Anita Mathias: Dreaming Beneath the Spires

Anita Mathias's Blog on Faith and Art

Let me be singing when the evening comes

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happy

My daughters, Zoe and Irene, returned from a visit to my mother in India moved and struck by a 91 year old childless widow called Jenny.

Jenny lived alone, in a tiny house that a landlord had carved off from his own house. One “room” was a corridor. Her tiny bedroom leaked and the landlord would not fix the roof, so she slept in the minuscule living room.

She owned little, had no income, and meagre savings, but was cheerful and happy. “When I wake up in the morning, I thank Jesus for everything.” “I read my Bible all the time.” She was upbeat and positive, singing them a cheerful song about counting blessings in her quavery old voice. With very little money, a tiny leaky house, and no family. My goodness!

They took her a little box with five Thornton’s chocolates. In return, she gave them five bars of chocolate, and a tiffin of chicken curry she had prepared, keeping only a wing for herself. The next day, out of her generosity, she sent pork curry. Overflowing generosity; overflowing joy. There is a link.

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One of my life’s epiphanic experiences was visiting the Bible teacher Dick Woodward who was paralysed from the neck down and in pain, but ebullient, wise and cheerful. What is inside is everything, I realized. Our attitude is everything. The spiritual life is everything. All the wealth and success in the world cannot give us happiness. The spiritual life, on the other hand, is like magic eyes which bathe everything in rainbows and gold dust.

I have a slight advantage when it comes to happiness stakes, because I am naturally cheerful and high-spirited. “Happy” if you like. Current psychological research suggests a “set-point” for happiness–life events move us a few points up or down, but it’s basically set by our inherited biology.

However, being cheerful and positive is also learned behaviour, a facet of character, and of paramount importance to develop as one ages.

Andrew Solomon in his writing on depression (Noonday Demon) suggests that, as we age, the sheath of myelin around our nerves wears away. Anyone who lives long enough will eventually become clinically depressed (he speculates).

What’s our best defence against becoming a crabby, ungrateful, tiresome, negative old person?

Practising. Practising cheerfulness. Practising gratitude.

Positive psychologist Martin Seligman posits that whose who record the “three blessings” of their day find themselves 25% percent happier in 1-3 months.

Wow!

Thou that has given so much to me,

Give one thing more a grateful heart 

 Not thankful, when it pleaseth me;   

 As if thy blessings had spare days:   

But such a heart,    

Whose pulse may be Thy praise.       (George Herbert, “The Temple”).

That is one of my frequent prayers: Give me a grateful heart. For all the blessings, all the wealth, all the success in the world is of no benefit to us if we do not have a singing heart, thankful for the goodness of the world pouring itself into our very small hands.

Oh, let me be singing when the evening comes!

 

 

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  1. Good post today. Appreciate your blog. The reference to Mr. Woodward was touched my heart. I, too, would want to know where he received his countenance of peace despite pain. It must be joy since happiness can be so fleeting. Happiness can depend on events where joy is reflective response despite circumstances. Perhaps that’s why Jesus referred to joy as a fruit of the spirit. Those who are connected to Christ — bear the good fruit. And a consistent attitude displays great faith. Something I continually ask God for.

  2. Anita – Papa’s pain was a 24/7 reality, yet he CHOSE an attitude of gratitude. When pain woke him up in the night or morning, he’d begin ‘weighing’ his blessings. He always said, ‘my blessings outweigh my challenges,’ – but he started on the blessings side of the scales. Thank you for remembering him! You’ll be happy to hear the MBC is still going very strong in numerous languages all over India. grace, peace & grateful hearts – Virginia

    • Virginia, he was an inspiration–as you, Dwight and Ginny are in your selfless love and service to him, and each other. I was privileged to have met him!

    • Oh John, I so want it to become habitual. When my mind seems to be on a rabbit trail of negativity, I try to stop and a) think of something good about whoever is annoying me, b) repent of my own, often similar, sin.
      Having done that, so that I don’t suppress the negative, I think I would like to move to thankfulness, to be singing when the evening comes!

  4. I often find that it is the person who has the least who gives the most. It is real fun and a source of joy whenever I give something. Jesus experienced the joy of giving in His suffering on the cross. “But for the joy set before Him, he endured the cross, despising its shame…” Hebrews 12:2 And His joy was in knowing He was giving all for us, taking the punishment for our sin so that we could have a love relationship with Him that is real and personal.

    • Yes, people who have the least often give the most. It’s makes me annoyed, both because they have given so much, and because those who have so much more give so little.
      But I have also noticed that those who have much but are not generous also lack joy and happiness, and the generosity of the poor is accompanied by joy.
      So who am I to wish the poor were less generous, when they have the pure joy of exercising a divine trait and gift!

    • Thanks, Bev. I like how Swindoll says our attitude is the only thing we can control–the single string we can keep playing on!

  6. Thank you for this uplifting post. It was just what I was needing to read this morning. The Lord continue to bless you in your writing. (I’ve followed you off and on, but have only just realised how to comment.)

      • I just joined you today Anitha pls bring my faith up to speed because I have long be searching for God and I need His refreshment. Do it for me if you can

        • Thanks Chimezie for following.
          Spend time with God, and meditate on Scripture, starting with 5 minutes and increasing it until you feel your soul to be full of faith and joy and trust.
          No substitute for that.
          Blogs can remind you of the treasures in God and Scripture, but, of course, you have to dig deep into these yourself.
          Blessings, Anita

  7. An attitude of gratitude is the essence of a life filled with love and joy each day. God is pleased when we accept our circumstances and hardships in an attitude of finding God’s best in where we are placed. You gave such wonderful examples of those who have a joyful and even happy life despite the odds stacked against them. It is truly when we are seeking Jesus and turning to our spirit that God’s resurrection life thrives. Thank you for these words today.