Anita Mathias: Dreaming Beneath the Spires

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Archives for November 2012

7 Bits of Technology which have Enhanced my Life

By Anita Mathias

audible1 AntiSocial and Rescue Time

AntiSocial turns off the most distracting sites you specify for as long as you like, between 15 minutes to 8 hours. You cannot get on without rebooting your computer.

Rescue Time tracks your time usage through each day, and tells you how much time you spent actually writing, and how much on facebook, twitter, blogs, newspapers, magazines, websites. Try it.

The results are shocking. It also blocks every site it thinks distracting, but you can unblock it. If serious, use Antisocial as well. Both these have free versions, though I use paid versions.

My productivity has increased since I have started using them, though I still have WAY to go!

And, oh, the joy and peace of working with 100% focus!!

2 A pedometer.

I’d recommend my Omron pedometer. It tracks my daily steps, startling me with the realization of how sedentary I’ve become. 10,000 steps are meant to be optimal for physical health. I started building up at 4000 and have reached 7800 steps a day (and I need to walk outside for that; won’t get it in the course of my daily life!)

It’s changing my life. For instance, when we travel, we used to try to park as close to the museum or botanical garden or church as possible to save our strength for the attraction. Now, I don’t care where we park; it’s going to be challenging to get my 7900 steps anyway—which is about 4 miles! Similarly, if I haven’t got my goal steps by the night, I walk around tidying the house until I get my steps, and walk down with each stray item, instead of leaving them by the steps. You get the picture.

3 Audible.co.uk or Audible.com.

I’ve always loved audiobooks, and at times when I’ve been depressed, or low-energy, or ready to give up writing, they have helped me fall in love again with books, and words and writing.

Audiobooks help enormously with writing style, as you subliminally pick up style, rhythm and tone. Stylists, in particular, come to life on audiobooks—such as Toni Morrison, Salman Rushdie, Chang-Rae Lee or Kazuo Ishiguro.

I download Audible books to my iPhone, and play them from my pocket as I walk around the house, or walk outside. I probably listen to more books than I read as I use fallow time to do so.

Our family subscribes to the 24 book plan, for £110, about 4.58 a book. Not dirt-cheap, but not expensive either if you consider the pleasure a book gives you.

4 Satnav—We got ours a few years ago, and it’s magic. We go to Europe a lot, and really enjoy driving without continually looking at maps or getting lost.

Well, the satnav does get us a bit lost, sometimes, or into  “no-drive without permit” zones, but basically, the pleasure of being able to get step by step driving directions in unfamiliar medieval cities or metropolises—for that I could forgive my satnav a lot.

5 MiFi—A little gadget that creates a portable hotspot wherever I am, so that I gets fast WiFi on the go. It certainly makes travel more fun, as I love researching things, and, besides, don’t have to be parted from my blog or my social media networks of friends and acquaintances when on the hoof. It’s an amazing thing. Ours is from 3 and costs £9 a month. We recommend the gadget and company.

6 I use a little worship timer which I bought from Catch the Fire which beeps every ten minutes and reminds me to pray and be thankful. It keeps me positive, happier, and far more energetic. Brother Lawrence would have loved it, I think.

7 My iPhone.

I’ve had it since 2009, and it still seems magical to me—a phone, a camera, iPod, email, facebook, twitter… It also has the Runkeeper app which tells me the speed at which I am running, or not running; my Bible on text and audio, and audiobooks. Amazing. All this is a sleek palm sized gadget. I totally understand the outpouring of grief at the death of Steve Jobs.

8 Other favourite bits of technology—my laptop, and digital camera. I might have added my iPad and my Kindle, except that daughter number 2 and 1 stole each of these on the day they entered the house, and I’ve hardly been on them. Perhaps I’ll recapture them before my next tech update!

What are your favourite gadgets and apps? I.e. what should I ask for for Christmas?

Filed Under: random Tagged With: Antisocial, Audible, iPhone, mifi, pedometer, praise timer, rescuetime, satnav

The Poet, the Albatross and the Christian

By Anita Mathias

albatross wandering1

                                                                                                           The Albatross

Sometimes, to entertain themselves, the men of the crew
Lure upon deck an unlucky albatross, one of those vast
Birds of the sea that follow unwearied the voyage through,
Flying in slow and elegant circles above the mast.

No sooner have they disentangled him from their nets
Than this aerial colossus, shorn of his pride,
Goes hobbling pitiably across the planks and lets
His great wings hang like heavy, useless oars at his side.

How droll is the poor floundering creature, how limp and weak —
He, but a moment past so lordly, flying in state!
They tease him: One of them tries to stick a pipe in his beak;
Another mimics with laughter his odd lurching gait.

The Poet is like that wild inheritor of the cloud,
A rider of storms, above the range of arrows and slings;
Exiled on earth, at bay amid the jeering crowd,
He cannot walk for his unmanageable wings.

— George Dillon, Flowers of Evil (NY: Harper and Brothers, 1936)

 

We saw huge, white albatrosses glide on their giant wings in New Zealand in 2009. Aloft, in their native element, they are majestic, sublime.

Once captured, and mocked by sailors who force them to waddle on deck where their giant wings hamper their walk, as Baudelaire describes, they are piteous and comic. The gigantic wings which helped them soar are now comic impediments

* * *

 God designs an ideal medium, aerial, terrestrial, submarine, for each of us, and we are at home and happy when we are in it. God determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live (Acts 17:26). When we are in the right place, doing what we are meant to do, there is a sense of ease, a sense of soaring.

I have finally found this place. I am living in the town in which I have most longed to live, Oxford, with its heady combination of history, architecture, art, Christian and literary history, beauty, nature and stimulation.

I am beginning to get back into the work I most enjoy, creative prose, and am enjoying my blog. I am again enjoying reading. And I am enjoying the brainy, creative community in my church, St. Andrew’s, Oxford.

Of course, it took years for the pieces of the puzzle to fit together, and for me to discover work and a place which make me very happy.

Taking the time to discover the roles God has created us for, and the work which makes our souls sing—ah, these are worthwhile quests, for when we are doing the right work, and are in the right place and the right relationships, we can soar in the way we are designed to.

