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When People Mess up the Story of your Life, but God Edits it Beautifully

By Anita Mathias

The Flight into Egypt and the Triumph of the Innocents (William Holman Hunt)

I read Matthew 2 as I blog through the Bible, and realize how much sheer misery and hassle and stress Joseph and Mary and Jesus had to endure for no sin or mistake of their own—but purely because of their destiny, purely because of other people’s jealousy.

Herod was “disturbed” when the Magi said “Where is the one who has been born King of the Jews? We have seen his star in the east.”

No excitement about the one chosen to be King by a higher power, the one whose birth had such cosmic significance that a new star appeared in the heavens.

Instead, he views Jesus as a threat to be eliminated. All he cared about was the security of his own position. He did not hesitate to murder to safeguard it (as people may not hesitate to “backstab” anyone they perceive as a threat).

* * *

And so Joseph, Mary and Jesus go to Egypt, though they have done nothing wrong, leaving behind their familiar language, religion, friends, family, food, customers–purely to escape Herod’s murderous, neurotic wrath.

Have you ever had a major change forced on you because someone was jealous of your gifts? Threatened by you? I have!

* * *

And the death of Herod does not mean instant safety either. They return to Israel when they hear the blessed words, “Those who were trying to take the child’s life are dead.”

But Judea is still not safe. Herod’s son was in charge.

And so, with absolute certainty of the destiny of their toddler, they relocate to an obscure town in Galilee, Nazareth and bring him up there.

Exactly as foretold by the Prophet Isaiah.

All these tangential detours, this apparent wasted effort, this obscurity, this ruination of a nice career arc for Joseph, the upheaval for Mary and the toddler Jesus, all this was exactly in God’s plan.

Why?

We do not know.

We many never know.

* * *

 Once we have reached a certain age, we can look back at our lives, and say, “Oh okay, this worked out okay, because it led to this.” “Thank goodness that happened, it closed that door, and opened this.” “That worked out for good, because…”

And other things… Why did Milton– who was desperate to do just one thing: read and write–go blind? Why did my friend Chrissie’s husband wake up one morning and decide “he didn’t want to be a Christian, and didn’t want to be married?” Why did my mother lose her first-born son?

Why does God permit us to be blocked and thwarted through other people’s envy, fears and insecurities? Perhaps an answer is that these blocks channel the force of the stream of our energy and talent into productive directions. Perhaps the stream goes underground and comes out stronger.

Or perhaps, and this is the truest answer, we just don’t know.

* * *

Heck, we are just characters in the story of our lives. We don’t get to control where we were born, or our parents, or their wealth, or social class, or our early education. We don’t get to control our IQ, our looks, our strength, our talents, or our disabilities.

We are but characters in a play someone one is writing and directing, and it is our job to play our part as beautifully as possible, and when it is left to us, to improvise. And since much of the story of our lives, many chapters, are left blank for us to fill in as we please–to improvise as beautifully as possible.

But someone else has written the play, someone else is directing it, and when the plot seems utterly senseless—we relax in the fact that we have had a sneak peek at the last chapter. It will all end in celebration, in exultation, in a feast and endless rejoicing.

And so, when we do not understand the plot twists, we rest content in the brilliance of the author, the auteur, directing the story of our lives.

(And despite all Herod’s machination, he just gets a chapter or so in Jesus’s story. Jesus: He dominates history!)

Blog Through the Bible Project. Matthew 2.

 


Read my new memoir: Rosaries, Reading, Secrets: A Catholic Childhood in India (US) or UK.
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Comments

  1. Mandy says

    January 18, 2013 at 10:18 pm

    This post resonates with me too, as i’m going through a period of healing from scars that i’ve chosen to carry for far to long instead of leaving them at the foot of the cross. Too often I asked why, but finally realised God is so much bigger than my understanding.My story hasn’t always made sense to me, but it makes perfect sense to the Creator.

    • Anita Mathias says

      January 21, 2013 at 9:50 am

      Just prayed that Christ would continue to heal you (and me!)

  2. Joy Lenton says

    January 18, 2013 at 9:08 pm

    A great post, Anita. We all need reminding that our lives are part of a Greater Narrative than the one writ for us. As a character I sure wish I’d had some say in how mine turned out! I wouldn’t have chosen childhood abuse, a broken, dysfunctional family or chronic sickness over many years. But In surrendering to the Author I yield to God’s story, the warp add weft of which is still being wrought in my life and will be revealed as a beautiful tapestry of His grace…one day. The last chapter gives us hope because what we see is but a speck in the eternal purposes and  it all ends well – praise God!

    • Anita Mathias says

      January 21, 2013 at 9:50 am

      How well you’ve written this, Joy. Maybe develop it into a blog post, huh?

