Dreaming Beneath the Spires

Anita Mathias's Blog on Faith and Art

Archives for December 2010

Proverbs 1, 1-6, Day 2. Jan 2nd

By

 1 The Proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel:

 2 for gaining wisdom and instruction;
   for understanding words of insight;
3 for receiving instruction in prudent behavior,
   doing what is right and just and fair;
4 for giving prudence to those who are simple,[a]
   knowledge and discretion to the young—
5 let the wise listen and add to their learning,
   and let the discerning get guidance—
6 for understanding proverbs and parables,
   the sayings and riddles of the wise.

And this is what the Proverbs are for:

For gaining wisdom and insight

And prudence for the simple-hearted

Learning what is right and just and fair

Giving knowledge and discretion to the young

Helping the wise become wiser

And the discerning receive guidance

I.e. They are for everyone, the simple, the wise, the young, the learned.

Lord, bless my reading of them.

The One who is Blessed: Psalm 1,Day 1. Jan 1st

By

The One who is Blessed

Psalm 1

 1 Blessed is the one
   who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take 

Wow! This is a pretty intense and meaty 6 sentences. I like it because I have always wanted God’s blessing, and here is a description of what that looks like.

The one who is blessed is one who does not do what the wicked do. You may land up more righteous than most, even goody-goody, but your reward will be the blessing of the Lord, which, after all, is what you really want.


or sit in the company of mockers, 

He has nothing to do with mocking, or such nastiness. There is something diabolical about mocking because it undermines your opponent’s dignity. 

Because when you mock you do not say what you really mean, which is a trait of the speech of God.


2 but whose delight is in the law of the LORD,
   and who meditates on his law day and night. 

The one who is blessed delights in God’s word, and meditates on it continually.

As our hearts and actions are shaped by the objects of our thoughts and meditation, so too our destiny is shaped by the objects of our thought and meditation.


3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, 

The person rooted in God’s word will be as rooted and reliable and unshakeable as one planted by ever-fresh streams of water.

And God’s word will be for him these streams of living water


which yields its fruit in season 

And the season of ripeness for individuals does not follow natural laws. In the right season according to God’s timetable, the one rooted in God’s word will bear fruit.


and whose leaf does not wither— 

Because it draws nourishment from God’s streams of living water, God’s law, and God’s word.
The fruit befits the roots,


whatever they do prospers.

And this is another mark of the one rooted in God’s word, who does what he hears from God. Whatever he does, prospers.

I think of Samuel’s words to Saul 1 Sam 10:6 The Spirit of the LORD will come powerfully upon you, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person. 7 Once these signs are fulfilled, do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you.


 4 Not so the wicked!
   They are like chaff

 which the wind blows away

Impermanence and transitoriness, fickleness and shadows of changing, marks the ways of the wicked, in contrast to the rooted stability of the righteous.

The wicked are impermanent and transitory

They are best ignored

Sooner or later, in this life or the next

The wind will blow them away.


  5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
 nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

 6 For the LORD watches over the way of the righteous,
   but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.

 God watches over those who seek to do the right thing.

But the way of the wicked is a moral downward spiral,

Whether visible to the eye or not.

It will end as all downward spirals too.

Matthew 1–Matthew 2:12, Day 2. Jan 2nd

By

MATTHEW 1

 1 This is the genealogy of Jesus the Messiah, the son of David, the son of Abraham:

 2 Abraham was the father of Isaac,
   Isaac the father of Jacob,
   Jacob the father of Judah and his brothers,
 3 Judah the father of Perez and Zerah, whose mother was Tamar,
   Perez the father of Hezron,
   Hezron the father of Ram,
 4 Ram the father of Amminadab,
   Amminadab the father of Nahshon,
   Nahshon the father of Salmon,
 5 Salmon the father of Boaz, whose mother was Rahab,
   Boaz the father of Obed, whose mother was Ruth,
   Obed the father of Jesse,
 6 and Jesse the father of King David.

   David was the father of Solomon, whose mother had been Uriah’s wife,
 7 Solomon the father of Rehoboam,
   Rehoboam the father of Abijah,
   Abijah the father of Asa,
 8 Asa the father of Jehoshaphat,
   Jehoshaphat the father of Jehoram,
   Jehoram the father of Uzziah,
 9 Uzziah the father of Jotham,
   Jotham the father of Ahaz,
   Ahaz the father of Hezekiah,
 10 Hezekiah the father of Manasseh,
   Manasseh the father of Amon,
   Amon the father of Josiah,
 11 and Josiah the father of Jeconiah[c] and his brothers at the time of the exile to Babylon.

