Anita Mathias: Dreaming Beneath the Spires

Anita Mathias's Blog on Faith and Art

To Be Wise on Social Media

By

 

 

We saw, yesterday, the surreal spectacle of the entire might of Boston Police Dept., hundreds of officers, hunting down  Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, a lone 19 year old teenager, whose murders and maimings at the Marathon and later were unquestionably evil.

 

But I found myself thinking of a terrified fox, its heart bursting with exhaustion, followed by a hunt, tireless men on horses, with well rested dogs. Obviously, I didn’t want more murders, but with the human instinct to side with the underdog, I thought of his terror, felt sorry for him, and found myself praying for him.

My laptop was at hand, so I tweeted, “Let’s also pray for Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, a misguided, terrified Chechen boy hunted by the entire might of the US!”

* * *

Oh my goodness! I was astonished by the reaction. I was characterized with filthy, filthy language I cannot bring myself to repeat; people hoped he would murder my family. People asked if I were crazy, suggested that I  …oh incredible, abusive language. (Interestingly, apparently the abusive people weren’t even following me, but saw retweets).

Roy said it was if I lobbed a hand grenade into a mob, and just stood there. He said, “You must have expected it.”

I honestly did not. If anyone’s hung out a lot with Jesus and his words, there is nothing astonishing about praying for an individual hunted by hundreds. If this were a movie, presumably people would be crossing their fingers for him. It’s praying for our enemies; it’s what keeps us balanced and human and keeps our angry, limited hearts sane. Yes, praying for your enemies—it keeps you sane, and keeps your heart sweet.

I deleted the tweet within ten minutes, but it had been retweeted, and so I got some abuse for hours. Block. Block. Block. Delete. Delete. Delete.

* * *

What stuns me most is that I honestly did not see it coming. Would I have tweeted it if I did? Not directly, no. Who wants to expose yourself to upset? But if I felt Christ wanted me to say it, I would have tweeted a direct quote from his words. Hey, you said it first, Jesus. Let them take it up with you.

* * *

Instead I prayed a different prayer (privately this time!). Lord, give me wisdom in social media.

And mentally slowed down, imagined myself kneeling before Jesus, imagined his hands on my head, my brain, and particles of his divine power coursing from his hands through my head, through my brain, changing it.

And I got up smiling, knowing my prayer had been answered. I would be wise in social media. Which doesn’t mean that I would be immune to anger and hostility and negativity and criticism on social media (or life)–for who is? It just that I would use words not carelessly or foolishly, but with wisdom, reflection, and deliberation, as a power for good (and then, one can withstand negativity).

My prayer would be answered, instantly—or gradually. Though it might need to be prayed again. And again.  

* * *

49 The royal official said, “Sir, come down before my child dies.”

50 “Go,” Jesus replied, “your son will live.”

The man took Jesus at his word and departed. 51 While he was still on the way, his servants met him with the news that his boy was living. 52 When he inquired as to the time when his son got better, they said to him, “Yesterday, at one in the afternoon, the fever left him.”

53 Then the father realized that this was the exact time at which Jesus had said to him, “Your son will live.” ” (John 4 49-53).

* * *

Taking Jesus at his word, the sublime simplicity of faith.

How easy it makes our spiritual lives. Ask and you shall receive. Ask, leave the package of desire in his hands, and go on your way.

For you have left it in very good hands.  “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. 15 And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.” (I John 5: 14-15)

And so, in simple faith, I know I will be wiser in social media.

 

Living in the Updraft of the Wild Goose of the Holy Spirit

By

Wild Geese fly in a V formation. The lead goose reduces the wind resistance; the others glide, almost effortlessly, in the currents she has created.

During a storm, the eagle waits perched on the edge of its nest for the wind to gain sufficient velocity. And then it spreads its wings wide and effortlessly glides into the winds of the storm.

* * *

 Have you ever seen hawks or eagles soar, wings outstretched, rising without a single beat of their enormous, magnificent wings, soaring, soaring? They are soaring on thermal currents—masses of air that rise when the ground rapidly warms up.

And sometimes, they soar on obstruction currents, when wind currents are deflected by mountains, cliffs or tall buildings. The resulting updraft lifts them to high altitudes at which they can glide.

* * *

 The Wild Goose was an emblem of the Holy Spirit in Celtic tradition. And the eagle, in Scripture, is a symbol both of God, and God’s people.

