baby, offering gold. And shepherds came, told by an angel of joy: that the Messiah, a saviour from all that oppresses, had just been born.
Then, suddenly, the dream-angel warned: Flee with the child to Egypt. For Herod plans to kill this baby, forever-King.
Do not be afraid, but still flee? Become a refugee? But lightning-bolt coincidences verified the angel’s first words: The magi with gold for the flight. Shepherds
telling of angels singing of coming inner peace. Joseph flees.
What’s the difference between fear and prudence? Fear is being frozen or panicked by imaginary what-ifs. It tenses our bodies; strains health, sleep and relationships; makes us stingy with ourselves & others; leads to overwork, & time wasted doing pointless things for fear of people’s opinions.
Prudence is wisdom-using our experience & spiritual discernment as we battle the demonic forces of this dark world, in Paul’s phrase.It’s fighting with divinely powerful weapons: truth, righteousness, faith, Scripture & prayer, while surrendering our thoughts to Christ. 
So let’s act prudently, wisely & bravely, silencing fear, while remaining alert to God’s guidance, delivered through inner peace or intuitions of danger and wrongness, our spiritual senses tuned to the Spirit’s “No,” his “Slow,” his “Go,” as cautious as a serpent, protected, while being as gentle as a lamb among wolves.
Link to post with podcast link in Bio or https://a Link to post with podcast link in Bio or https://anitamathias.com/2023/09/22/dont-walk-away-from-jesus-but-if-you-do-he-still-looks-at-you-and-loves-you/
Jesus came from a Kingdom of voluntary gentleness, in which
Christ, the Lion of Judah, stands at the centre of the throne in the guise of a lamb, looking as if it had been slain. No wonder his disciples struggled with his counter-cultural values. Oh, and we too!
The mother of the Apostles James and John, asks Jesus for a favour—that once He became King, her sons got the most important, prestigious seats at court, on his right and left. And the other ten, who would have liked the fame, glory, power,limelight and honour themselves are indignant and threatened.
Oh-oh, Jesus says. Who gets five talents, who gets one,
who gets great wealth and success, who doesn’t–that the
Father controls. Don’t waste your one precious and fleeting
life seeking to lord it over others or boss them around.
But, in his wry kindness, he offers the ambitious twelve
and us something better than the second or third place.
He tells us how to actually be the most important person to
others at work, in our friend group, social circle, or church:Use your talents, gifts, and energy to bless others.
And we instinctively know Jesus is right. The greatest people in our lives are the kind people who invested in us, guided us and whose wise, radiant words are engraved on our hearts.
Wanting to sit with the cleverest, most successful, most famous people is the path of restlessness and discontent. The competition is vast. But seek to see people, to listen intently, to be kind, to empathise, and doors fling wide open for you, you rare thing!
The greatest person is the one who serves, Jesus says. Serves by using the one, two, or five talents God has given us to bless others, by finding a place where our deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet. By writing which is a blessing, hospitality, walking with a sad friend, tidying a house.
And that is the only greatness worth having. That you yourself,your life and your work are a blessing to others. That the love and wisdom God pours into you lives in people’s hearts and minds, a blessing
https://anitamathias.com/.../dont-walk-away-from-j https://anitamathias.com/.../dont-walk-away-from-jesus.../
Sharing this podcast I recorded last week. LINK IN BIO
So Jesus makes a beautiful offer to the earnest, moral young man who came to him, seeking a spiritual life. Remarkably, the young man claims that he has kept all the commandments from his youth, including the command to love one’s neighbour as oneself, a statement Jesus does not challenge.
The challenge Jesus does offers him, however, the man cannot accept—to sell his vast possessions, give the money to the poor, and follow Jesus encumbered.
He leaves, grieving, and Jesus looks at him, loves him, and famously observes that it’s easier for a camel to squeeze through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to live in the world of wonders which is living under Christ’s kingship, guidance and protection. 
He reassures his dismayed disciples, however, that with God even the treasure-burdened can squeeze into God’s kingdom, “for with God, all things are possible.”
Following him would quite literally mean walking into a world of daily wonders, and immensely rich conversation, walking through Israel, Lebanon, Syria, and Jordan, quite impossible to do with suitcases and backpacks laden with treasure. 
For what would we reject God’s specific, internally heard whisper or directive, a micro-call? That is the idol which currently grips and possesses us. 
Not all of us have great riches, nor is money everyone’s greatest temptation—it can be success, fame, universal esteem, you name it…
But, since with God all things are possible, even those who waver in their pursuit of God can still experience him in fits and snatches, find our spirits singing on a walk or during worship in church, or find our hearts strangely warmed by Scripture, and, sometimes, even “see” Christ stand before us. 
For Christ looks at us, Christ loves us, and says, “With God, all things are possible,” even we, the flawed, entering his beautiful Kingdom.
https://anitamathias.com/2023/09/07/how-to-find-th https://anitamathias.com/2023/09/07/how-to-find-the-freedom-of-forgiveness/
How to Find the Freedom of Forgiveness
Letting go on anger and forgiving is both an emotional transaction & a decision of the will. We discover we cannot command our emotions to forgive and relinquish anger. So how do we find the space and clarity of forgiveness in our mind, spirit & emotions?
When tormenting memories surface, our cortisol, adrenaline, blood pressure, and heart rate all rise. It’s good to take a literally quick walk with Jesus, to calm this neurological and physiological storm. And then honestly name these emotions… for feelings buried alive never die.
Then, in a process called “the healing of memories,” mentally visualise the painful scene, seeing Christ himself there, his eyes brimming with compassion. Ask Christ to heal the sting, to draw the poison from these memories of experiences. We are caterpillars in a ring of fire, as Martin Luther wrote--unable to rescue ourselves. We need help from above.
Accept what happened. What happened, happened. Then, as the Apostle Paul advises, give thanks in everything, though not for everything. Give thanks because God can bring good out of the swindle and the injustice. Ask him to bring magic and beauty from the ashes.
If, like the persistent widow Jesus spoke of, you want to pray for justice--that the swindler and the abusers’ characters are revealed, so many are protected, then do so--but first, purify your own life.
And now, just forgive. Say aloud, I forgive you for … You are setting a captive free. Yourself. Come alive. Be free. 
And when memories of deep injuries arise, say: “No. No. Not going there.” Stop repeating the devastating story to yourself or anyone else. Don’t waste your time & emotional energy, nor let yourself be overwhelmed by anger at someone else’s evil actions. Don’t let the past poison today. Refuse to allow reinjury. Deliberately think instead of things noble, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy.
So keep trying, in obedience, to forgive, to let go of your anger until you suddenly realise that you have forgiven, and can remember past events without agitation. God be with us!
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