How about you? Have you discovered what you would like to make your life’s work? A church which permits your fullest flourishing? What are the dreams which God has placed in your heart, and are you able to work on them daily or weekly, at least a little?

What a string of personal questions! I’d love to hear your answers!

 

Filed Under: In which I Dream Beneath the Spires of Oxford, In which I explore writing and blogging and creativity, In which I play in the fields of poetry, Writing and Blogging Tagged With: Baudelaire, blogging, Oxford, Poetry, writing

Six Reflections on Spiritual Growth

By Anita Mathias

 

acorn oak

Image credit

 

Then Jesus asked, “What is the kingdom of God like? What shall I compare it to? 19 It is like a mustard seed, which a man took and planted in his garden. It grew and became a tree, and the birds perched in its branches.”

 

20 Again he asked, “What shall I compare the kingdom of God to? 21 It is like yeast that a woman took and mixed into about sixty poundsa of flour until it worked all through the dough.” Luke 13

 

1 Spiritual growth is gradual, incremental and, in the short run, invisible. Even if we sat watching the mustard seed or the yeast all day, we would not be able to pinpoint their growth or rising.

 

Similarly, we cannot gauge our own spiritual growth as it is occurring. But we should be able to look back to who we were at the start of our journeys, and realize that the Spirit of the LORD has come upon us, and we have been changed into a different person. (1 Sam 10:6).

 

2 We cannot control our own spiritual growth.

 

Human effort cannot neither produce yeast and the mustard seed nor control their growth. All we can do is provide favourable conditions.

 

Once we have asked Jesus and the Holy Spirit into our hearts, as long as we are repenting of any known sin, we can leave the pace of our spiritual growth to him.

 

3 Spiritual growth is uneven, and that’s okay. Growth rings in ancient trees show there is rapid growth in the growing season, alternating with slow growth in winter. Cold years, or years of drought leave narrow rings behind.

 

We don’t always live on the heights, spiritually. We would burn out. Highs and lows, summer and winter are built into creation—and into our spiritual lives. Sometimes God takes us through periods of intense spiritual growth and change, and sometimes through slower periods of consolidation.

 

4 We each have unique spiritual trajectories

 

Homemade yeast bread tastes slightly different each time. So too, the spirit works uniquely in each individual, convicting us of different things at conversion, and throughout our lives. We grow at different paces. Some make rapid, seismic changes at conversion. Others, like me, change slowly throughout our Christian lives, though occasionally suffering, or seeking God, intensely leads to intense change.

 

5 The most powerful things in the spiritual life are often invisible–like prayer and like surrender. In fact, we are told our spiritual activities—prayer, giving, fasting– are more powerful, more blessed and more rewarded when they are secret. (Matthew 6 1-6).

 

Invisible things, like the yeast in bread, or the seed in the earth have a disproportionate influence in the spiritual life.  About one percent of a loaf of bread is yeast, and it is indistinguishable from flour, but it makes the entire loaf light. It is analogous to the power of prayer, the secret roots beneath a life, which gives us good ideas, strength, and grace, divine enablement. Secret prayer makes the difference between a life filled with blessing, joy and peace, and a more mediocre Christian life.

 

6 One’s trajectory is more important than where one currently is since the Kingdom of God, rising yeast and growing mustard trees are works in progress.

 

There is this repeated phrase in Kings and Samuel: The House of David grew stronger and stronger, while the house of Saul grew weaker and weaker. And David became more and more powerful, because the LORD God Almighty was with him. (2 Sam 3:2)

 

As long as the mustard seed, the yeast of the Kingdom of God dwells within us, and we are providing them favourable conditions, we can relax, and God will ensure growth.

 

Because growth is invisible, when discouraged, we need to look at our trajectory, and compare ourselves to where we were five years ago, one year ago.

 

And when tempted to judge another Christian, we need to remember that we are all works in progress, the yeast is rising, the mustard seed is growing in each of our lives, and we have not yet seen the end of the story.

 

 

 

Filed Under: In which I explore the Spiritual Life, In which I play in the fields of Scripture Tagged With: Luke. Parables, mustard seed, spiritual growth, yeast

Invaluable Advice on Creativity for Bloggers and Poets from the Poet, William Stafford

By Anita Mathias

stafford.jpg

I learnt this liberating writing tip from the poet, William Stafford, when he was a visiting writer at Ohio State University where I was doing a Masters in Creative Writing: You need to write the bad poems to get to the good poems. 

Get the bad poems out of the way; express the ideas however slight they might initially seem, for perhaps the idea you are conscious of is but the tip of the iceberg of the idea you are not conscious of. Write it down; sharpen your writing skills; improve your technique. And then you are ready for the good poems when they come.

If, however, you second-guess the poems: the subject is slight, it’s sentimental, it’s boring, it’s done before, it’s too abstract, too cliched–you become a critic, rather than a creator. More and more embryonic poems will have this shadow of judgement thrown over them. Your mind will become a self-cancelling system. Ideas will go from your mind to the waste-paper basket without ever having been written down.

And good poems may go this way too. You may begin to lose the confidence and self- belief to write them down.

William Stafford’s famous advice for dealing with writer’s block helps me as a blogger: to be willing to lower my standards. To be willing to write slight posts, express slight thoughts.

Then writing becomes as instinctive as breathing, my brain moves to my finger tips, and I keep current with the flow of my inner life and thoughts. Not being willing to post slight posts leads to perfectionism which as Ann Lamott says is the voice of the oppressor and the enemy of the people.

The willingness to fail. The willingness to take risks. The willingness to try something new, even if it is far below your usual standards. These are all essential elements of creativity.

And they keep blogging easy, pleasant and a joy, rather than one more self-imposed chore.

* * *

I love William Stafford’s liberating essay, A Way of Writing.

“A writer is not so much someone who has something to say as he is someone who has found a process that will bring about new things he would not have thought of if he had not started to say them. That is, he does not draw on a reservoir; instead, he engages in an activity that brings to him a whole succession of unforeseen stories, poems, essays, plays, laws, philosophies…

Back in school, from the first when I began to try to write things, I felt this richness. One thing would lead to another; the world would give and give. Now, after twenty years or so of trying, I live by that certain richness.

