Marriage and parenting | Anita Mathias: Dreaming Beneath the Spires

On Juggling

Anita Mathias — Sun, 08 Mar 2015 15:00:55 +0000

Irene, my 15 year old, has decided to become a master juggler. (I blame Baroness Susan Greenfield who told her class that juggling makes you clever). And now the air is full of the swish-swish-swish of juggling balls. And as for me, words and ideas which might have been sublime (one can always dream!) slip […]

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Thoughts on my Twenty-Fifth Wedding Anniversary

Anita Mathias — Thu, 20 Nov 2014 21:57:40 +0000

So Roy and I have been married for 25 years. It’s customary to dispense advice on such occasions, but I have little to give. The things that have worked for us have evolved slowly. And conversely, some advice from the marriage books—“Always go to the bed at the same time,” have wasted time. * * […]

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The Gift of Limits. The Gift of Learning to Say No

Anita Mathias — Sun, 19 Jan 2014 21:23:21 +0000

Here’s a striking story from The Emotionally Healthy Church by Pete Scazzero. Rabbi Edwin Friedman tells the story of a man who had given much thought to what he wanted from life. After trying many things, succeeding at some and failing at others, he finally decided what he wanted. One day the opportunity came for […]

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On Tiger-Mothers, and Good-Enough Christian Mothers

Anita Mathias — Sat, 21 Jul 2012 00:05:00 +0000

So I read through Amy Chua’s article, The Battle Hymn of the Tiger-Mother, and feel I have failed as a mum. (This, of course, is the uneasy reaction the sassy book was intended to evoke.) “Zoe and Irene,” I say dramatically. “I have failed as a tiger-mother.” Zoe snorts. “You never were a tiger-mother, Mum. Especially now. You […]

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Where 90% of marital problems begin (according to my pastor)

Anita Mathias — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:28:00 +0000

About a decade ago, Roy and I presented ourselves for marital counselling with the very busy senior pastor of the mega-church we attended in Williamsburg, Virginia. He had a three session rule. He’d solved your problem in three sessions, if he could, and then decide whether to embark on extended counseling with you, or refer […]

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My Heavenly Daughter

Anita Mathias — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 19:20:00 +0000

Irene saunters into my bedroom where I am trying to have quiet time. I inform her of this fact. She wrinkles her nose. Well, she says, “Why don’t you just discuss things with your heavenly daughter?”

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Only A Like Button

Anita Mathias — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 19:11:00 +0000

I was musing aloud to Roy, clarifying my thoughts through the process of talking as many extroverts do, when, suddenly, he contradicted me. What? Contradicted the truest truth. “Don’t contradict me before hearing me out, Roy,” I said crossly. “Don’t you wish I were your Facebook with only a Like Button?” he rejoined.

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Irene and Anne of Green Gables

Anita Mathias — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 19:35:00 +0000

Irene and I were swimming together at David Lloyd’s, her chattering animatedly as usual. Finally, I said, facetiously, “Irene, let’s be quiet for a bit. Let me meditate on my sorrows.” “Oh, don’t,” she said, “You’ll become morbid!” What? “Where did you learn that from, Irene?” “Anne of Green Gables.” She has listened to all […]

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My God, My God, Why did you Employ Me? The Perils of Children’s Church

Anita Mathias — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 21:49:00 +0000

On Easter Sunday, we had the much dreaded all-age service, or “children’s church”. (No one wanted to miss the Easter service to teach kids, restless kids would make for distracted parents, so the Anglican compromise appears to be, pitch the Easter sermon to the kids.) Anyway, the Rector read the familiar passage of Jesus’s death and resurrection, […]

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In which Irene discovers the power of prayer

Anita Mathias — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 14:42:00 +0000

Irene, 11, is totally awed by the power of prayer. She was totally addicted to her beloved iPod touch, listening to books on it, emailing, playing games, sleeping with a story playing, waking to its alarm. It was becoming her life. What I objected to were the games. I asked my prayer group, Anne, Juliet, […]

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