Eagles rarely waste their energy flapping their enormous wings—they soar on thermal currents, obstruction currents, and on the wings of the wind…

I have been reading about “the anointing,” in R. T. Kendall’s splendid book, “The Anointing.”

He writes: “the anointing is when our gift functions easily. It comes with ease. It seems natural. No working it up is needed. If one has to work it up, one has probably gone outside one’s anointing. If one goes outside one’s anointing, the result is often fatigue, that is weariness or spiritual lethargy that has been described as ‘dying inside.’”

* * *

 I find that with my writing on my blog, and indeed all writing. If I listen to what the Spirit is saying to me through the events of my life, record the mini-revelation or “revelations” given to me each day by the God who speaks continuously and is never silent (God is speaking. Not God spoke, but God is speaking. He is by His nature continuously articulate. A W Tozer) then blogging is quick, easy and delightful. And what’s more, it very often speaks to people.

But when I look at other people’s important mandarin posts, strategic posts that capture the zeitgeist and echo what everyone else is writing about, and wonder if I should go and do likewise that blogging feels heavy, a chore, work rather than play. Why? Because the wind of the Spirit is not helping me soar; I have to expend scarce energy with a mighty, exhausting flapping of wings.

There is a lightness to God’s work, an abounding creativity–tossing off creating zebras, giraffes, toucans, morpho butterflies or orchids. It is not fanciful to suppose that God was at play as these beautiful things came into being, step by step through the mighty forces of evolution. Work merging into delightful play.

* * *

 In his book, Homo Ludens, or Man the Player, the Dutch historian and cultural theorist, Johan Huizinga, suggests that culture stems from man at play, man simply playing with words, or music or paint or the sketches of mighty cathedrals.

And when I record the whispers of the spirit, write in the updraft of the wild goose of the Holy Spirit, blogging is easy, light and delightful. And I am playing in the fields of the Lord, thinking aloud, possibly, probably making mistakes–but oh, it is all such fun!!

 

 

 

Most Read Posts in 2012 on Dreaming Beneath the Spires

By

 

The High Cross at FFald-y-Brenin

1 When Christian celebrities fall, the proper response is mourning.

I had an extraordinary experience this summer. I heard an Anglican charismatic vicar Mark Stibbe give THE BEST sermon I ever heard—which was, oddly, on writing. He prayed for an impartation of the spiritual gift of writing, and I believe I received it. I came back full of excitement, and wrote much and well.

TEN days later, this man, genuinely insightful and spiritually gifted, leaves his wife and family for another woman, and leaves ALL ministry. His forthcoming book was cancelled.  I recently spent a couple of hours listening to his videos, and reading a book he’d written. Stibbe knows God, understands God. Oh, would the church find a way to extend grace to those who publicly fall, for all of us fall—privately. [Read more…]

Some Ways To Trick Yourself Into Writing When You Don’t Want To

By

Writing on a laptop with WiFi is so sub-optimal. There are myriad distractions. When, every Sunday, Rescue Time, an app I use, tells me how much time I have spent on Facebook, Twitter, other people’s blogs and online newspapers and journals—“consuming ideas,” and how much time writing—“creating,”-I am totally horrified.

* * *

 Anyway, here are a few ways I trick more writing out of myself.

1 Switch Between Two Pieces of Writing

Sometimes, when I think I am mentally tired, I am not really. My conscious has worked as much as it can on what I am writing. I am bored, or have hit a wall. I need to put it aside now for an hour or two to let my unconscious mull over it.

However, taking up a new piece of work will give me fresh energy and passion.

I find I definitely get more written if I can switch between two pieces of work.

2 Set a Timer

When I don’t feel like writing, feel sleepy, tired, lethargic, sluggish, then putting a timer for just 15 minutes, or just even 5, gets me going. The timer goes off and feels like an intrusion. I want to continue writing.

The trick with writing, as with exercise is just starting.

3 Take a Short Break

After a few days of serious work, my spirit protests. I feel as if I want a break. It really, really helps to just declare a Sabbath. I garden, I exercise, I tidy up, I pray. I watch a movie. The well refills. Inchoate thoughts jell. And then, after a few hours off, I am delighted to get back to work.

If, on the whole, you love writing, and occasionally really don’t want to write, don’t. Do other things, do something physical until the underground springs bubble up again like a geyser.