 12 After the exile to Babylon:
   Jeconiah was the father of Shealtiel,
   Shealtiel the father of Zerubbabel,
 13 Zerubbabel the father of Abihud,
   Abihud the father of Eliakim,
   Eliakim the father of Azor,
 14 Azor the father of Zadok,
   Zadok the father of Akim,
   Akim the father of Elihud,
 15 Elihud the father of Eleazar,
   Eleazar the father of Matthan,
   Matthan the father of Jacob,
 16 and Jacob the father of Joseph, the husband of Mary, and Mary was the mother of Jesus who is called the Messiah.

17 Thus there were fourteen generations in all from Abraham to David, fourteen from David to the exile to Babylon, and fourteen from the exile to the Messiah.

Hmm. I like this—the ones he chose. His ancestors: Kings and shepherds. Good kings and bad ones. The most famous men of Israel, and the ones who are only remembered as a name on a genealogical record.

And these are the ones good enough to be his ancestors: Jacob, liar, swindler, manipulator and deceiver, WHO SEES GOD; Judah, promiscuous, a liar and deceiver, who colludes in the attempted murder of Joseph; Tamar who tricked her father-in-law; Rahab, prostitute; Jesse, father with favourites; David, not above adultery and murder; Solomon, most uxorious and lustful of kings, and then from 14 no-name generations, comes the Messiah.

 18 This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. 19 Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

Joseph wanted to do the right thing but kindly. He was a mixture of righteousness and gentleness. How the world needs Josephs!

  20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said,

And let us then never underestimate the sweetness and wisdom of dreams. Much like “speaking in tongues,” they are a way in which God can break through to our unconscious mind.

“Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid

The great words which angels always speak, “Do not be afraid.”

If I am doing something purely out of fear, it is then, for me, almost a reason to examine it more closely, and see whether I should do it. Fear has nothing to do with the omnipotent God, for whom all things are possible

 to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 

What is conceived was of the Holy Spirit, and yet it came mixed with scandal, disgrace, sorrow and suffering.

Your words or actions might be criticized, mocked, scorned or ridiculed. However that does not necessarily mean that they are not from the Holy Spirit.

21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus,because he will save his people from their sins.”

And that is the sweetest of promises—sanctification, progressive sanctification. The promise that we shall be progressively delivered from the power of sin in this life.

And that in God’s sight, we are now his toddlers, and he no more holds our sins against us forever, than we hold our toddler’s tears and tantrums when they are too tired to sleep against them.

 22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: 23 “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”(which means “God with us”).

Immanuel, God with us, born out of the sheerest impossibilities, a virgin conceiving.

Immanuel, God with us. Wonderful thought. What more do we need? Let me never forget that you are with me, Lord. Because if you are with me what have I to fear?

Lord, you are with me, whether I am popular or lonely, whether I make loads of friends or lose them, when I remember you, and when I forget you. Thank you.



 24 When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. 25 But he did not consummate their marriage until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.

Matthew 2

 1 After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem 2 and asked, “Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.”

God reveals himself to all sort of people, and in all sorts of ways—through dreams, through visions, though an inner voice, through the wise men from the east who have seen his star.

Not everything from the East is necessarily of the occult. Yoga for instance, has been a blessing to my father, whom had excellent mental and physical health until he died at 89, and to me, who has only taken it up 2 years ago.



 3 When King Herod heard this he was disturbed, and all Jerusalem with him.

A new thing, a new King, a new centre of power.

And what is the reaction of King Herod, and all Jerusalem with him. He was threatened, disturbed.



. 4 When he had called together all the people’s chief priests and teachers of the law, he asked them where the Messiah was to be born. 5 “In Bethlehem in Judea,” they replied,

Jesus was born in Bethlehem, but few knew that, since he grew up in Nazareth. We need to be aware of the possible width of interpretations of prophetic words, whether in Scripture, or spoken to us by others, or heard in the stillness of our own spirit.

 “for this is what the prophet has written:

 6 “‘But you, Bethlehem, in the land of Judah,
   are by no means least among the rulers of Judah;
for out of you will come a ruler
   who will shepherd my people Israel.’”

The mark of a leader after God’s own heart—He shepherds his people. He is not am empire-builder, not a visionary, not absorbed in tangential activities. He loves people, and shepherds them.

 7 Then Herod called the Magi secretly and found out from them the exact time the star had appeared. 8 He sent them to Bethlehem and said, “Go and search carefully for the child. As soon as you find him, report to me, so that I too may go and worship him.”

Would you have believed Herod? I would. I would have been impressed. Give me wisdom, Lord, to know when to believe, and when to doubt.



It is always safer not to take people’s words at face-value but to watch and pray to see if everything adds up.



 9 After they had heard the king, they went on their way, and the star they had seen when it rose went ahead of them until it stopped over the place where the child was.

