Dreaming Beneath the Spires

Anita Mathias's Blog on Faith and Art

Calvinism is Clever, but Would Jesus Recognise it?

By

File:John Calvin Titian B.jpg
Calvin, by Titian
Calvin—Okay, I have summarized Christianity: Total depravity, unconditional election, limited atonement, irresistible grace, perseverance of the saints.
Jesus–Excuse me, I am not sure I understand you.
Calvin–You know, TULIP, what you taught.
Jesus—What I taught? I am sorry, but I don’t understand a word of it.
Calvin, scratching head–Stop joking, Jesus. This is serious. Why, haven’t you seen John Piper, my hyper-follower’s brilliant 221 word summary of Christianity—which is all about you, you know?
God is the sovereign, transcendent and personal God who has made the universe, including us, his image-bearers. Our misery lies in our rebellion, our alienation from God, which, despite his forbearance, attracts his implacable wrath. 
But God, precisely because love is of the very essence of his character, takes the initiative and prepared for the coming of his own Son by raising up a people who, by covenantal stipulations, temple worship, systems of sacrifice and of priesthood, by kings and by prophets, are taught something of what God is planning and what he expects. 
In the fullness of time his Son comes and takes on human nature. He comes not, in the first instance, to judge but to save: he dies the death of his people, rises from the grave and, in returning to his heavenly Father, bequeaths the Holy Spirit as the down payment and guarantee of the ultimate gift he has secured for them—an eternity of bliss in the presence of God himself, in a new heaven and a new earth, the home of righteousness. 
The only alternative is to be shut out from the presence of this God forever, in the torments of hell. What men and women must do, before it is too late, is repent and trust Christ; the alternative is to disobey the gospel.
Jesus—I taught all that?
Calvin—Stop it, Jesus. What did you teach then?
Jesus—But why didn’t you read the Gospels, if you wanted to know? Here are 221 words I remember saying,
I came not to call the righteous but sinners; not to judge the world, but to save it. 
Repent and believe the good news.
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind. Love your neighbour as yourself.” All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.
Don’t be afraid. Do not worry about anything at all.  Peace I give you. Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. 
I teach so that my joy may be in you, and your joy may be full.
When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, nothing will be impossible for you.
He who eats my flesh and drinks my blood lives in me, and I in him.
Take and drink; this is my blood of the covenant which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins. Do this in memory of me.
My Father will give you another counsellor—the Spirit of Truth.  He will be with you and in you. You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you.
Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation.
Calvin—That’s far too simple. That’s how a blogger would write. But we are theologians, you and I.
Jesus—No, just you. I spoke to be understood.

More from my site

Share this...
Share on Facebook
Facebook
Tweet about this on Twitter
Twitter

Comments

  2. Yes, theologies which make people cold, self-righteous, proud, arrogant, sure of themselves and disdainful of others move further and further away from the gentle, humble spirit of Jesus!

    Mary McCarthy had a great line, “Religion is only good for good people.”

  3. The gospels present Jesus constantly getting into it with the scribes and Pharisees, you know, the religious leaders. Who are those guys today? The Calvinists I suppose, they're the loudmouthed religious leaders and whenever we (in America anyhow) think of a loudmouthed obnoxious religious leader like a scribe or a Pharisee its the Calvinists to be sure. So, obviously, Jesus was blow holes in their orthodoxy just as he did the Pharisees.

  4. Hi Sipech,
    Yes, summaries are necessarily reductive, and show our biases!

    LA, Love this paragraph from your comment,
    “whether or not being able to *define* God and his plan for our salvation really matters to my faith, or whether allowing him to be mysterious and his ways to be mysterious is good enough for me. I think I like God to be undefined, mysterious and full of love and for me to be flawed, human and struggling but loving as best as I can.”

    Indeed!

  5. I think there's good reason that the bible isn't presented as a systematic theology: it's not meant to be one!

    Any attempt to summarise it, whether it be in 220 word summaries, creeds, statements of belief, doctrinal bases, etc. is bound to miss something out.

    That's not to say that either of the views you show above are wrong; it's just that neither of them are complete.

    I think of the bible as a really big picture (probably an oil painting). You might be able to give a rough description, but such summaries are like trying to take a photo with a really low resolution camera.

    To get the whole picture, you need the *whole picture* even if you may think some parts aren't as interesting or relevant as others.

  6. Until I started reading this one American blog, I thought that I kinda “knew” the various camps and generally how they differed from one another. But I simply had no earthly clue that there would be such discussion on minutiae. There are 3-point Arminians and 4-point Arminians and the full-blown 5-point Arminians and then then ever-faithful Calvinists, and pelagianism and semi-pelagianists and Weslyans, and every other variation under the sun.

    For a while, I posted comments that boiled down to “Isn't it all about loving one another and loving God and the rest is up to God's Grace?” and “we'll find out when we're dead all the answers to our questions, until then, just do our best to follow God's commandments.” Boy, did I get flamed. One ungracious reader replied to me “Have you seriously read any part of the actual Bible?” I replied that I had actually read the entire thing several times, especially the part where Jesus says “Love one another…on this one commandment hangs all the law and the prophets.” I thought that boiled the whole thing down rather nicely. That spurred on a flurry of replies that created great confusion in me regarding salvation.

    Where I landed is that I need to sort out first whether or not being able to *define* God and his plan for our salvation really matters to my faith, or whether allowing him to be mysterious and his ways to be mysterious is good enough for me. I think I like God to be undefined, mysterious and full of love and for me to be flawed, human and struggling but loving as best as I can.

    But then there's the geek in me that's always drawn to a good theoretical disagreement :). Lacking directly provable empirical data, however, is a stumbling block for me…so it's back to undefined and mysterious – LOL.

  8. Cute script, but not entirely honest. If you're boiling both “camps” down to around 220 words, then yes, you're pretty close. However, there's so much more to the Bible than either of these people's 220 words, and I think that must be taken into account. Also, I doubt Calvin would try to call Jesus a theologian, especially to his face. 🙂 On the whole, I think this post really addresses the issue that most Calvinists have: not putting love first. I think many of us (yes, I'm one of them) need to be reminded of this repeatedly.