What are your favourite tricks for tricking writing out of yourself?

 

The Poet, the Albatross and the Christian

By

albatross wandering1

                                                                                                           The Albatross

Sometimes, to entertain themselves, the men of the crew
Lure upon deck an unlucky albatross, one of those vast
Birds of the sea that follow unwearied the voyage through,
Flying in slow and elegant circles above the mast.

No sooner have they disentangled him from their nets
Than this aerial colossus, shorn of his pride,
Goes hobbling pitiably across the planks and lets
His great wings hang like heavy, useless oars at his side.

How droll is the poor floundering creature, how limp and weak —
He, but a moment past so lordly, flying in state!
They tease him: One of them tries to stick a pipe in his beak;
Another mimics with laughter his odd lurching gait.

The Poet is like that wild inheritor of the cloud,
A rider of storms, above the range of arrows and slings;
Exiled on earth, at bay amid the jeering crowd,
He cannot walk for his unmanageable wings.

— George Dillon, Flowers of Evil (NY: Harper and Brothers, 1936)

 

We saw huge, white albatrosses glide on their giant wings in New Zealand in 2009. Aloft, in their native element, they are majestic, sublime.

Once captured, and mocked by sailors who force them to waddle on deck where their giant wings hamper their walk, as Baudelaire describes, they are piteous and comic. The gigantic wings which helped them soar are now comic impediments

* * *

 God designs an ideal medium, aerial, terrestrial, submarine, for each of us, and we are at home and happy when we are in it. God determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live (Acts 17:26). When we are in the right place, doing what we are meant to do, there is a sense of ease, a sense of soaring.

I have finally found this place. I am living in the town in which I have most longed to live, Oxford, with its heady combination of history, architecture, art, Christian and literary history, beauty, nature and stimulation.

I am beginning to get back into the work I most enjoy, creative prose, and am enjoying my blog. I am again enjoying reading. And I am enjoying the brainy, creative community in my church, St. Andrew’s, Oxford.

Of course, it took years for the pieces of the puzzle to fit together, and for me to discover work and a place which make me very happy.

Taking the time to discover the roles God has created us for, and the work which makes our souls sing—ah, these are worthwhile quests, for when we are doing the right work, and are in the right place and the right relationships, we can soar in the way we are designed to.

How about you? Have you discovered what you would like to make your life’s work? A church which permits your fullest flourishing? What are the dreams which God has placed in your heart, and are you able to work on them daily or weekly, at least a little?

What a string of personal questions! I’d love to hear your answers!

 

Invaluable Advice on Creativity for Bloggers and Poets from the Poet, William Stafford

By

stafford.jpg

I learnt this liberating writing tip from the poet, William Stafford, when he was a visiting writer at Ohio State University where I was doing a Masters in Creative Writing: You need to write the bad poems to get to the good poems. 

Get the bad poems out of the way; express the ideas however slight they might initially seem, for perhaps the idea you are conscious of is but the tip of the iceberg of the idea you are not conscious of. Write it down; sharpen your writing skills; improve your technique. And then you are ready for the good poems when they come.

If, however, you second-guess the poems: the subject is slight, it’s sentimental, it’s boring, it’s done before, it’s too abstract, too cliched–you become a critic, rather than a creator. More and more embryonic poems will have this shadow of judgement thrown over them. Your mind will become a self-cancelling system. Ideas will go from your mind to the waste-paper basket without ever having been written down.

And good poems may go this way too. You may begin to lose the confidence and self- belief to write them down.

William Stafford’s famous advice for dealing with writer’s block helps me as a blogger: to be willing to lower my standards. To be willing to write slight posts, express slight thoughts.

Then writing becomes as instinctive as breathing, my brain moves to my finger tips, and I keep current with the flow of my inner life and thoughts. Not being willing to post slight posts leads to perfectionism which as Ann Lamott says is the voice of the oppressor and the enemy of the people.

The willingness to fail. The willingness to take risks. The willingness to try something new, even if it is far below your usual standards. These are all essential elements of creativity.

And they keep blogging easy, pleasant and a joy, rather than one more self-imposed chore.

* * *

I love William Stafford’s liberating essay, A Way of Writing.