The importance of just plain receptivity… When I write, I like to have an interval before me when I am not likely to be interrupted. For me, this means usually the early morning, before others are awake.

I get pen and paper, take a glance out of the window (often it is dark out there), and wait. It is like fishing. But I do not wait very long, for there is always a nibble–and this is where receptivity comes in.

To get started I will accept anything that occurs to me. Something always occurs, of course, to any of us. We can’t keep from thinking. Maybe I have to settle for an immediate impression: it’s cold, or hot, or dark, or bright, or in between! If I put down something, that thing will help the next thing come, and I’m off. If I let the process go on, things will occur to me that were not at all in my mind when I started. These things, odd or trivial as they may be, are somehow connected. And if I let them string out, surprising things will happen.

If I let them string out…. Along with initial receptivity, then, there is another readiness: I must be willing to fail. If I am to keep on writing, I cannot bother to insist on high standards. I must get into action and not let anything stop me, or even slow me much.

By “standards” I do not mean “correctness” spelling, punctuation, and so on. These details become mechanical for anyone who writes for a while. I am thinking about such matters as social significance, positive values, consistency, etc…. I resolutely disregard these. Something better, greater, is happening!

I am following a process that leads so wildly and originally into new territory that no judgment can at the moment be made about values, significance, and so on. I am making something new, something that has not been judged before. Later others–and maybe I myself–will make judgments. Now, I am headlong to discover. Any distraction may harm the creating.

So, receptive, careless of failure, I spin out things on the page. And a wonderful freedom comes. If something occurs to me, it is all right to accept it. It has one justification: it occurs to me. No one else can guide me. I must follow my own weak, wandering, diffident impulses.

A strange bonus happens. At times, without my insisting on it, my writings become coherent; the successive elements that occur to me are clearly related. They lead by themselves to new connections.

Sometimes the language, even the syllables that happen along, may start a trend. Sometimes the materials alert me to something waiting in my mind, ready for sustained attention. At such times, I allow myself to be eloquent, or intentional, or for great swoops (Treacherous! Not to be trusted!) reasonable. But I do not insist on any of that; for I know that back of my activity there will be the coherence of my self, and that indulgence of my impulses will bring recurrent patterns and meanings again.

This attitude toward the process of writing creatively suggests a problem for me, in terms of what others say. They talk about “skills” in writing. Without denying that I do have experience, wide reading, automatic orthodoxies and manoeuvres of various kinds, I still must insist that I am often baffled about what “skill” has to do with the precious little area of confusion when I do not know what I am going to say and then I find out what I am going to say. That precious interval I am unable to bridge by skill.

What can I witness about it? It remains mysterious, just as all of us must feel puzzled about how we are so inventive as to be able to talk along through complexities with our friends, not needing to plan what we are going to say, but never stalled for long in our confident forward progress. Skill? If so, it is the skill we all have, something we must have learned before the age of three or four.

A writer is one who has become accustomed to trusting that grace, or luck, or–skill.”

 

Filed Under: In which I explore writing and blogging and creativity, Writing and Blogging Tagged With: "A Way of Writing", blogging, William Stafford, writing

The Risk of Birth, An Advent Poem by Madeleine L’Engle

By Anita Mathias

This is no time for a child to be born,
With the earth betrayed by war & hate
And a comet slashing the sky to warn
That time runs out & the sun burns late.

That was no time for a child to be born,
In a land in the crushing grip of Rome;
Honour & truth were trampled by scorn-
Yet here did the Saviour make his home.

When is the time for love to be born?
The inn is full on the planet earth,
And by a comet the sky is torn-
Yet Love still takes the risk of birth.

Filed Under: random

When Dreams Come True: Or Martin Luther King’s Dream Was Not Wild Enough

By Anita Mathias

As a teenager, the American Jesuits at Xavier Labour Relations Institute, Jamshedpur, where my father taught, lent me an anthology of Great American Speeches to prepare for elocution competions. And so I memorized Frederick Douglass’ brilliant, “What to the slave is the Fourth of July,” (1854) and Martin Luther King’s equally brilliant, “I have a dream” which has been ringing in my ears this week.

* * *

 In 1963, 49 years ago, Martin Luther King addressed 250,000 civil rights supporters from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial.

We’ve come to our nation’s capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the “unalienable Rights” of “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note, insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked “insufficient funds.”

But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. And so, we’ve come to cash this check .

And 45 years later, by electing and re-electing a Black President to the White House, American made reality of a dream beyond King’s very, very modest dream, which he described:

I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.”

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

 I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today!

I have a dream that one day, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today!

 * * *

To me, as a minority American citizen (I lived there for 17 years!) watching from England, the 2008 and 2012 elections were profoundly redemptive. Like many people, I could hardly hold back my tears.

I watched America toss into the dustbin of history the shameful legacy of slavery, which Frederick Douglass graphically described in his great speech “The Meaning of July Fourth for the Negro” “What, am I to argue that it is wrong to make men brutes, to rob them of their liberty, to work them without wages, to keep them ignorant of their relations to their fellow men, to beat them with sticks, to flay their flesh with the lash, to load their limbs with irons, to hunt them with dogs, to sell them at auction, to sunder their families, to knock out their teeth, to burn their flesh, to starve them into obedience and submission to their mastcrs? Must I argue that a system thus marked with blood, and stained with pollution, is wrong?” 

I watched white men and women, along with black men and women who had been legally discriminated against in the segregated South and had been largely disenfranchised until the 1965 Voting Rights Act, vote not once but twice for a Black President, to the joy of the watching world.

And within living memory of the brutalities of the civil rights movement, I watched Americans elect as President of the United States of America a black man called Barack Hussein Obama, whose name recalled two of America’s greatest recent enemies, Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden, a name that should have been a non-starter in American-politics!

There were some white faces in the crowd who listened to Martin Luther King, perhaps 5%. And in the crowd who listened to Barack Obama’s re-election speech? Over 50%. You’ve come a long way, America!