      • Joyphil75 says

        January 21, 2013 at 10:03 am

        Now there’s food for thought! Thanks very much for the idea, support and encouragement that was triggered by your own beautiful prose. Bless you, Anita. 🙂

  3. Debdobalina says

    January 18, 2013 at 8:49 pm

    Anita,

    This post resonates with me.

    The first 7years of my life were pretty idyllic; I thrived as my dad’s only daughter, and the apple of his eye. I gave my heart to Christ before I was 6, and reveled in His love. Within 2 years my family disintegrated, I didn’t see my dad or brothers again for another 7 years, and I gained a stepfather who was a pedophile.

    Often I’ve wondered why in the world God allowed my life to take such a detour. It feels like I’ve been dealing with the aftermath of my childhood abuse for decades. But…I know the plans He has for me. I know that He would not allow this sorrow in my life if it didn’t serve some purpose.

    We aren’t promised smooth sailing–quite the opposite! Thank you for writing this. Even the Messiah and his family were mistreated because of jealousy and selfishness. How can any of us expect to be treated any better?

    • Anita Mathias says

      January 18, 2013 at 9:07 pm

      Oh, that’s so hard! I just prayed that Abba Father may continue the process of healing your wounds. The writer Mary DeMuth has written a book about her childhood sexual abuse, and her journey of healing from it.

  4. Debra Seiling says

    January 18, 2013 at 12:46 am

    Dear Anita,
    I have pinned your blog on Pinterest, as a blog I’m following. Since I’m just learning how to use Pinterest, I’m not sure how to draw traffic to it, but wanted to give your blog credit. Debra Seiling http://bible-passages.blogspot.com  and http://christian-overeaters.blogspot.com

    • Anita Mathias says

      January 18, 2013 at 9:05 pm

      Thanks much, Debbie. I am not on Pinterest myself, as can’t keep up with too much social media. Limit myself to the big 3–Blogging, FB and Twitter. Have a GPlus account, but rarely update it.