“A writer is not so much someone who has something to say as he is someone who has found a process that will bring about new things he would not have thought of if he had not started to say them. That is, he does not draw on a reservoir; instead, he engages in an activity that brings to him a whole succession of unforeseen stories, poems, essays, plays, laws, philosophies…

Back in school, from the first when I began to try to write things, I felt this richness. One thing would lead to another; the world would give and give. Now, after twenty years or so of trying, I live by that certain richness.

The importance of just plain receptivity… When I write, I like to have an interval before me when I am not likely to be interrupted. For me, this means usually the early morning, before others are awake.

I get pen and paper, take a glance out of the window (often it is dark out there), and wait. It is like fishing. But I do not wait very long, for there is always a nibble–and this is where receptivity comes in.

To get started I will accept anything that occurs to me. Something always occurs, of course, to any of us. We can’t keep from thinking. Maybe I have to settle for an immediate impression: it’s cold, or hot, or dark, or bright, or in between! If I put down something, that thing will help the next thing come, and I’m off. If I let the process go on, things will occur to me that were not at all in my mind when I started. These things, odd or trivial as they may be, are somehow connected. And if I let them string out, surprising things will happen.

If I let them string out…. Along with initial receptivity, then, there is another readiness: I must be willing to fail. If I am to keep on writing, I cannot bother to insist on high standards. I must get into action and not let anything stop me, or even slow me much.

By “standards” I do not mean “correctness” spelling, punctuation, and so on. These details become mechanical for anyone who writes for a while. I am thinking about such matters as social significance, positive values, consistency, etc…. I resolutely disregard these. Something better, greater, is happening!

I am following a process that leads so wildly and originally into new territory that no judgment can at the moment be made about values, significance, and so on. I am making something new, something that has not been judged before. Later others–and maybe I myself–will make judgments. Now, I am headlong to discover. Any distraction may harm the creating.

So, receptive, careless of failure, I spin out things on the page. And a wonderful freedom comes. If something occurs to me, it is all right to accept it. It has one justification: it occurs to me. No one else can guide me. I must follow my own weak, wandering, diffident impulses.

A strange bonus happens. At times, without my insisting on it, my writings become coherent; the successive elements that occur to me are clearly related. They lead by themselves to new connections.

Sometimes the language, even the syllables that happen along, may start a trend. Sometimes the materials alert me to something waiting in my mind, ready for sustained attention. At such times, I allow myself to be eloquent, or intentional, or for great swoops (Treacherous! Not to be trusted!) reasonable. But I do not insist on any of that; for I know that back of my activity there will be the coherence of my self, and that indulgence of my impulses will bring recurrent patterns and meanings again.

This attitude toward the process of writing creatively suggests a problem for me, in terms of what others say. They talk about “skills” in writing. Without denying that I do have experience, wide reading, automatic orthodoxies and manoeuvres of various kinds, I still must insist that I am often baffled about what “skill” has to do with the precious little area of confusion when I do not know what I am going to say and then I find out what I am going to say. That precious interval I am unable to bridge by skill.

What can I witness about it? It remains mysterious, just as all of us must feel puzzled about how we are so inventive as to be able to talk along through complexities with our friends, not needing to plan what we are going to say, but never stalled for long in our confident forward progress. Skill? If so, it is the skill we all have, something we must have learned before the age of three or four.

A writer is one who has become accustomed to trusting that grace, or luck, or–skill.”

 

Most Popular Posts in October on Dreaming Beneath the Spires

By

Doc5 new BLOG title script pdfAnd here are the most read posts this month on Dreaming Beneath the Spires. Sorry, a couple are a bit controversial!!

Trying to move my blog from Blogger to WordPress was my own private Hurricane, and I am now trying to get properly back into blogging!

1 On Vaughan Roberts’ Interview and the Case for Gay Christian Marriage.

 2 In which I Trace my Evolving Views on Gay Christians

3 When Christian Giants Stumble, the Proper Response is Mourning

(A September post, which was one of the most read posts in October!).

4 Blogging and Ambition: When you are NOT on a Best Blogger List

Stephen King’s Immensely Helpful Book “On Writing”

By

StephenKingGFDL

Stephen King (2007) credit

King’s short book, On Writing, figures in many writers’ lists of the best books on writing. And deservedly so. It has motivated  me to get my writing shoes on, and get writing.

I listened to it read by King himself on my iPod, while running—on pedestrian country footpaths, and, so far, with more luck than King whose lower leg broke in nine places, spine chipped in eight places, right knee split, right hip fractured, ribs broke, and scalp lacerated during a dreadful car accident while on a muse-wooing walk.