Never underestimate guidance.

Lord, in my undertakings, give me stars. Let me see them as they go ahead of me, and see them when they stop over the place where Jesus lies.

 10 When they saw the star, they were overjoyed. 

The normal human reaction to the revelation of God.

11 On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh.

The instinctive response of worship is to give. We give our treasures. We give ourselves.

 12 And having been warned in a dream not to go back to Herod, they returned to their country by another route.

Dreams again. How they speak to us!

 Speak sweetly to me, Lord, in my dreams.

And warn my heart of dangers my conscious mind can’t see.

Amen.

Genesis 1 and Genesis 2, Day 1. Jan Ist

By

Genesis 1

The Beginning

 1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.


It sounds like the creative process, doesn’t it? You have nothing, everything is formless and empty and covered by darkness. There is but one thing in your favour.

The Spirit of God hovering over you.

So a reminder as we start this year, perhaps feeling empty and dark and uncertain: God’s Spirit hovers longingly over you.

Come Sweet Spirit fill us.


 3 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. 



It’s amazing–what can happen at the word of God. Light comes from darkness. 
Lord, when you speak, things happen. Just like that.You say it, and it is done. Things can change in a moment, when you say the word

You know where I need light, Lord. Speak the word. Speak creativity over me.


4 God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. 

And it is good, your light.

Help me Lord this year to make the most of the hours of daylight, your lovely light. Help me to rise with the sun, and to sleep early and well.

Sin, interestingly, is known by Paul as the deeds of darkness.


5 God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.

 6 And God said, “Let there be a vault between the waters to separate water from water.” 7 So God made the vault and separated the water under the vault from the water above it. And it was so. 8 God called the vault “sky.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day.

 9 And God said, “Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so. 10 God called the dry ground “land,” and the gathered waters he called “seas.” And God saw that it was good.
    11 Then God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.” And it was so. 12 The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. 13 And there was evening, and there was morning—the third day.

Look at the immense creativity and activity of God. And, we as Christians, and as human being, share God’s nature.
The logical order of creation. Food for animals and humans—even before they are created! The providence of God in action!



 14 And God said, “Let there be lights in the vault of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark sacred times, and days and years, 15 and let them be lights in the vault of the sky to give light on the earth.” And it was so. 16 God made two great lights—the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars. 17 God set them in the vault of the sky to give light on the earth, 18 to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw that it was good. 19 And there was evening, and there was morning—the fourth day.

Order, rhythms, are built into creation. No wonder part of our very natures crave order, predictability, routines, sacred times and days and years, the days governed, the night governed. 

 20 And God said, “Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the vault of the sky.” 21 So God created the great creatures of the sea and every living thing with which the water teems and that moves about in it, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. 22 God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth.” 23And there was evening, and there was morning—the fifth day.

Beauty, creativity, abundance, this is so part of God’s very nature. Come Holy Spirit, fill our hearts with God’s very nature—creativity, ideas teeming, flying, living, fruitful and increasing.


 24 And God said, “Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: the livestock, the creatures that move along the ground, and the wild animals, each according to its kind.” And it was so. 25 God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good.
    26 Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals,[a] and over all the creatures that move along the ground.”

 27 So God created mankind in his own image,
   in the image of God he created them;
   male and female he created them.


And that is why we need despair of no man. Because we are made of mud and the breath of God. Made in the image of God!! That is why human goodness will always surprise us.


And so it is never absolutely futile to appeal to someone’s better nature. For we all have it.


And when all appeals to someone’s better nature fail, there is yet one supreme court, prayer, which might move God to file an appeal on your behalf.


Because we are made in the image of God, no one is so impervious to the movement of God that prayer cannot change him or her.


 28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”
 29 Then God said, “I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. 30And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds in the sky and all the creatures that move along the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food.” And it was so. 


Interesting—the animals were vegetarian, people were vegetarian. We lived without suffering being involved in our food.

I still think that the best diet might be one which stays as close to vegetarianism and fruitarianism as possible, though I find it hard to do without meat.  So I stick to free-range, organic meat. If I have to eat animals, I want at least to ensure that they have suffered as little as possible in the process.
    31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day.

Genesis 2

 1 Thus the heavens and the earth were completed in all their vast array.

Completed: That’s God. What he begins, he finishes. How beautiful are the last words of Jesus on the Cross: It is finished. The blessed relief of those words.

He similarly tells his father, “I have completed the work you have given me to do.
Both Roy and I have pretty mercurial minds, our interests shift, new projects claim our attention. We are both trying to train ourselves to finish what we have started (provided it is worth finishing) before turning our attention to fresh fields and pastures new.

in all their vast array

That’s God for you. Plenitude, abundance. Variety and lots of it. The God of generosity. He’s a great God, and worth serving.


