You are so right. Some relationship aren’t restored – the other person may be unwilling, for a start! I have certainly had to learn that people can’t be argued into restoration, and am at this time still asking God what he really means to do, and means me to do, about one particular sadness of broken relationship, and another which is confusingly neither restored nor not restored – which maybe I have to ditch. In my case, it is as it were I have forgiven, but that feels (feels!) like it should result in something more peaceful than it does! I’m not angry – but … I suspect you know how this feels too! Always love the serpent and dove quote, so very, very wise. Blessings.

I am a learner in forgiveness. I am going through some forgiveness work,and think I’m done. But memory might bring up a new stray comment or strand of the situation or relationship, and I will find myself going through it again. I guess that’s what Jesus meant by the 70 times 7.
I also think forgiveness does not mean that every relationship should be restored. It’s remembering graciously with the wisdom of the serpent and the gentleness of the dove. anitamathias.com/2014/05/26/people-can-change-remember-graciously-wisdom/

I love this post.

Can I add something about ‘forgiveness’? We hear a lot about it in church … we need also to hear about how you can forgive more easily than you can ‘forget’ since the hurt is sometimes branded on our hearts, and that will take a long time, and needs more prayer, more work of the will, and God’s healing touch. And we need to understand when we have done the forgiving, not to feel we haven’t done it properly. So, now we are dealing with the hurt, in prayer & personal work. Do others agree with this, I wonder? St Ignatius leaves out ‘turn it towards the sun’ in his wonderful insight about the twig: if the twig is attached to a branch, turn it to the sun/Son. (Works with pot plants anyway … how much more with us!)

Indeed. Oh Lord have mercy on us, for it isn’t easy! 🙂

Lilly, thank you!

Thank you, Jim. It’s one of the hardest, and yet, most beneficial and liberating aspects of the spiritual life, isn’t it?