And in “the apocalyptic pain” after this, he continued writing, and writing proved a way back to life for him.

Here are Stephen King’s answers to universal writerly questions.

How much should a writer read?

King does not bother about being cool in this book on writing. So he will tell you prescriptive things that cool writers wouldn’t.

Read a lot. How much is a lot? I have kept lists of the books I’ve read each year since I was 12—and the most I’ve ever completed in a year was 62 (not counting academic books, which one reads rapidly, selectively). And probably another 25 or so on tape, on a good year for audiobooks. Of course, I am a promiscuous speed-reader, and buy many books (non-fiction or spiritual) with the intention of ripping the heart and marrow out of them, rather than reading every page.

Well, Stephen King reads or listens to 70-80 books a year, including about a dozen audiobooks.

King: “If you don’t have the time to read, you don’t have the time or the tools to write. It’s as simple as that.”

“Reading is the creative centre of a writer’s life.”

“The real importance of reading is that it creates an ease and intimacy with the process of writing. Constant reading will pull you into a place where you can write eagerly and without self-consciousness.”

How much should a writer write?

How many words a day? Another uncool question. Well, King aims at 2000 words every morning, with revisions and reading in the evening. Some days he’s done by 11.30 a.m., some days by 1.30 p.m., and sometimes, rarely, it takes till tea.

“For me, not writing is the real work. When I’m writing, it’s all the playground, and the worst three hours I ever spent there were still pretty damned good.”

He keeps fit with long walks–well, until recently.

On Criticism

His teacher asks him about an early attempt at Sci-fi, “What I don’t understand, Stevie, is why you’d write junk like this? You are talented. Why do you want to waste your abilities?

“I had no answer to give. I have spent a good many years since—too many—being ashamed about what I write. I was forty before I realized that almost every writer of fiction or poetry who has ever published a line has been accused by someone of wasting his God-given talent. If you write (or paint or sculpt) someone will try to make you feel lousy about it.”

On Revision

“When you write, you’re telling yourself the story. When you re-write, your main job is taking out all the things that are not the story.”

“Stopping a piece of work just because it is hard, either emotionally or imaginatively, is a bad idea. Sometimes, you have to go on when you don’t feel like it, and sometimes you’re doing good work when it feel like all you’re managing is to shovel shit from a sitting position.”

He does three drafts, the first getting it all down fast; the last one closer to polishing.

He uses this rigorous and enormously difficult formula:

Second Draft= First Draft -10%.

Other Writing Tips

“The biggest aid to regular writing is working in a serene atmosphere. It’s difficult for even the most naturally productive writer to work in an environment where alarms and excursions are the rule rather than the exception.”

Write with a locked door, no TV, games or internet.  “Eliminate every possible distraction.”

Secrets of his success: “I stayed physically healthy, and I stayed married. The converse is true: My writing and the pleasure I take in it have contributed to the stability of my health and home life.”

“Life isn’t a support system for art. It’s the other way around.”

“Skills in description, dialogue and character development all boil down to seeing or hearing clearly and then transcribing what you see or hear with equal clarity.”

Do you do it for the money, honey? he’s often asked. Answer, “No. Don’t now, and never did. I did it for the buzz. I did it for the pure joy of the thing. And if you can do it for joy, you can do it forever.”

And he discovers, after his debilitating accident, “Writing is not life, but sometimes, it can be a way back to life.”

Ah, and let me quote his beautiful last paragraphs,

“On some days, the writing is a pretty grim slog. On others, I feel that buzz of happiness, that sense of having found the right words and put them in a line. It’s like lifting off in an airplane: you are on the ground, on the ground, on the ground… and then you’re up, riding on a magical cushion and prince of all you survey. That makes me happy because it’s what I was made to do.

“After my accident, writing has continued to do what it has always doe: it makes my life a brighter and more pleasant place.”

“Writing isn’t about making money, getting famous, getting laid or making friends. It’s about enriching the lives of those who will read your work, and enriching your own life, as well. It’s about getting up, getting well, and getting over.”

“Getting happy, okay? Getting happy.”

“This book is a permission slip: you can, you should, and if you are brave enough to start, you will. Writing is magic, as much the water of life as any other creative art. The water is free. So drink.”

Drink and be filled up.”