As I realized last week  during my wonderful stay in a Christian community in Germany, nations can change. They can reinvent themselves, just as individuals can.

* * *

I watched my 18 year old daughter, Zoe, fill out her absentee ballot for Barack Hussein Obama,

And when the election results were analysed the next day, I was proud of the way our family voted.

I’m guessing most people vote for the candidate whose policies, in their estimation, most benefit themselves and their families.

These were the groups who predominantly voted for Obama. Blacks (94%), Asians (74%), Latinos (73%), and Jews (69%).  However, whites still make up 72% of the electorate, and without their support, Obama would not have won. 41% of whites voted for a black President. And this would have been beyond Martin Luther King’s wildest dreams. No wonder, as the results rolled in, so many were tearful.

Blacks, Latinos, Asians and Jews. Who else voted for Barack Hussein Obama? Women: 55%. Young people 18-29: 60%. Those in the lowest income bracket (below $50,000): 60%.

Romney did best among whites, especially men, especially those over 65, especially those earning more than $100,000, and with a college degree.

 * * *

Karl Barth famously said, “Take your Bible and take your newspapers, and read both.”   Rowan Williams repeated Barth’s advice for his successor, “You have to be cross-referencing all the time”

And so when I read of the people who elected Barack Obama, I thought of the support base of David, the King of Israel who was most after God’s heart.  “All those who were in distress or in debt or discontented gathered around him, and he became their commander.” (1 Samuel 22:2)

I thought of the support base of Jesus, people who were “harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” “Have any of the rulers or of the Pharisees believed in him? No! But this mob that knows nothing of the law is accursed.” (John 7:48). “The large crowd listened to him with delight.” (Mark 12:37). “The people were delighted with all the wonderful things he was doing,” (Luke 13:17).

Yeah, I was kind of glad our family voted for the candidate supported by ethnic minorities, by women, and by groups with somewhat lower education and income, and whose policies are in their estimate, most likely to “make justice roll down like a river”.

I am glad Americans voted in someone perceived to be good news to the poor. And I believe he will be a great American president.

* * *

In fact, ironically, Martin Luther King’s big dream was not big enough. Having a black President in the White House would have seemed an impossible dream in 1963, in an era of legalized segregation and discrimination, when hundreds of thousands of African-American were denied the vote though literacy tests (administered by whites, which even the literate “failed,”) poll taxes or physical violence

But perhaps King foresaw more than he could have credibly shared. The last lines of his last speech on April 3rd, 1968 the night before he was assassinated are powerful and prophetic.

We’ve got some difficult days ahead. But it really doesn’t matter with me now, because I’ve been to the mountaintop.

And I don’t mind.

Like anybody, I would like to live a long life. Longevity has its place. But I’m not concerned about that now. I just want to do God’s will. And He’s allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I’ve looked over. And I’ve seen the Promised Land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people, will get to the promised land!

And so I’m happy, tonight.

I’m not worried about anything.

I’m not fearing any man!

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord!!

 * * *

All our eyes are seeing glory–the glory of nations, America, Germany, Britain, transcending their dark histories, forgetting the sin and shame of the past, moving forward to the day when in the words of the prophet Amos quoted in Martin Luther King’s great “I have a Dream” speech, “justice shall roll down like a river, and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

Filed Under: random Tagged With: Barack Obama, Civil Rights, Frederick Douglass, Martin Luther King

Letter to a Young Writer (My Essay from “Letters to Me,” Edited by Dan Schmidt)

By Anita Mathias

LTM cover pdf

Letters to Me

I have an essay in Letters to Me: Conversations with a Younger Self. The other contributors include Brian McLaren, Kristin Ritzau, Tamara Lunardo, Lore Ferguson, Shawn Smucker, and Penny Nash–a total of 20 writers.

Writers remember something that happened when they were between 18 and 30, and then send a letter to themselves about that event. With the benefit of hindsight and reflection, they warn, challenge, and encourage a younger self facing a problem at work, a budding relationship, an important decision, an unexpected development…

And here’s my essay

A Letter to a Young Writer

Hi Anita,

Late one evening when you were twenty-one, as you were praying about your future, you began writing poetry. Eight poems in an evening in an ecstatic rush. So you believed that writing was your calling, your vocation, and you were not wrong.

The next week, you entered a creative writing competition for students—and won.

And so you settled on that most romantic of dreams. You decided to become a writer.

* * *

And you will now look up publishers, daydream about your first published book. Ignoring the little fact that you don’t yet have a subject you are in love with. That you haven’t yet written the book!

The dream of early success comes true for some. Scott Fitzgerald published his best-selling book, This Side of Paradise, when he was twenty-four.

But for those with a human, rather than a genius-sized gift, it takes years to master an art. Ars Longa, Vita Brevis, Horace observed, which Chaucer plaintively rendered as “Life is so short, and the craft takes so long to learn”  In Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell estimates that it takes 10,000 hours of deliberate practice—ten years of twenty hour weeks—to master an art.

10,000 hours! And it takes that long in the school of living to learn the lyrics and melody of the unique song you have to sing to the world. So learn to love the act of writing as much as the pleasure of accomplishing your writing dreams.

* * *

There are ultimately just two ways to become a writer—saturation reading, and lots of writing.

Other things help—good teachers, constructive criticism, a literary community, connections, encouragement, leisure to write–but these are secondary.

So read, read, read.  Saturation reading is the swiftest way to improve as a writer, but follow your bliss, as well as reading “the best that has been thought and said.” The most tasty fish and fowl are free-range. It’s the same with writers. What we read shapes who we become. And what we write.

And if reading proves difficult in a world of too-much distraction, be a judoka. Use the strength of your opponent to achieve your own purposes. Listen to books on tape, and you’ll subliminally pick up rhythm, pacing, style, and you’ll find that your writing will flow more easily.

* * *

Keep writing, every day you can. A writer writes. Flaubert wisely says, “Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work.”

Develop a good schedule—prayer, scripture, exercise, reading, writing, gardening—instead of a long chain of procrastination before you begin writing. Wake earlier to increase your chance of getting work done.