 2 By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. 3 Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.


The seventh day, is built into creation, in lunar months, which are roughly 28 days, and in the moon itself which enters into a new phase every 7 days–waxing crescent, waxing gibbous, waning gibbous, waning crescent.
One of the best flippant tags I have come across on Sabbath observance is “To get the best results, obey the manufactor’s instructions.” I burn out before the end of the week if I have either work or stress on Sundays, and conversely, thoroughly resting, even catching up on sleep, keeps me fresh and green through the week. 


Adam and Eve

 4 This is the account of the heavens and the earth when they were created, when the LORD God made the earth and the heavens.

 5 Now no shrub had yet appeared on the earth[a] and no plant had yet sprung up, for the LORD God had not sent rain on the earth and there was no one to work the ground, 6 but streams[b] came up from the earth and watered the whole surface of the ground. 

That’s God for you—life, abundance, it cannot help but spring up.


 Then the LORD God formed a man[c] from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.

And there in a sentence is a complete understanding of human beings—a mixture of dust and clay—fallibility, impermanence, fickleness,  dirt,  we are friable, mouldable, have an immense capacity for ugliness, we are nothing.

We are everything—for God has breathed into us–the breath of God, beauty, permanence, inspiration, loveliness, creative abilities

All men are capable of infinite goodness, kindness and decency—and infinite cruelty and sadism,

Mud and the breath of God. That is what we are.


 8 Now the LORD God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden;

I think it charming that one of God’s first activities was to plant a garden.

Thought and work, the sacred combination.

God thought things into being. But he also chose to work physically for the healthy, happy feeling of sweat and fatigue on brow. He could have thought that garden into being, as today, I could afford to hire a gardener and be an imagineer rather than a gardener. But that would be boring. We would rather work the ground ourselves. So with the ability to think infinite wealth into being, God still chose to labour–for the joy of work.


and there he put the man he had formed. 9 The LORD God made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground—trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food.

The perfection of art, things both beautiful and useful. Pleasing to the senses, and good for the body.

Isn’t that still our desideratum for food—that it should be attractive and delicious.


In the middle of the garden were the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

 10 A river watering the garden flowed from Eden; from there it was separated into four headwaters. 11 The name of the first is the Pishon; it winds through the entire land of Havilah, where there is gold. 12 (The gold of that land is good; aromatic resin[d] and onyx are also there.) 13 The name of the second river is the Gihon; it winds through the entire land of Cush.[e] 14 The name of the third river is the Tigris; it runs along the east side of Ashur. And the fourth river is the Euphrates.

 15 The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. 

Man’s first task—to make the earth even more fruitful. And to take care of the earth.


16 And the LORD God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”

There are boundaries and prohibitions around any decent life. Without them, nothing gets done. And so one boundary, just one was placed for man—you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.


 18 The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

It is not good for the man to be alone. A stark, bare uncompromising statement.

So it is not good for us to accept aloneness. It is important for us to seek friendship, even community if it can be found.

I see friendship as a web of concentric circles around the secret heart of an individual. When you are first getting to know someone else they are somewhere on the outermost circles, and they and you gradually move closer to each other’s true hearts. So friendship is a process one needs to be patient with.


 19 Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals.

Naming seems to be an essential function of the human mind, the way we take in and absorb reality. In a sense we possess or become friends with something once we know its name.
 I have lived in three continents for at least 10 years each. On each, once I knew the names of the birds, plants, trees and butterflies and foods, I began to feel more at home.


   But for Adam no suitable helper was found.
Stark sad words.

 21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

 23 The man said,

   “This is now bone of my bones
   and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
   for she was taken out of man.”

 24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

I have been married for 21 years; this is a beautiful description of the bonding in marriage.

Though bone of my bone, and flesh of my flesh should really be applied to one’s children, it is interestingly applied to one’s spouse—so deep is the knitting in marriage.

 25 Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.

The happiness of marriage—a private kingdom of total acceptance and relaxation.

The Christian's First Duty: Being Happy in Christ—George Mueller

By

George Mueller



Hmm. I find this passage really interesting. I encountered it probably a few years ago, and legalistically followed it. 


Then, I thought it was a man-made rule not God’s, and went back to prayer before Scripture. But as Mueller observes, prayer can take up one’s entire allotted quiet time, and also, as Mueller says, it can take 10, 15, even 30 minutes before the mind stops wandering and begins to pray.

So, though my spirit often longs to pray and hear God’s voice “as the deer thirsts for living waters,” I think I am going to reverse the order, and begin with meditation on God’s word.

And next year, God willing, is going to be the year of God’s word for me, since I am starting a new big project–blogging through the entire Bible in a year. I start on Jan 1st. So help me, God!!

