Comments on: “Fine, Let Them Judge Me”: The Peace of Boundaries

By: The "I Don't Do" List Makes Possible the "I Do" List. You Must Revise Your Life - Dreaming Beneath the Spires

Mon, 06 Jan 2014 20:03:19 +0000

[…] I don’t take meals round for people, except for close friends or in cases of genuine need. I did do that for several women who were ill […]

By: God Comes to Those Who Dare to be Different: Do Not Be Afraid - Dreaming Beneath the Spires

Wed, 01 Jan 2014 14:14:56 +0000

[…] slow down the pace of our treadmill, one by one dropping the activities and time-and-life-sucking trivial imposed “duties” we most […]

By: Anita Mathias

Anita Mathias — Tue, 10 Dec 2013 20:35:41 +0000

In reply to Ali. Welcome, Ali :-)

By: Ali

Ali — Tue, 10 Dec 2013 20:33:23 +0000

In reply to Anita Mathias. no, Ali B- a newbie :)

By: Anita Mathias

Anita Mathias — Tue, 10 Dec 2013 19:33:03 +0000

In reply to Ali.

Yay. If it was liberating to let it go, it sounds like it was the right decision. You know, peace as a guard at our hearts…
(Are you Ali H.?)

By: Ali

Ali — Tue, 10 Dec 2013 17:48:39 +0000

Amen to this!
I decided a short while ago, partly after reading a blog of yours about just doing the thing God was asking me to do, and not all the others, no matter how worthy, to step down from friday night youth club, which I have done pretty much every friday in term time for 6 years…not easy as it’s full of teens and short on leaders, but, Hey! God’s in charge, not me, and it was liberating to let it go 🙂

Thanks!

By: Anita Mathias

Anita Mathias — Tue, 10 Dec 2013 07:57:01 +0000

In reply to Alison Hector. Indeed, thank you, Alison!

By: Alison Hector

Alison Hector — Mon, 09 Dec 2013 23:11:02 +0000

Yesssss! Needed this today. There is freedom in boundaries, as strange as that might sound to many. Thanks, Anita!

By: Anita Mathias

Anita Mathias — Mon, 09 Dec 2013 22:43:30 +0000

In reply to Annie Carter.

Annie, yes. Christians face special pressures to donate their time, energy, talents and money, and so we in particular need to learn to say “NO,” which I’ve been so bad at, for so long.
“It makes me feel sad to think that there are weaker people who give in constantly to others’ demands out of a sense of Christian duty.” Indeed.
“Boundaries,” is the next book that I am going to read. I really think I need to!

By: Annie Carter

Annie Carter — Mon, 09 Dec 2013 22:39:37 +0000

Your experience is shocking. It horrifies me to think that so-called Christians could ever behave in such a fashion.
Have you ever read the book ‘Boundaries’ by Drs Cloud/Townsend? It deals with these issues so well.

I’m a firm believer in volunteering my help/time/talents, and considering requests for them, but am very resistant to pressure or guilt tripping. I also desire to follow God’s leading in my life, and to serve in ways he shows me. It’s interesting that Jesus often didn’t do what the people wanted, or react straightaway to their demands. I once refused to collect someone in my car from the other side of town to take them to a meeting near where I live. Upon suggesting that the individual take the bus (as I would have done in their situation), they replied that they ‘didn’t like buses’!

When you’re following God’s guiding and his plan for your life, there’s so much peace, rather than stress or resentment. It makes me feel sad to think that there are weaker people who give in constantly to others’ demands out of a sense of Christian duty.

Thanks for writing this post.