* * *

Teachers are a  great shortcut, so that each writer need not re-invent the wheel. They point out ugliness, absurdity, sentimentality, and awkwardness before your ear has evolved enough to spot them yourself. They might show you your blind spots. They teach clever rhetorical tricks, and suggest writers to read who are like beacons further along the winding way, whose words take an axe to the frozen spring within you.

If you have an unkind teacher, however, they waste time by destroying your self-confidence, and making you self-conscious, so that you look at your fingers rather than listen to the music, and half-believe you know nothing at all.

Not everyone who has failed wishes you to succeed. The successful are not necessarily cheerleaders. There is a fine line between a mentor and a tormentor.

So take the criticism of teachers with a grain of salt, always listening to your inner voice, your inner wisdom, which intuitively knows the book you both want to write and can write.

Advice is a double-edged sword. Accept no advice without praying through it. For the most important, the vital voice you need to learn to hear is your heavenly Father’s.

* * *

Keep experimenting to find your unique voice, subject matter and form, something which you absolutely love. Finding this will slow down publication and success, but it will be deeper, last longer, and be more satisfying because of that.

Listen to your intuition, and write the book you want to write, even if it means self-publishing when your vision diverges from an editor’s.

* * *

Naturally, like all young writers, you will long for validation. Orwell rightly observes, This is one of the reasons writers write—Sheer egoism. Desire to seem clever, to be talked about, to be remembered after death, to get your own back on the grown-ups who snubbed you in childhood, etc.

And the world will be full of the tempting Turkish Delight of distractions. Magazines will have essay prizes; state and national arts boards will have fellowships; writers’ conferences will have scholarships for promising young writers; writers’ colonies will offer you an Arcadian idyll with lunch brought to your door, and organic suppers eaten with other artists and writers. Writing is a pyramid scheme, and so those further along the way will host classes and workshops and seminars, which will lure you with helpful criticism and praise so sweet that you will forget your tuition has partly bought it.

Time spent achieving this external validation, “playing writer,” is not entirely wasted. Your writing will sharpen; you’ll meet other writers and learn from them; you’ll be offered some useful (and some useless) criticism; and your self-confidence, that invaluable tool for a writer, will grow.

But amid this Vanity Fair of Distractions,  remember the 10,000 hour rule. Keep reading. Keep writing.  Don’t let the quest for validation distract you from the quest for mastery. For as you apply for fellowships, prizes, and grants, a few showcase chapters can get perfected, while the rest of the manuscript languishes.  Oh, privilege the first draft. Keep it moving.

* * *

As a young person seeking an unusual path, you will be tempted to seek “justification by writing”—glory and impressive achievement to slip into conversation to explain what you spend your time doing.  But remember that if you seek validation through the addictive drug of success, you will need more and more of it, for yesterday’s glories soon become yesterday’s news.

How much better to just relax and be yourself, and be liked and accepted for who you are, not what you do. To enjoy people without needing to impress them.

Remember that success will not have the haemoglobin or oxygen your heart needs. For that, you will need to soak in the love of the Father, and have his love strengthen and heal you. And validate you.

* * *

While you log your 10,000 hours towards mastery, share your ideas and experiences.  And the evolving world might offer a venue to do this which will be known by a strange word: Blogging. Blogging, writing to be read quickly and easily will teach you things that writing in hermetical isolation will not. You’ll develop a writing style which is easy to read. You’ll learn what speaks to people. You’ll be challenged and rebutted and so grow as a thinker, Christian, and writer.

The discipline of daily blogging will teach you to write swiftly and to slay the dragon of perfectionism. And blogging will bring the affirmation which counts–people who actually read your work, and return to read it, again and again. And other precious jewels—daily practice in putting your thoughts into words, stimulation, creative breakthrough, increasing confidence, connections and friendships.

* * *

Henry James famously said, “If one desires to do the best one can with one’s pen, there is one word you must inscribe upon your banner, and that word is Loneliness.”‘

You need solitude, quietness and focus to think and write. But excessive work can lead to burn-out, staleness, loneliness and lowered motivation.  As an extrovert, and human being, you also need friendship and  social support. Besides, friendship introduces you to the real stories being written in people’s lives, and informs and inspires your writing.

Keep a balance between times spent in solitude and time with friends.

* * *

You will hear that connections are the third wing of the writer’s life: reading, writing and connections. And yes, writing friends can suggest books to read, give you honest feedback, provide inspiration and open doors.

But never cultivate connections for selfish advantage. Seek friendship instead. Seek out those you find interesting, who you like and enjoy.  Then the good things friendship brings will be accidental and incidental to the goodness of friendship itself, which as the magisterial C.S. Lewis writes in “The Inner Ring,” “causes perhaps half of all the happiness in the world.”

* * *

Sometimes, connections lead to the fairy tale of the literary life–discovery by fairy godmothers: an editor and an agent. The fairy-tale wedding of publication. Happily ever after.

Don’t count on it.

Instead, write the book you really want to write, which is called forth by all the circumstances of your life and experience. Do not waste time hustling. Trust God to find a way for your words to reach the world.

For good writing is magnetic. It leaps off the page, makes its own connections, its own magic. First, write the rabbit for the magicians to flourish.

Christianity, your faith, is a fairy tale filled with reversals, redemption, and happiness ever after. And you will see a fairy tale unfold in your writing life, because a good God who loves you and called you to write is drafting the script, not you. And that fairy tale will include the archetypal element of surprise.

* * *

God made you a writer, and when you write you feel his pleasure. So don’t surrender your writing, should the time of babies and domesticity come.  Put first things first, but don’t altogether sacrifice second things, your writing.  Keep it as a little private secret Kingdom you can retreat to.

Which means you will live with tension. You will not mother perfectly; the house will not be perfectly organised; the writing not perfect, either. You will make peace with good-enough.

And the tensions of these years will drive you to your Saviour.

 

But eventually, children grow up. Domestic discipline is learned. And once you are at peace with God and man, words will flow easily, like honey. And tidiness and domestic order will subliminally help your creativity.

* * *

Do not feel guilty about writing when the church wants you to take meals to the sick members, pour coffee at women’s breakfasts, or work in the crèche.