Food For the Inner Man – George Mueller

by George Mueller (1805-1898)

While I was staying at Nailsworth, it pleased the Lord to teach me a truth, irrespective of human instrumentality, as far as I know, the benefit of which I have not lost, though now…more than forty years have since passed away.
The point is this: I saw more clearly than ever, that the first great and primary business to which I ought to attend every day, to have MY SOUL HAPPY IN THE LORD. The first thing to be concerned about was not, how much I might serve the Lord, how I might glorify the Lord; but how I might get my soul into a happy state, and how my inner man might be nourished. For I might seek to set the truth before the unconverted, I might seek to benefit believers, I might seek to behave myself as it becomes a child of God in this world; and yet, not being happy in the Lord, and not being nourished and strengthened in my inner man day by day, all this might not be attended to in a right spirit.
Before this time my practice had been, at least for ten years previously, as a habitual thing, to give myself to prayer, after having dressed in the morning. Now I saw, that the most important thing I had to do was to give myself to the reading of the Word of God and to meditation on it, that thus my heart may be comforted, encouraged, warned, reproved, instructed; and that thus, whilst meditating, my heart might be brought into experimental communion with the Lord. I began therefore, to meditate on the New Testament, from the beginning, early in the morning.
The first thing I did, after having asked in a few words the Lord’s blessing upon His precious Word, was to begin to meditate on the Word of God; searching, as it were, into every verse, to get blessings out of it; not for the sake of the public ministry of the Word; not for the sake of preaching on what I had meditated upon; but for the sake of obtaining food for my own soul. The result I have found to be almost invariably this, that after a very few minutes my soul has been led to confession, or to thanksgiving, or to intercession, or to supplication; so that though I did not, as it were, give myself to prayer, but to meditation, yet it turned almost immediately more or less into prayer.
When thus I have been for awhile making confession, or intercession, or supplication, or have given thanks, I go on to the next words or verse, turning all, as I go on, into prayer for myself or others, as the Word may lead to it; but still continually keeping before me, that food for my own soul is the object of my meditation. The result of this is, that there is always a good deal of confession, my soul invariably is even sensibly nourished and strengthened and that by breakfast time, with rare exceptions, I am in a peaceful if not happy state of heart. Thus also the Lord is pleased to communicate unto me that which, very soon after, I have found to become food for other believers, though it was not for the sake of the public ministry of the Word that I gave myself to meditation, but for the profit of my own inner man.
The difference between my former practice and my present one is this. Formerly, when I rose, I began to pray as soon as possible, and generally spent all my time till breakfast in prayer, or almost all the time. At all events I almost invariably began with prayer. But what was the result? I often spent a quarter of an hour, or even an hour on my knees, before being conscious to myself of having derived comfort, encouragement, humbling of soul, etc.; and often after having suffered much from wandering of mind of the first ten minutes, or a quarter of an hour, or even half an hour, I only then began really to pray.
I scarcely ever suffer now in this way. For my heart being nourished by the truth, being brought into experimental fellowship with God, I speak to my Father, and to my Friend (vile though I am, and unworthy of it!) about the things that He has brought before me in His precious Word.
It often now astonishes me that I did not sooner see this. In no book did I ever read about it. No public ministry ever brought the matter before me. No private intercourse with a brother stirred me up to this matter. And yet now, since God has taught me this point, it is a plain to me as anything that the first thing the child of God has to do morning by morning is to obtain food for his inner man.
As the outward man is not fit for work for any length of time, except we take food, and as this is one of the first things we do in the morning, so it should be with the inner man. We should take food for that, as every one must allow. Now what is the food for the inner man: not prayer, but the Word of God: and here again not the simple reading of the Word of God, so that it only passes through our minds, just as water runs through a pipe, but considering what we read, pondering over it, and applying it to our hearts.
I dwell so particularly on this point because of the immense spiritual profit and refreshment I am conscious of having derived from it myself, and I affectionately and solemnly beseech all my fellow-believers to ponder this matter. By the blessing of God I ascribe to this mode the help and strength which I have had from God to pass in peace through deeper trials in various ways than I had ever had before; and after having now above forty years tried this way, I can most fully, in the fear of God, commend it. How different when the soul is refreshed and made happy early in the morning, from what it is when, without spiritual preparation, the service, the trials and the temptations of the day come upon one!
-George Mueller 

On a LifeStyle of Forgiveness

By

The Giant Red Star Mira

 

“A Lifestyle of Forgiveness.” I owe this phrase to Jack Miller, father of our friend Paul. Jack, a pastor, writer, theologian, founder of World Harvest Mission etc. etc. wrote a moving book called Come Back Barbara. 
Barbara, his daughter, was an angry renegade and prodigal, moved in with a druggie, as I remember from the book (I hope correctly.) No matter what Barbara did, Jack forgave her, as instantly as he could, and just resolved to love her more heartily. He developed a remarkable “lifestyle of forgiveness” in his phrase, letting things go, responding to insult with the determination to love in return.