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If you'll forgive me for adding to the noise of th If you'll forgive me for adding to the noise of the world on Black Friday, my memoir ,Rosaries, Reading, Secrets: A Catholic Childhood in India, is on sale on Kindle all over the world for a few days. 
Carolyn Weber (who has written "Surprised by Oxford," an amazing memoir about coming to faith in Oxford https://amzn.to/3XyIftO )  has written a lovely endorsement of my memoir:
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The memoir is available on sale on Amazon.co.uk at https://amzn.to/3u0Ib8o and on Amazon.com at https://amzn.to/3u0IBvu and is reduced on the other Amazon sites too.
Thank you, and please let me know if you read and enjoy it!! #memoir #indianchildhood #india
Second birthday party. Determinedly escaping! So i Second birthday party. Determinedly escaping!
So it’s a beautiful November here in Oxford, and the trees are blazing. We will soon be celebrating our 33rd wedding anniversary…and are hoping for at least 33 more!! 
And here’s a chapter from my memoir of growing up Catholic in India… rosaries at the grotto, potlucks, the Catholic Family Movement, American missionary Jesuits, Mangaloreans, Goans, and food, food food…
https://anitamathias.com/2022/11/07/rosaries-at-the-grotto-a-chapter-from-my-newly-published-memoir-rosaries-reading-steel-a-catholic-childhood-in-india/
Available on Amazon.co.uk https://amzn.to/3Apjt5r and on Amazon.com https://amzn.to/3gcVboa and wherever Amazon sells books, as well as at most online retailers.
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Friends, it’s been a while since I blogged, but Friends, it’s been a while since I blogged, but it’s time to resume, and so I have. Here’s a blog on an absolutely infallible secret of joy, https://anitamathias.com/2022/10/28/an-infallible-secret-of-joy/
Jenny Lewis, whose Gilgamesh Retold https://amzn.to/3zsYfCX is an amazing new translation of the epic, has kindly endorsed my memoir. She writes, “With Rosaries, Reading and Secrets, Anita Mathias invites us into a totally absorbing world of past and present marvels. She is a natural and gifted storyteller who weaves history and biography together in a magical mix. Erudite and literary, generously laced with poetic and literary references and Dickensian levels of observation and detail, Rosaries is alive with glowing, vivid details, bringing to life an era and culture that is unforgettable. A beautifully written, important and addictive book.”
I would, of course, be delighted if you read it. Amazon.co.uk https://amzn.to/3gThsr4 and Amazon.com https://amzn.to/3WdCBwk #joy #amwriting #amblogging #icecreamjoy
Wandering around Oxford with my camera, photograph Wandering around Oxford with my camera, photographing ancient colleges! Enjoy.
And just a note that Amazon is offering a temporary discount on my memoir, Rosaries, Reading, Steel https://amzn.to/3UQN28z . It’s £7.41.
Here’s an endorsement from my friend, Francesca Kay, author of the beautiful novel, “An Equal Stillness.” This is a beautifully written account of a childhood, so evocative, so vivid. The textures, colours and, above all, the tastes of a particular world are lyrically but also precisely evoked and there was much in it that brought back very clear memories of my own. Northern India in the 60s, as well as Bandra of course – dust and mercurochrome, Marie biscuits, the chatter of adult voices, the prayers, the fruit trees, dogs…. But, although you rightly celebrate the richness of that world, you weave through this magical remembrance of things past a skein of sadness that makes it haunting too. It’s lovely!” #oxford #beauty
So, I am not going to become a book-bore, I promis So, I am not going to become a book-bore, I promise, but just to let you know that my memoir "Rosaries, Reading, Secrets: A Catholic Childhood in India," is now available in India in paperback. https://www.amazon.in/s?k=rosaries+reading+secrets&crid=3TLDQASCY0WTH&sprefix=rosaries+r%2Caps%2C72&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-doa-p_1_10My endorsements say it is evocative, well-written, magical, haunting, and funny, so I'd be thrilled if you bought a copy on any of the Amazon sites. 
Endorsements 
A beautifully written account. Woven through this magical remembrance of things past is a skein of sadness that makes it haunting. Francesca Kay, An Equal Stillness. 
A dazzling vibrant tale of childhood in post-colonial India. Mathias conjures 1960s India and her family in uproarious and heart-breaking detail. Erin Hart, Haunted Ground 
Mathias invites us into a wonderfully absorbing and thrilling world of past and present marvels… generously laced with poetic and literary references and Dickensian levels of observation and detail. A beautifully written, important, and addictive book. Jenny Lewis, Gilgamesh Retold 
Tormented, passionate and often sad, Mathias’s beautiful childhood memoir is immensely readable. Trevor Mostyn, Coming of Age in The Middle East.
A beautifully told and powerful story. Joining intelligent winsomeness with an engaging style, Mathias writes with keen observation, lively insight and hard-earned wisdom. Carolyn Weber, Surprised by Oxford 
A remarkable account. A treasure chest…full of food (always food), books (always books), a family with all its alliances and divisions. A feat of memory and remembrance. Philip Gooden, The Story of English
Anita’s pluck and charm shine through every page of this beautifully crafted, comprehensive and erudite memoir. 
Ray Foulk, Picasso’s Revenge
Mathias’s prose is lively and evocative. An enjoyable and accessible book. Sylvia Vetta, Sculpting the Elephant
Anita Mathias is an is an accomplished writer. Merryn Williams, Six Women Novelists
Writing a memoir awakens fierce memories of the pa Writing a memoir awakens fierce memories of the past. For the past is not dead; it’s not even past, as William Faulkner observed. So what does one do with this undead past? Forgive. Forgive, huh? Forgive. Let it go. Again and again.
Some thoughts on writing a memoir, and the prologue to my memoir
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#memoir #amwriting #forgiveness https://amzn.to/3B82CDo
Six months ago, Roy and I decided that finishing t Six months ago, Roy and I decided that finishing the memoir was to be like “the treasure in the field,” that Jesus talks about in the Gospels, which you sacrifice everything to buy. (Though of course, he talks about an intimate relationship with God, not finishing a book!!) Anyway, I’ve stayed off social media for months… but I’ve always greatly enjoyed social media (in great moderation) and it’s lovely to be back with the book now done  https://amzn.to/3eoRMRN  So, our family news: Our daughter Zoe is training for ministry as a priest in the Church of England, at Ridley Hall, Cambridge. She is “an ordinand.” In her second year. However, she has recently been one of the 30 ordinands accepted to work on an M.Phil programme (fully funded by the Church of England.) She will be comparing churches which are involved in community organizing with churches which are not, and will trace the impact of community organizing on the faith of congregants.  She’ll be ordained in ’24, God willing.
Irene is in her final year of Medicine at Oxford University; she will be going to Toronto for her elective clinical work experience, and will graduate as a doctor in June ‘23, God willing.
And we had a wonderful family holiday in Ireland in July, though that already feels like a long time ago!
https://anitamathias.com/2022/09/01/rosaries-readi https://anitamathias.com/2022/09/01/rosaries-reading-secrets-a-catholic-childhood-in-india-my-new-memoir/
Friends, some stellar reviews from distinguished writers, and a detailed description here!!
https://amzn.to/3wMiSJ3 Friends, I’ve written a https://amzn.to/3wMiSJ3  Friends, I’ve written a memoir of my turbulent Catholic childhood in India. I would be grateful for your support!
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