Writing is a calling no less valid.  Learn to lean on your heavenly Father, and let His creative power flow through you. Entrust your writing to God. The great laws of the spiritual life operate in writing too: Do not be afraid. Trust in the Father. Hang in there as a branch in the vine.

Creativity is a gift from God which he willingly pours on all who ask for it. Keep asking for more and more of it.

* * *

Your life is a story being written by God.

He intended you to write long before you even thought of it, and wants you to write as much as you want to.

He has lovely things in mind for you to write, which you have not yet dreamed of.

He knows the lives you will touch through your writing, people you do not yet know.

He has the perfect blueprint for the writing life you so desperately longed for.

And He says, “Come, my writer. Sharpen your senses to discern my plot.

Think not of former things. See, I am doing a new thing; do you not perceive it?

Come, dance with Me in fresh woods and pastures new.”

 

Warmly,

Your doppelganger,

Anita

 

Anita Mathias has written Wandering Between Two Worlds (Benediction Classics, 2007), and blogs at Dreaming Beneath the Spires, http://dreamingbeneaththespires.blogspot.co.uk/.

Anita has a B.A. in English from Somerville College, Oxford University and an M.A. in Creative Writing from the Ohio State University. Her essays have appeared in The Washington Post, The London Magazine, Commonweal, America, The Christian Century, and The Best Spiritual Writing anthologies. She has won fellowships from The National Endowment for the Arts and The Minnesota State Arts Board

 

Anita lives in Oxford, England with her husband, Roy, and daughters, Zoe and Irene. Follow her on Twitter at AnitaMathias1.

Filed Under: Writing and Blogging Tagged With: writing

Anita’s Superlatives: I am Travelling, Museuming, Reading, Going Vegan

By Anita Mathias

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View from the Chemin de la Corniche (Luxembourg)

I’ve had an amazing week. And here are some superlatives.

Travel–Enjoyed a week at His Place, in Saarland, Germany run by the loving German Community Without Walls. A beautiful, restful and warm place with delicious healthy food. Loved it.

Luxembourg—Luxembourg City is gorgeous, and literally on a gorge. Enjoyed the staggering views, and the buildings built on a rock. I could have spent a couple more days there, just wandering around… Next time.

Wayne Negrini—Greatly enjoyed the hyper-energetic, larger-than-life, warm-hearted wise founder of the Community Without Walls, who spent several hours talking to us over a couple of evenings. He is as knowledgeable about natural health and healing as about the things of the Spirit.

And ladies and gentlemen, I intend to gradually educate myself about the former as much as the latter

The Eat to Live Programme—Part of my problem with weight loss is that I could never hear clearly from God as to what diet to follow. And I guess I needed to repent of and renounce seeking comfort or stress-relief or highs in food rather than God.

Well, I have done that, so was in a right place when Wayne suggested the Eat to Live programme by John Fuhrman M.D.  lending us some videos on it. It’s a low-carb vegan diet. I have been vegetarian before, for long periods of time, but never low-carb vegetarian, and never vegan.

But this diet (unlimited fruits, vegetables, beans, legumes, and limited nuts and seeds) is doing wonders for me so far. Some weight lost easily, and I find I need remarkably less sleep, my mind is clearer, and my ability to think and concentrate is vastly increased.

Zoe and Roy who both independently wanted to go vegetarian are on it too. Irene burst into tears at the thought of it, as she loves meat and dairy, but so far, she’s enjoying the creative vegetarian food, and  we’ve told her to eat up on meat and diary at her school lunches!

Pre-Raphaelites at the Tate—A glorious exhibition, including many paintings from private collections.

Best Blog Post I’ve Read This Week.

Loved this post by Glennon Melton in which her husband tells her The News, and she’s suddenly a single mom. My philosophy of blogging is a little like hers, but being American and Californian, she goes much further in openness, honesty and self-revelation.

Glennon says: A life well lived is one lived in the light.  I learned long ago that living a secret life doesn’t work for me. To be healthy and sane —to feel safe—I have to live out loud. There is a saying in recovery: we are sick as our secrets. I refuse to be sick again. So I have to share my truth with you. 

“I only know as much of myself as I have the courage to reveal to you,”  John Powell wrote. The best  blogs I think come out of a relentless pushing towards honesty and truthfulness.

Best passage from an audiobook

We listened to “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader” on our way back from Germany. Loved this description of how sanctification works.

The selfish Eustace is turned into a dragon, his animagus or daemon. Then Aslan, the Christ-Lion leads him to a well.

The water was as clear as anything and I thought if I could get in there and bathe it would ease the pain in my leg. But the lion told me I must undress first. Mind you, I don’t know if he said any words out loud or not.

“I was just going to say that I couldn’t undress because I hadn’t any clothes on when I suddenly thought that dragons are snaky sort of things and snakes can cast their skins. Oh, of course, thought I, that’s what the lion means. So I started scratching myself and my scales began coming off all over the place. And then I scratched a little deeper and, instead of just scales coming off here and there, my whole skin started peeling off beautifully, like it does after an illness, or as if I was a banana. In a minute or two I just stepped out of it. I could see it lying there beside me, looking rather nasty. It was a most lovely feeling. So I started to go down into the well for my bathe.

“But just as I was going to put my feet into the water I looked down and saw that they were all hard and rough and wrinkled and scaly just as they had been before. Oh, that’s all right, said I, it only means I had another smaller suit on underneath the first one, and I’ll have to get out of it too. So 1 scratched and tore again and this underskin peeled off beautifully and out I stepped and left it lying beside the other one and went down to the well for my bathe.

“Well, exactly the same thing happened again. And I thought to myself, oh dear, how ever many skins have I got to take off? For I was longing to bathe my leg. So I scratched away for the third time and got off a third skin, just like the two others, and stepped out of it. But as soon as I looked at myself in the water I knew it had been no good.

“Then the lion said” – but I don’t know if it spoke – “You will have to let me undress you.” I was afraid of his claws, I can tell you, but I was pretty nearly desperate now. So I just lay flat down on my back to let him do it.