Wow!  Forgiveness can have as dramatic an effect on your spiritual life, as cutting all sugar and white flour, white rice, pasta etc can have on your health, mental health, energy levels, emotional well-being, and intellectual ability. (This cutting is a recent experiment for a season, and after the first 2-3 days, I feel great).

As I have written on this  blog, I had a transformational spiritual experience in New Zealand last year. I stood transfixed by a waterfall rushing on, and saw a little pile of sticks, stones, leaves and creatures, that remained stuck behind a rock. If one does not forgive, one remained stuck behind a rock, not rushing on in the waterfall of God.

I had been treated unfairly a couple of years before this experience, and keenly felt the injustice. I brooded, probably got a bit bitter, and unhappy, and was stuck. Now I forgave totally and rushed on. And words came. I had been in the throes of a long winter of writers’ block, and now began to write easily, fluently and in a new style.
* * *

God must have really, really wanted me to learn forgiveness because I have had a lot to forgive this year!! I blogged about decisions made in the Christian community I belong to, actions and decisions which had left half the community seething and simmering. I blogged about these things in a series of outspoken posts called “The Screwtape Lectures” which left the other half of the congregation seething and simmering. Oh dear!

Tentacles of bitterness which defile many. People said and did things to me as a result of these outspoken, though honest, blog posts (now deleted, dear reader!). Oh dear, more things to forgive.

When I left for Spain on the 16th December, I had a LOT to process. Anger, hurt, desire for justice, annoyance at seeing injustice triumph, desire to see God vindicate me against my adversaries, and sheer mixed-upedness about whether God wanted me to continue the Screwtape Letters (and I’ve had an answer from him, a complex carbohydrate answer), some repentance, and sadness over the people I unwittingly hurt.

One of them, a woman I liked a lot, came over to chat about those blogs. I got tearful, as I do when overwrought. Seeing me cry, she got red, and started crying. Wow! Talk about weeping with those who weep.
* * *

There is nothing like travel when you are overwrought, when there are dozens of ideas racing through your head, when your emotions are unsettled.

In Spain, I tasted again the goodness of God. Sheer, unmerited mysterious goodness. I felt peace settle over my spirit again. Deep peace. The peace that, Paul says, transcends understanding because why should I be experiencing the peace of God’s love and God’s shalom, when I was not without sin in what I did, and when the road ahead was unclear? But there it settled in my soul, sweet honey. Shalom, well-being.

I loved God, and he loved me. He healed me. Set me back on my feet. Renewed me. Made me new.

I slept long and well and dreamed. In my dream, I felt again this honey of peace and joy slowly seep through my soul. Woke with incredible peace and joy. I said to myself, “I forgive everyone.” And then, my left-brain said to me, “Wait a minute, Anita. You forgive everyone? Don’t you need to go through the everyone and the aught and any and forgive them one by one.”

And so, like a good rationalist, I went through the people. A bit of mild annoyance remained at some particular bits of untruthfulness, deceit and perfidy, but basically, I had let things go. God had worked on my sleeping spirit. I felt amusement rather than anger at some things people had said and done to me, and just shook my head at them. Oh blessed relief!

God healed me, and put me together in those 9 days in Granada, when I slept a lot, and prayed a lot, and rested a lot, and listened to him a lot. He restored my soul. Restored energy, optimism, and joy. A sense of anticipation. The joy of life!
* * * 

I am reading the early chapters of Matthew about the Magi following the star.

Star of wonder, star of light, star of royal beauty bright, where are you leading? It is definitely, but infinitesimally moving.

Oddly enough, for someone who has always believed that Christians need as much of koinonia, Christian fellowship, as they can get, I feel the star moving away. I have heard entirely too much anger-producing gossip by Christians about other Christians, and my soul needs to hear less. I have got too enmeshed in a smoke-and-mirrors, fear-filled, gossipy, internecine situation–where people are far more concerned about how other people perceive, value and rate them, rather than about what God thinks of them– and I need a short break from it, not from attending church, but from being quite so enmeshed in it. I need to move outwards. Where? Towards the edges of the congregation for now. And then? I am following the star.
* * *

Small ponds are unhealthy for fish and Christians. My Christian life in my church now feels like an unhealthy small pond.

I need a bigger pond.

