We are listening to A Praying Life by Paul Miller, a wonderful book on prayer in the car. (I was, incidentally disciplined by the author for almost five years, as he mentions in the book).
Anyway, Miller tells us that he often prays aloud. Jesus did so in his High Priestly Prayer in John 17, and his anguished prayers at Gethsemane. (However, Jesus also encourages us to pray in the privacy of our rooms so that our prayers don’t impress people (rather than God)…and thereby lose us the secret reward God gives those who pray.)
“Praying out loud can be helpful because it keeps you from getting lost in your head. It makes your thoughts concrete,” Miller writes. “When I confess a sin aloud, it feels more real. I’m surprised by how concrete the sin feels. I’ve even thought, ‘Oh I guess that was really wrong.’ On the way to a social event, I will pray aloud in the car that I won’t fall into lust or people pleasing. My prayers become more serious.”
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However, when I find it hard to focus on prayer, what helps me is not praying out loud (I live with two daughters, one husband, one Golden Retriever, and one Labradoodle, and don’t want to startle any of them) but writing out my prayers.
When I pray my thoughts meander in the natural way of thoughts. Writing out my prayers helps me redirect my thoughts to the subject I was praying about so that I can saturate that worry in prayer, make sure I have heard God on it, and am acting in accordance with his directives. (This is particularly important for unanswered prayers so one senses the story God is writing in our lives).
I like to put my worries into the petri dish of prayer, so to say, bathing them in prayer, and continuing to “pray until something happens.” Written prayers help me “worry the bone of a prayer,” until light and clarity emerges as to what God might be doing in the things I am praying about, and what he wants me to do.
(Interestingly, though, Miller says prayer should be like human conversation between friends, meandering, free-flowing, playful. So if, in the middle of praying-worrying about how I am writing less than I want to, I start praying-worrying that I am exercising a bit less than I want to, and then that the room I am praying in is a tad messier than I want it to be…Miller would suggest praying about the latest worries that have popped up their groundhog heads instead of dragging prayer back to the first worry. Confess. Ask for help. Ask for strategy. And who knows? Perhaps the solution to the first worry—disappointing productivity–lies in the next two: not enough exercise, not enough tidying up!! Yes, indeed!)
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The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson is another prayer-changing, hope-refilling book on prayer. Just as Jesus does, Batterson encourages us to pray about anything. Wild dreams, wild-goose dreams, dreams we are afraid to vocalize, dreams we can only keep alive because the Creator of the Universe can do and create anything… The dreams that we are embarrassed to say aloud, we can write down. And in the process of writing them down, they feel a little bit more real. “Dreaming is a form of prayer and prayer is a form of dreaming,” as Batterson says.
I have often found that wild-goose dreams I have prayed for have uncannily come to pass. In that way, our prayers can be prophetic, and, in the areas we have saturated in prayer, the transcript of our lives resembles the transcript of our prayers, to quote Batterson again.
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We often don’t know our own hearts and minds and spirits. That is why people go to therapy!! Expressive writing is a form of therapy. So too is prayer journaling.
In the process of putting it down, in stark black and white, clarity comes about what I really want—which women socialized to be nice and obliging often don’t know!!
The actions and emotions of my own heart that I am less than proud about get unveiled and gradually repented of. The hurts and slights, the slings and arrows of interpersonal relationships which could metastasize into a cancer of unforgiveness if brooded over are released and forgiven…
Write out your confusion and lack of clarity. The areas of your life where you are not sure what God is doing, or the direction in which your life is veering. I often feel I know very little about my own life, the plot God is writing in and through it, the direction in which he is bending it, and what he wants me to do… Prayer helps me to understand the story that God is writing in my life a little better, and written prayer clarifies and focuses my heart-prayer.
I’m Recommending:
The Circle Maker: Praying Circles Around Your Biggest Dreams and Greatest Fears on Amazon.co.uk and on Amazon.com.
A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul Miller on Amazon.co.uk and on Amazon.com.
Read my new memoir: Rosaries, Reading, Secrets: A Catholic Childhood in India (US) or UK.
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There is a lot of teaching in the prayers recorded in the Scriptures; the Lord’s prayer in John 17 and Paul’s in Ephesians 1 and 3 being examples. My attempts at verse often have an element of prayer and praise in them.
Yes, indeed! Thanks, David!
I have written out my favourite Bible verses and reflected on them for a few years now. But I never thought of writing out my prayers until now. There is definitely something about writing out prayers that make them seem more real than if you don’t write them out or say them out loud. It’s your personal time with God. I also think that it’s a good way of seeing when you first prayed about something and seeing the progress of your prayer being answered.
“There is definitely something about writing out prayers that make them seem more real than if you don’t write them out or say them out loud. I also think that it’s a good way of seeing when you first prayed about something and seeing the progress of your prayer being answered.”
Exactly! Thanks, Natalie. And welcome to my blog!
Yes! I often start writing out a scripture, then intercede paranthetically as my heart and the Spirit lead …I also have gotten into the habit of circling words, phrases, themes that repeat themselves in a given time period (banner, Be still, Gid is faithful, etc..), so they “jump” off the page. Then I can look back and see how God is moving in my life, what is on His big, beautiful heart…
That’s lovely. What you have describes sounds like a lovely, luxurious, pleasure-giving practice, one that I would enjoy! I must make more time for it. I used to pray using scripture as a diving board for years, and am slowly returning to it again. It’s such a rich practice. Also, it sort of purifies the heart, ensuring that what we are praying for is in line with God’s heart, and thinking.
Prayer Journalling is something I have done for many years. It is interesting to find others do the same. And of course you can look back and see what has been learned over the years. Blessed and peaceful journalling.
It is indeed fascinating to see how much we have learned and changed over the years! I like to compare myself with who I was 5 years ago when I feel discouraged about my slow spiritual progress!
I often write my prayers but struggle with the idea that it is a “legitimate” form of prayer. But following King David’s lead, I continue to write them down.
How interesting! If prayer is talking to God then any form is legitimate as long as it’s honest, surely?
Ah, David! What a good example of helpful written prayer!
“” often feel I know so little about my own life.” What a deep, resonant chord was struck when I read that. Especially when the future stretches rather hesitantly out into a wide horizon. And holding fast is not as easy as it looks. Thanks for helping me to focus.
“when the future stretches rather hesitantly out into a wide horizon.” I wish this were true for me. I feel stressed about the shortness of time, and that I haven’t done the main things I set out to do and hoped to do as a young woman. Perhaps I will still do them, or perhaps God had/has an entirely different story in mind for me!