“The very first tear he made was so deep that I thought it had gone right into my heart. And when he began pulling the skin off, it hurt worse than anything I’ve ever felt. The only thing that made me able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off.


“Well, he peeled the beastly stuff right off – just as I thought I’d done it myself the other three times, only they hadn’t hurt – and there it was lying on the grass: only ever so much thicker, and darker, and more knobbly-looking than the others had been. And there was I as smooth and soft as a peeled switch and smaller than I had been. Then he caught hold of me – I didn’t like that much for I was very tender underneath now that I’d no skin on – and threw me into the water. It smarted like anything but only for a moment. After that it became perfectly delicious and as soon as I started swimming and splashing I found that all the pain had gone from my arm. And then I saw why. I’d turned into a boy again.’

I am in a mid-life process of revising my daily life, schedule, work habits and rhythms, and making them more beautiful, more godly, more monastic if you like.

Some things I can sort of do on my own—put on Rescue Time or Antisocial to avoid internet distraction when I write; wake earlier; exercise; tidy up.

For some things, like eating when stressed or sad or bored or frustrated, a habit I formed decades ago, I need help.

And sometimes, the help Aslan/Jesus gives can hurt at first, but then, it feels so good.

Filed Under: In which I chase the wild goose of the Holy Spirit, In which I get serious about health and diet and fitness and exercise (really) Tagged With: Eat to Live, Germany, Luxembourg, PreRaphaelites, Veganism

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  • Christ’s Great Golden Triad to Guide Our Actions and Decisions
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Oxford, England. Writer, memoirist, podcaster, blogger, Biblical meditation teacher, mum