Luckily, my life in Oxford has another centre of gravity. The very first month I arrived here, January 2006, I joined three groups to which I still belong. I joined a church, St. Aldate’s. I joined a home group, Headington. And I joined a writer’s society, an invitation only group, which now has about 160 members. We have made many friends there, genial, clever, well-read, often erudite people. So on my calendar
, for the next couple of months, I have dinners and lunches with fellow-writers, individuals and couples. It will be good to branch out into the wider world, to truly be quiet, gentle loving salt and light in another sphere.

I feel God saying I need to withdraw slightly from my church for the health of my soul. But I am steadily making Christian friends through my blogging, and that’s good too. Fresh air, a bigger pond!

Tomorrow to fresh woods, and pastures new. 

 

Christmases Past and Present

By

We’re having an Oxford Christmas today and like Scrooge, I am thinking of Christmases past.

Oxford  and Christmas. Both words come to me freighted with so many associations, memories, traditions, books, films, experiences.

Our family said that we would go to the Christmas Day service at our church, St. Aldate’s which usually does all things well (barring the occasional high decibel-osity of the worship music). But somehow none of us believed that we would really go.

We keep Christmas Day as the one sacred family day, and though I love having people over, the children would rather not have Christmas guests. (I am planning to invite people over on Christmas Eve next year, as our church is running a program to open your home to internationals over Christmas).

In our house, it’s a do as you like day. Christmas presents opened in pyjamas. The roast–duck or goose or turkey–put in still in pyjamas. The kids being very loud without being hushed.

The aromas of the roast bird filling the house. A slow meal. Christmas cake. A family game. A family DVD perhaps (Inkheart today).

It’s a day to relax and decompress, and those are the associations it has for us, a long day of resting, relaxing, family fun and decompressing. It’s like a Sunday without homework, or church or any housework.

We enjoy it so much that when travel over Christmas, we used to have a Mathias Christmas Day a week before. We’d have presents, turkey, Christmas music, rest, relax and have a family day on Dec 6th or 12th or 19th, whenever the postman had delivered the last present.

And then, around Christmas, we travelled. Sometimes California or Florida. Or Mexico, Costa Rica, Madrid, Barcelona. What struck me in these Spanish-speaking countries was that Christmas was was not an indoors private event as in English-speaking countries. Whole families went out into the public squares. When it was really, really crowded, they walked in curvy crocodiles, arms on each other’s shoulders, whole extended families together. They looked at the crib. They bought Navidad goodies. They celebrated together.

Our family is somehow immune to the craziness of Christmas. I used to send Christmas cards and letters to friends and family. I hated the task, and it was a pall over Christmas. Now I don’t send any cards or letters at all. I call my mother, and get together with close friends. I even gave up the Christmas letter, because I didn’t quite see the point of it.

When we were first married, I read a stress reducing tip for Christmas. Go to Christmas parties and events, but don’t have your own. Everyone is over-stretched anyway, so enjoy people without adding a stress to anyone’s calendar. And so we hibernate, making the most of all the social events, though we often have a day of cookie making, and invite the girls’ friends over, which they seem to enjoy.

Presents have gradually been retired from our Christmases. I personally have reached the stage where there is no particular material thing I really want. So I’ve sort of said “no Christmas presents” to Roy, or if I see something extravagant, like a sequinned shawl in a peacock pattern made to a Victorian pattern in the Pre-Raphaelite exhibition in the Ashmolean, I tell Roy he can buy it for me early. Actually this year, he wanted something. A fleece or two, and a pair of clogs. And by telling me he wants them for Christmas, he can get out of the dread task of shopping which he hates.

Presents for children are something else. We used to give them just a few things until they went to school (in America) where for weeks before Christmas, the little children talked about what they were getting for Christmas. I guess, being young myself then, I didn’t want my children to feel sad when they inevitably compared notes.

So I got catalogues, and clicked and clicked. Each year of Christmas presents was more extravagant than the previous one. Though the girls were thrilled with their presents,saying’ thank you Mum and Dad,’ and giving us each a hug  began to be an effort. By the end of the Christmas bling, everyone’s cheeks hurt. The last year that we were in America, we gave them 14 presents each, and spent $1600 on presents.  Because we had ten for Zoe, and nine for Irene, then bought 1 more for Irene, and saw 2 lovely things, then had to buy one more for Zoe, but bought two more. It’s like trying to cut hair perfectly straight. Too much. Too, too much. None of us are tidy people. Where to store all these things? Which to play with first? How to keep parts together? A mistake! We overwhelmed those little girls with presents.

And then, we moved to England, where houses are smaller. The first Christmas here, we gave them £50 each in lovely golden shiny pound coins, and 50 pences, and 20ies, tens and fives and 1s. We scattered these all over the house. Irene, who was five woke up, saw them, and stopped spell-bound, picking them up, and playing with them quietly in the corridor. When Zoe woke up, she said in awed tones, “Zoe, there’s MONEY in the house.” She had had a head start, but they raced around for ages, finding money in the bathtub, corridors, stove, every possible place. Some was never found as is the case with treasure hunts!!  They remember the surprise of their treasure hunt as a magical memory.