Looking at photos from our week in beautiful Sevil Looking at photos from our week in beautiful Seville and Cordoba over New Year with Irene, who had a week off.
And, ICYMI, here’s my latest meditation on the Gospel of Matthew… I’ve recorded it, should you want a few minutes of peace.
https://anitamathias.com/2026/04/29/gods-complete-forgiveness/
Hello Friends, I'm resumed recording my meditation Hello Friends, I'm resumed recording my meditations on the Gospel of Matthew. Do click on this link to listen. 
https://anitamathias.com/.../29/gods-complete-forgiveness/
Christ is the most influential figure in the history of the world, though his life ended in shame, humiliation and failure. But he so completely turned things round in his great reversal that the cross on which he died when all seemed hopeless is now the most common, and revered, symbol in history.
He emerged from and was anchored in Judaism. And as the sins of the people were laid on the scapegoat who was sent into the wilderness to perish, Christ died as the lamb of God voluntarily bearing the guilt of the wrongdoing of the whole world. He paid the price for our forgiveness with his life-blood--in accordance with the iron law of the physical and moral universe, of sowing and reaping, cause and effect. 
And so, God, who appeared as flames of fire to Moses, can now dwell within us, purifying us, whose hearts have darkness and shards of ice. 
And now that Christ was crucified, died, but rose again, His Spirit, no longer contained within his earthly body, is poured out like living water onto all humans, at our humble request. The Spirit pours the love of God into us; he reminds us of the words of Jesus and slowly writes Christ’s sweet law on our hearts. This transfusion of grace helps us do hard things we previously couldn’t do. Our dance with the Spirit gradually breaks the power of sin over us. It transforms us.
Now we, the forgiven, protected by the blood of Jesus poured out over us, and filled with His Spirit, who sings within us, Abba, Father, are adopted by God as his children in his joyful new covenant. We are cells grafted into the vine of our new family--Father, Son, Spirit—who now live in us as we live in them. As we choose by our thoughts and actions to continue living in the vine of Jesus, their energy pulsing through us makes us fruitful. And now, all our prayers which flow in the river of God’s good purposes are kindly heard. Waves of love and power flood from the cross! 
Thank you!
Well, hello friends! Breaking radio silence to let Well, hello friends! Breaking radio silence to let you know that I have taped a meditation for you on Christ’s famous Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25. https://anitamathias.com/2025/11/05/using-gods-gift-of-our-talents-a-path-to-joy-and-abundance/
Here you are, click the play button in the blog post for a brief meditation, and some moments of peace, and, perhaps, inspiration in your day 🙂
Hi Friends, I have taped a meditation; do listen a Hi Friends, I have taped a meditation; do listen at this link: https://anitamathias.com/2025/04/08/the-kingdom-of-god-is-here-already-yet-not-yet-here-2/
It’s on the Kingdom of God, of which Christ so often spoke, which is here already—a mysterious, shimmering internal palace in which, in lightning flashes, we experience peace and joy, and yet, of course, not yet fully here. We sense the rainbowed presence of Christ in the song which pulses through creation. Christ strolls into our rooms with his wisdom and guidance, and things change. Our prayers are answered; we are healed; our hearts are strangely warmed. Sometimes.
And yet, we also experience evil within & all around us. Our own sin which can shatter our peace and the trajectory of our lives. And the sins of the world—its greed, dishonesty and environmental destruction.
But in this broken world, we still experience the glory of creation; “coincidences” which accelerate once we start praying, and shalom which envelops us like sudden sunshine. The portals into this Kingdom include repentance, gratitude, meditative breathing, and absolute surrender.
The Kingdom of God is here already. We can experience its beauty, peace and joy today through the presence of the Holy Spirit. But yet, since, in the Apostle Paul’s words, we do not struggle only “against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the unseen powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil,” its fullness still lingers…
Our daughter Zoe was ordained into the Church of E Our daughter Zoe was ordained into the Church of England in June. I have been on a social media break… but … better late than never. Enjoy!
First picture has my sister, Shalini, who kindly flew in from the US. Our lovely cousins Anthony and Sarah flank Zoe in the next picture.
The Bishop of London, Sarah Mullaly, ordained Zoe. You can see her praying that Zoe will be filled with the Holy Spirit!!
And here’s a meditation I’ve recorded, which you might enjoy. The link is also in my profile
https://anitamathias.com/2024/11/07/all-those-who-exalt-themselves-will-be-humbled-the-humble-will-be-exalted/
I have taped a meditation on Jesus statement in Ma I have taped a meditation on Jesus statement in Matthew 23, “For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
Do listen here. https://anitamathias.com/2024/11/07/all-those-who-exalt-themselves-will-be-humbled-the-humble-will-be-exalted/
Link also in bio.
And so, Jesus states a law of life. Those who broadcast their amazingness will be humbled, since God dislikes—scorns that, as much as people do.  For to trumpet our success, wealth, brilliance, giftedness or popularity is to get distracted from our life’s purpose into worthless activity. Those who love power, who are sure they know best, and who must be the best, will eventually be humbled by God and life. For their focus has shifted from loving God, doing good work, and being a blessing to their family, friends, and the world towards impressing others, being enviable, perhaps famous. These things are houses built on sand, which will crumble when hammered by the waves of old age, infirmity or adversity. 
God resists the proud, Scripture tells us—those who crave the admiration and power which is His alone. So how do we resist pride? We slow down, so that we realise (and repent) when sheer pride sparks our allergies to people, our enmities, our determination to have our own way, or our grandiose ego-driven goals, and ambitions. Once we stop chasing limelight, a great quietness steals over our lives. We no longer need the drug of continual achievement, or to share images of glittering travel, parties, prizes or friends. We just enjoy them quietly. My life is for itself & not for a spectacle, Emerson wrote. And, as Jesus advises, we quit sharp-elbowing ourselves to sit with the shiniest people, but are content to hang out with ordinary people; and then, as Jesus said, we will inevitably, eventually, be summoned higher to the sparkling conversation we craved. 
One day, every knee will bow before the gentle lamb who was slain, now seated on the throne. We will all be silent before him. Let us live gently then, our eyes on Christ, continually asking for his power, his Spirit, and his direction, moving, dancing, in the direction that we sense him move.
Link to new podcast in Bio https://anitamathias.co Link to new podcast in Bio https://anitamathias.com/2024/02/20/how-jesus-dealt-with-hostility-and-enemies/
3 days before his death, Jesus rampages through the commercialised temple, overturning the tables of moneychangers. Who gave you the authority to do these things? his outraged adversaries ask. And Jesus shows us how to answer hostile questions. Slow down. Breathe. Quick arrow prayers!
Your enemies have no power over your life that your Father has not permitted them. Ask your Father for wisdom, remembering: Questions do not need to be answered. Are these questioners worthy of the treasures of your heart? Or would that be feeding pearls to hungry pigs, who might instead devour you?
Questions can contain pitfalls, traps, nooses. Jesus directly answered just three of the 183 questions he was asked, refusing to answer some; answering others with a good question.
But how do we get the inner calm and wisdom to recognise
and sidestep entrapping questions? Long before the day of
testing, practice slow, easy breathing, and tune in to the frequency of the Father. There’s no record of Jesus running, rushing, getting stressed, or lacking peace. He never spoke on his own, he told us, without checking in with the Father. So, no foolish, ill-judged statements. Breathing in the wisdom of the Father beside and within him, he, unintimidated, traps the trappers.
Wisdom begins with training ourselves to slow down and ask
the Father for guidance. Then our calm minds, made perceptive, will help us recognise danger and trick questions, even those coated in flattery, and sidestep them or refuse to answer.
We practice tuning in to heavenly wisdom by practising–asking God questions, and then listening for his answers about the best way to do simple things…organise a home or write. Then, we build upwards, asking for wisdom in more complex things.
Listening for the voice of God before we speak, and asking for a filling of the Spirit, which Jesus calls streams of living water within us, will give us wisdom to know what to say, which, frequently, is nothing at all. It will quieten us with the silence of God, which sings through the world, through sun and stars, sky and flowers.
Especially for @ samheckt Some very imperfect pi Especially for @ samheckt 
Some very imperfect pictures of my labradoodle Merry, and golden retriever Pippi.
And since, I’m on social media, if you are the meditating type, here’s a scriptural meditation on not being afraid, while being prudent. https://anitamathias.com/2024/01/03/do-not-be-afraid-but-do-be-prudent/
A new podcast. Link in bio https://anitamathias.c A new podcast. Link in bio
https://anitamathias.com/2024/01/03/do-not-be-afraid-but-do-be-prudent/
Do Not Be Afraid, but Do Be Prudent
“Do not be afraid,” a dream-angel tells Joseph, to marry Mary, who’s pregnant, though a virgin, for in our magical, God-invaded world, the Spirit has placed God in her. Call the baby Jesus, or The Lord saves, for he will drag people free from the chokehold of their sins.
And Joseph is not afraid. And the angel was right, for a star rose, signalling a new King of the Jews. Astrologers followed it, threatening King Herod, whose chief priests recounted Micah’s 600-year-old prophecy: the Messiah would be born in Bethlehem, as Jesus had just been, while his parents from Nazareth registered for Augustus Caesar’s census of the entire Roman world. 
The Magi worshipped the baby, offering gold. And shepherds came, told by an angel of joy: that the Messiah, a saviour from all that oppresses, had just been born.
Then, suddenly, the dream-angel warned: Flee with the child to Egypt. For Herod plans to kill this baby, forever-King.
Do not be afraid, but still flee? Become a refugee? But lightning-bolt coincidences verified the angel’s first words: The magi with gold for the flight. Shepherds
telling of angels singing of coming inner peace. Joseph flees.
What’s the difference between fear and prudence? Fear is being frozen or panicked by imaginary what-ifs. It tenses our bodies; strains health, sleep and relationships; makes us stingy with ourselves & others; leads to overwork, & time wasted doing pointless things for fear of people’s opinions.
Prudence is wisdom-using our experience & spiritual discernment as we battle the demonic forces of this dark world, in Paul’s phrase.It’s fighting with divinely powerful weapons: truth, righteousness, faith, Scripture & prayer, while surrendering our thoughts to Christ. 
So let’s act prudently, wisely & bravely, silencing fear, while remaining alert to God’s guidance, delivered through inner peace or intuitions of danger and wrongness, our spiritual senses tuned to the Spirit’s “No,” his “Slow,” his “Go,” as cautious as a serpent, protected, while being as gentle as a lamb among wolves.
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