We had one extravagant Christmas in England, when we left shopping till Christmas eve, and then scoured the shops, spending something like £1000 trying to find the elusive perfect gift. Some of the presents bought in that panic of exhaustion, the girls have not worn very much. Some they love.

No more. Now we just give them one or two things on Christmas Day, and then give them a largish budget for the sales afterwards, to get the year’s wardrobe. I sometimes go with them, sometimes not. I really, really hate crowds and sales, and would rather pay more to get the perfect item than snap up things because they are cheap. However, it must be said that things are seriously cheap in post-Christmas sales.
 There are several inches of snow on the ground. We often have a Christmas Eve ramble but this year, I don’t know if I am going to summon up the gumption to leave my house.
What a retrospective ramble. Since this is my first year of blogging, we don’t yet have a family policy of whether blogging is okay on Christmas Day while the turkey is being prepared for the oven.. That is Zoe and Roy’s job. I have never learned to cook well–and have given up on trying to learn to cook decades ago. Within the first few months of our 21 year old marriage actually. There are some men who never cook, which is deemed okay. Why not have some women who never cook? Yeah, I think blogging is okay on Christmas Day.

 

The British Library’s Exhibition on the Continuing Evolution of English

By


British Library

British Library

Sponsored Post

One of the things on my list for the New Year is to go to the British Library exhibition on Evolving English, which continues until the 3rd April 2011. It has treasures such as the only surviving manuscript of Beowulf, Shakespeare ‘quartos’, the King James Bible, Dr Johnson’s dictionary and recordings of famous speeches by Churchill, Gandhi and Mandela — together with early examples of advertising posters, lists of slang, early newspapers from around the world, trading records, comics, adverts, children’s books, dialect recordings, text messages and web pages.
I speak and write a particularly hybrid English—in an accent to match!!–because of my migrations between three English speaking countries. I began speaking English in India where I was one of the quarter of a million who spoke it as a first language. (Another 232 million speak it as a second or third language). I first came to England as an undergraduate student at Somerville College, Oxford University, and spent three years here in the eighties. After that, I moved to America to go to graduate school, and lived there for seventeen years. I returned to England seven years ago, and have lived here ever since.
What particularly struck me was how much spoken British English had evolved in the 17 years I had lived elsewhere. There was a plethora of new slang. I saw controversial ads for a “Chav-free holiday.”  Chav? What’s that? Wikipedia suggests  the offensive backronym “Council Housed And Violent” or the suggestion that pupils at Cheltenham Ladies’ College used the word to describe the young men of the town (“Cheltenham Average”).  Chavs, in turn, according to my research, have their distinctive vocabulary and world view summarized by the statement, “I ain’t bovvered.”
Indeed, language had evolved as much as fashion had. Slang evolves constantly as yesterday’s vivid terms become today’s hackneyed phrases, and we need new words to express our strongest emotions and hang-ups. In fact, there is probably no better way to track the evolution of English than to compare the Facebook statuses of my young friends in their teens and twenties with those of my generation, people in their late forties. The younger people almost appear to be speaking a different language, more vivid and colourful than our language, which tends to be more static. Facebook and blogs probably contribute to a far more rapid dissemination of slang compared to 25 years ago when slang originated and caught on within one’s peer group.
The overuse of strong words, of course, leads to the watering down of their meaning. “The reaction was immense” people say, when it was mild approbation. “I massively respect you,” “I am desperate to see you,” people say to express rather mild respect or desire. There are new expressions of delight, “Score. Major score. Win.” Another expression I have come across is the present continuous, often modified by so, “I am so loving this.” Though British English seems to be to be drifting in the direction of Americanisms (“how awesome!!”) there are charming British-only expressions adopted from the language of children—“Six sleeps till Christmas” abbreviated to Crimbo, which is a neologism I hadn’t heard a quarter century ago.
Visit the website. It includes a quiz which I initially played at the Easy-Peasy level, getting 5 out of 6, though I admit some answers were guesswork. I then tried the Egghead level, and scored the same!!  http://www.bl.uk/evolvingenglish/quiz.html,

Here are the facts about the exhibition:

  • Evolving English: One Language, Many Voicesopens at the British Library on 12 November and is open until 3 April
  • Cost: free
  • While at the exhibition you can record your voice to add to the collection preserved for future study and analysis.
  • The URL is www.bl.uk/evolvingenglish
  • Tweet using #evolvingenglish

Share hosted by Wikio